Somewhat off topic, but then again relevant to recovery.
I tell ya I like this therapy I'm getting.
Scenario: I'm watching Euromaxx today. They have on some German dude and how he makes big bucks selling retro "MOD" stuff........he's got a mod reveloution going on........pretty cool.......my mom says "Oh look he ain't Hugo Boss, but that kid is smart".......she likes how he's making money.
Then this young guy from Ireland they showcase.......he designs furniture.....from wood.........my mom says "Oh look at that face. That kid got the map of Ireland smacked right on his face".........I ignore that.......they show this fabulous chair he designed........I say "WOW, man he is talented".......my mom then says "Big whoop it's a copy of an AMES piece"......I say "No it ain't. It ain't remotely like an Ames piece"..........this ticks her off a bit as she was the designer..........and I'm lucky I can draw a stick person, but I know a little bit about furniture design.
HERE YA GO: "The da*n Irish.........they ain't never invented nutin good cept the potato.........and look at him........I mean all ya have to do is look at him and know he's Irish.........they all got the same da*n face..........and they are so cocky.........he ain't that talented.......and look how cocky he is!
Why am I writing all this.........cause it may have to do with heroin....plus ya know I write aimless twit like stuff.
See, I am IRISH..........my mother is 100% German..........my dad was 100% German.........my siblings are 100% German............BUT my biological father was Irish............he did not raise me..........I do not know him........I don't wanna know him..........my dad was my dad...........BUT my mom was always honest with me and never said anything bad about my bio father except that he was a DRUNK.........she don't use the word alcoholic..........and well she's a no nonsense lady who takes no crap from anyone........especially where her kids are concerned...........so she divorced him pronto before I was 1 year old.
You would NEVER have caught my mom on a board like this asking should she leave a man came home late..........who didn't make his family #1 priority....her answer to that is "Get the hell up and walk out"......which she did.
So, while this went on with this Irish designer I finally said.........and this is 47 years..........took me 47 years to say this.........."Mom, shut UP. SHUT THE HELL UP about this designer. YOU MARRIED an Irishman didn't ya? What's that say about you?".............she says "It says I made a huge mistake"!
I go "Well then I'm a MISTAKE. Did you EVER ONCE think while I was growing up despite you forbidding me to admit I'm Irish did ya think maybe it bothered ME as I was the ONLY Irish genetic person in a huge extended family?"......at first she pooh-poohed my words........"Oh stop it you know what I mean".......yeah I do know what ya mean.........ya mean I'm a no good potato eater"...........a fist a cuffing, fiddle playing, beer swilling MICK.......I'm also SHANTY I guess too............so all these years maybe every freaking time ya said that stuff it bothered me, O.K.?
THERAPY: I tell ya it works cause for the first time in her life my own mother was speechless...........a miracle in itself.........and ya know deep down it did bother me..........my dad never said nothing like that...........she did........and truthfully I think it's that bio guy she hates and not the entire Irish world......and she should deal with it not me.
I'm never, ever disrespectful to my mom........but anymore in extreme cases like that............it calls for extremem measures.......thus I was kind of fresh.....she ain't sorry, but it shut her the he*l up...........and thinking back there'd be times I was high and think.........this is that bio man's fault I got an addiction gene...........that man gave me a defective gene..........so it's alright I'm a heroin addict cause I got an excuse..........I'm Irish.
So, therapy I must say works........and wanted to share.......if ye read this far.
EDIT: To say my mom has Irish grandchildren, and adores them. She has dear Irish friends she loves. For anyone Irish here hopefully this didn't offend you. Just a lil thing I've dealt with growing up. No excuse to use, but I finally told her how I felt. Before I'd have went and copped a bag. Ya know cause I'm Irish. LOL
***Anytime I was fist fighting is when I was told I was Irish. "That comes from them people. Them fighting Irish. You got that from them". Only time I got told that, and anyway lucky I did cause I stood up for myself and my siblings and friends so tough***
| QUOTE |
| HERE YA GO: "The da*n Irish.........they ain't never invented nutin good cept the potato.........and look at him........I mean all ya have to do is look at him and know he's Irish.........they all got the same da*n face..........and they are so cocky.........he ain't that talented.......and look how cocky he is! |
Ah. The irony.
