Hi I'm anna, I'm struggling to deal with my head or my heart...my partner of 11 years has taken relapse on heroin. He's been on subtex for around 10 months, which seems to be where the problems started. Since being on the medication he was taking heroin at least 3 times a week and now it's an everyday habit. He wakes up unable to 'deal' with the everyday responsibilities of our 4 children (2 of which are only 3 weeks old so there's not a great bond there) he is under the delusion that by going out and 'making himself better' it makes him a better dad as he can feel 'normal' to play with them. I am however at the end of being patient while he tries to 'fix' where he went wrong. I love this man very much but I am now at the point where after 11 years there is nothing left for me to give, I can't support him, our 4 children and deal with how I'm making ends meet each day. But I also feel by ending our relationship I'm letting him down, and giving up on him. I'm so confused and need guidance from anyone who has or is in the same position as me.
Hi Anna , you have done all you can to help this guy- you cannot "fix" him, nor can he "fix" himself while he continues to use- he needs to get clean - only he can decide to do that - you are not responsible for him - you need to start taking care of YOU and your kids- look up your local Narcotics Anonymous group, they have a group called Nar-Anon for families of addicts there you will find other people in the same situation as yourself - you will be made welcome, with no judgement - everybody there is in the same boat - give them a call - you need to move on with your life- your husband needs to learn to live with the consequences of his addiction- and reach out for help - you cannot give him the help he needs - not your responsibility or your job to get him clean - he needs to do this for himself- only he can make this work- keep posting here for support and make that call to NA - best of luck -
