I need help/advice. My boyfriend of 9 years, and the father of my 2 children is battling a long, long fight with drugs. It started 3 years ago with pills and soon went to heroin. He stole everything from me and my children multiple times. Last year he actually stole all the video games and tv I bought my son for Christmas and traded them in for money 3 weeks before Christmas, I was devastated, I had to borrow money from friends and family to go back out and shop again. He has stolen the iPads, and xboxs out of my house also. He has been on suboxone for about 1 year now and is still relapsing. He will only use for about a day and get caught and then every time I go to kick him out he makes me guilty and I let him back in. My children absolutely adore him, and look up to him so much. He does have a very good job and does pay for most of the bills since I don't make much money. When he is clean he is an amazing guy and would do anything for anyone. I just am really starting to not understand again...he says he has low self esteem, he lost practically all of his friends not really because of drugs but because of not going out and staying very distant. This last time from last weekend, he took a check for $1,600 that we were waiting on to help us catch up on bills and pay rent and spent the whole this so I am right back in the hole I was already in. Please any advice will help considering how lost I am and feel!! Thank you in advance!!
Dear Lexx,
I am really sorry to hear of this painful story. Unfortunately, it is easily predictable - addicts cause chaos to those who love them. It is particularly painful when young children are in the mix.
I strongly encourage you to seek out some kind of Family Support program:
1. Most Treatment Centers, as part of their normal offering, will offer counseling and workshops to Family members.
2. AL Anon and NAR Anon are programs designed for someone who loves an addict.
There are some basic principals that take some time to realize:
1. You are powerless over someone else's addiction.
2. Learn healthy boundaries
3. Ensure you are safe and healthy, whether your loved one is or not.
I hope this helps - please reply if you'd like me to ellaborate.
Fly.
I am really sorry to hear of this painful story. Unfortunately, it is easily predictable - addicts cause chaos to those who love them. It is particularly painful when young children are in the mix.
I strongly encourage you to seek out some kind of Family Support program:
1. Most Treatment Centers, as part of their normal offering, will offer counseling and workshops to Family members.
2. AL Anon and NAR Anon are programs designed for someone who loves an addict.
There are some basic principals that take some time to realize:
1. You are powerless over someone else's addiction.
2. Learn healthy boundaries
3. Ensure you are safe and healthy, whether your loved one is or not.
I hope this helps - please reply if you'd like me to ellaborate.
Fly.