I enjoyed that post. Your moms a real Roit. My family is so mutted down we can't poke fun at nobody ". My Granny "mom's mom" mostly German lil Irish, lil other stuff. Gramps "mom's dad" Greek, Irish, Native American Indian. Dads, Mom was German. Dads, dad was Jewish. Guess that makes me American.
Glad you let your mom know it was hurtful to you. " i'm not really jewish at all my dads dad was", I get defensive about it lol.
Everybody has their good and bad traits. After reading this everytime i hear Irish i'll think of you. My Jewish grand dad had red hair thou he was always taken for being Irish. Maybe he was not all jewish at all either. my dad grows a red beard most people connect red with Irish. My last name is suposibly jewish i've not been able to do much Genealogy search on it "Goley". Jewish identity passed on through the mother has been universally accepted by Jews. I don't got ANY Mother jewish blood so i'm not jewish i guess. I carry that last name, till i marry.
My famly has a huge mix of gentics in dog that's often a good thing!. Many pure breeds are racked with genetic disorders that bring much harm to the dogs. Mongrel's not nessarly a bad thing "smile" lol.
Glad you let your mom know it was hurtful to you. " i'm not really jewish at all my dads dad was", I get defensive about it lol.
Everybody has their good and bad traits. After reading this everytime i hear Irish i'll think of you. My Jewish grand dad had red hair thou he was always taken for being Irish. Maybe he was not all jewish at all either. my dad grows a red beard most people connect red with Irish. My last name is suposibly jewish i've not been able to do much Genealogy search on it "Goley". Jewish identity passed on through the mother has been universally accepted by Jews. I don't got ANY Mother jewish blood so i'm not jewish i guess. I carry that last name, till i marry.
My famly has a huge mix of gentics in dog that's often a good thing!. Many pure breeds are racked with genetic disorders that bring much harm to the dogs. Mongrel's not nessarly a bad thing "smile" lol.
Bryn, sometimes those Irish eyes aren't smilin' are they?
Words can really hurt us deep down where we live, where no one ever sees.
Sometimes we don't even know we've been hurt until something like the scene you wrote about happens, and it all surfaces.
It's good you got out how you felt, even if nothing changes, at least you have purged the feelings.
Too re loo re loora.................
rita
Words can really hurt us deep down where we live, where no one ever sees.
Sometimes we don't even know we've been hurt until something like the scene you wrote about happens, and it all surfaces.
It's good you got out how you felt, even if nothing changes, at least you have purged the feelings.
Too re loo re loora.................
rita
Well I got my shelaleigh or whatever it's called..........and I'm gonna go beat someone senseless like on "The Gangs Of New York".
Yeah, my mother she's a regular riot............people love her..........I mean they adore this lady............she's a Scorpio if that means anything.
I'm in a heavy duty wanting to use mood............and she wonders why my borhter got ulcerative colitis and a bad ticker...........and the other one got a bad ticker and TICS.............they all got TICS.........except for me........ya know why? Cause I cry if I want to wherever I want to...........and I'm IRISH!
Yeah, so no need to chew my shirt collar.........or make these high pitched sounds out of nowhere.........or clear my throat constantly............or move my da*n jaw so much it might as well fall out.
ZG, oh you'd be just fine in my mom's book.........trust me...........she told me to marry "a nice Jewish boy"..............told me my entire life that one......wanna switch places with me ZG?
Last Jewish guy I dated ahd an Alfa Romao car.........I thought it was made by Volkswagon..............took me to a show............at the CASINAAAAAA....parked in the free lot at one of the casinaaaaaa's........the show was five miles down in another..............made me get on a jittney.......with about fifty pounds of gold and diamonds on my arse.........ya know why................cause it was the principal of the thing he had to park for FREE..................this is pre drugs for me.........cause if I'd have been using I'd have no diamonds and gold, and I may as well have robbed the guy.........a jittney...............him, me and no fire arm.........and alot of unsavory folks........who knew gang memebers took a jittney.
No, no this is not all Jewish men of course..........just like all Irish people ain't my drinking bio dad..............but this cat...........nightmare...........and still had the audacity after he said I look like Elizabeth Shue to try and sleep with me.....yeah, I don't care if ya get me a Penthouse........I was not having casual you know what with someone made me get on a jittney...
Thanks though you guys........heck yeah I was mad..........I'm tired and I'm mad............and it ain't my fault she married an Irishman now is it? Besides who amongst us knows who their father is? I think I am Swedish........or whatever Bjork is...........yeah volcanic ash and all ate my brain away......Bjork is my sister..............and I'm gonna join her band.
Too funny that ALL TROUBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you my loves.
Yeah, my mother she's a regular riot............people love her..........I mean they adore this lady............she's a Scorpio if that means anything.
I'm in a heavy duty wanting to use mood............and she wonders why my borhter got ulcerative colitis and a bad ticker...........and the other one got a bad ticker and TICS.............they all got TICS.........except for me........ya know why? Cause I cry if I want to wherever I want to...........and I'm IRISH!
Yeah, so no need to chew my shirt collar.........or make these high pitched sounds out of nowhere.........or clear my throat constantly............or move my da*n jaw so much it might as well fall out.
ZG, oh you'd be just fine in my mom's book.........trust me...........she told me to marry "a nice Jewish boy"..............told me my entire life that one......wanna switch places with me ZG?
Last Jewish guy I dated ahd an Alfa Romao car.........I thought it was made by Volkswagon..............took me to a show............at the CASINAAAAAA....parked in the free lot at one of the casinaaaaaa's........the show was five miles down in another..............made me get on a jittney.......with about fifty pounds of gold and diamonds on my arse.........ya know why................cause it was the principal of the thing he had to park for FREE..................this is pre drugs for me.........cause if I'd have been using I'd have no diamonds and gold, and I may as well have robbed the guy.........a jittney...............him, me and no fire arm.........and alot of unsavory folks........who knew gang memebers took a jittney.
No, no this is not all Jewish men of course..........just like all Irish people ain't my drinking bio dad..............but this cat...........nightmare...........and still had the audacity after he said I look like Elizabeth Shue to try and sleep with me.....yeah, I don't care if ya get me a Penthouse........I was not having casual you know what with someone made me get on a jittney...
Thanks though you guys........heck yeah I was mad..........I'm tired and I'm mad............and it ain't my fault she married an Irishman now is it? Besides who amongst us knows who their father is? I think I am Swedish........or whatever Bjork is...........yeah volcanic ash and all ate my brain away......Bjork is my sister..............and I'm gonna join her band.
Too funny that ALL TROUBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you my loves.
| QUOTE |
| she's a Scorpio if that means anything. |
Watch it now.
Bryn, my little Irish mother had a few choice sayings.
one: get a good job and keep a free leg.
two: I curse the day I ever saw the face of any one of ye (directed at any one of the 5 of us at various times)
three: leave me alone, I don't want any presents, I just want you to leave me in peace.
Four: I'm glad I'm on the way out of this world not coming in,
Five: Leave me alone, I've got troubles of my own (this if we ever came to her with any kind of problem or looked for comfort)
Sixth: Oh, the devil s..t on ye! (now, could antyhing be worse than that happening to anyone?)
But you know, she loved us all ferociously, and we knew it, and never really took offense. It was just Mama being Mama.
We all laugh about these things when we get together, and all know that if we ever said those things to anyone of our kids, they would be traumatized.
One of the last things my mother ever said to me was this'
She was very close to death, and had been really in a coma for a few days, and as my sister and I were around her bed, she opened her eyes, and said very clearly: "Rita", so of course I leaned over close to here, wondering what her message to me might be, and she opened her eyes, gave me "the look"
and said 'STOP SNAPPING THE GUM" and lapsed back into her sleep.
My sister and I laughed so loud the nurse came in to see what had happened.
We couldn't even talk to tell her everything was ok.
My gum snapping was always a source of annoyance to her. She died a few days later, but all the good things stay with me, and the bad things are just that, bad things that are over.
Stay strong Bryn, the good things are worth keeping, the bad things are just not worth holding on to.
love, rita
one: get a good job and keep a free leg.
two: I curse the day I ever saw the face of any one of ye (directed at any one of the 5 of us at various times)
three: leave me alone, I don't want any presents, I just want you to leave me in peace.
Four: I'm glad I'm on the way out of this world not coming in,
Five: Leave me alone, I've got troubles of my own (this if we ever came to her with any kind of problem or looked for comfort)
Sixth: Oh, the devil s..t on ye! (now, could antyhing be worse than that happening to anyone?)
But you know, she loved us all ferociously, and we knew it, and never really took offense. It was just Mama being Mama.
We all laugh about these things when we get together, and all know that if we ever said those things to anyone of our kids, they would be traumatized.
One of the last things my mother ever said to me was this'
She was very close to death, and had been really in a coma for a few days, and as my sister and I were around her bed, she opened her eyes, and said very clearly: "Rita", so of course I leaned over close to here, wondering what her message to me might be, and she opened her eyes, gave me "the look"
and said 'STOP SNAPPING THE GUM" and lapsed back into her sleep.
My sister and I laughed so loud the nurse came in to see what had happened.
We couldn't even talk to tell her everything was ok.
My gum snapping was always a source of annoyance to her. She died a few days later, but all the good things stay with me, and the bad things are just that, bad things that are over.
Stay strong Bryn, the good things are worth keeping, the bad things are just not worth holding on to.
love, rita
Ohhhhhh, awwww Rita thank you so much for sharing that with us.......now my Irish Eyes Are Smiling........I would have loved to meet your mom.
Tough until the end huh? When you leaned in ya thought finally you were getting a warm, feel good, fuzzy message........LOL........only her admonishment was even better about the gum.
So, that's how you got your dance lessons as well, right? Your mom worked for the woman taught you dance...........that is so neat........she must have loved you all so furious because she raised one kind, sympathetic, funny daughter.
Actually today I was telling my therapist about that little scene.......and she said how did it end.......I was like "For the first time in her life she was rendered speechless"............and she said it's good because I'm changing for the better so will others change in the way they treat you.
Honestly, my mom is a really good person.......she's just crazy critical.......and it was passed on to her from a time way back when marrying outside your culture and heritage was still frowned upon.......you know too them tiny neighborhoods and the pockets.......don't go over the Italian side, and so forth.
So, that I get, but she married an Irishmen........best is when I told her then you made a huge mistake, didn't ya? LOL Thank you guys for sharing and well the world hands us all stuff........and I will keep in mind to keep the good stuff, Rita.
Hurt Dad..........SCORPIO.........oh it means alot to me as I'm a total believer in astrology........planet alignment..........I figured nobody here was also......but let me tell you, my mom..........you wrong her......she WILL get you........not today and not tomorrow.........up the road.........she will get you.......Tres will vouch for that as she knows her..........my nephew is a Scorpio as well......sweetest, kindest kid...........but you cross him.........he won't flip out.......he waits, and boy he will get you way up the road when ya least expect it.
Oh and they have no time for forgiveness if you ain't family........they just POOF act like ya never existed.............see, see how I grew up........LOL......I'm an Irish Colleen........with a parent would go to war for her kids..
Tough until the end huh? When you leaned in ya thought finally you were getting a warm, feel good, fuzzy message........LOL........only her admonishment was even better about the gum.
So, that's how you got your dance lessons as well, right? Your mom worked for the woman taught you dance...........that is so neat........she must have loved you all so furious because she raised one kind, sympathetic, funny daughter.
Actually today I was telling my therapist about that little scene.......and she said how did it end.......I was like "For the first time in her life she was rendered speechless"............and she said it's good because I'm changing for the better so will others change in the way they treat you.
Honestly, my mom is a really good person.......she's just crazy critical.......and it was passed on to her from a time way back when marrying outside your culture and heritage was still frowned upon.......you know too them tiny neighborhoods and the pockets.......don't go over the Italian side, and so forth.
So, that I get, but she married an Irishmen........best is when I told her then you made a huge mistake, didn't ya? LOL Thank you guys for sharing and well the world hands us all stuff........and I will keep in mind to keep the good stuff, Rita.
Hurt Dad..........SCORPIO.........oh it means alot to me as I'm a total believer in astrology........planet alignment..........I figured nobody here was also......but let me tell you, my mom..........you wrong her......she WILL get you........not today and not tomorrow.........up the road.........she will get you.......Tres will vouch for that as she knows her..........my nephew is a Scorpio as well......sweetest, kindest kid...........but you cross him.........he won't flip out.......he waits, and boy he will get you way up the road when ya least expect it.
Oh and they have no time for forgiveness if you ain't family........they just POOF act like ya never existed.............see, see how I grew up........LOL......I'm an Irish Colleen........with a parent would go to war for her kids..
