Hi My Old Friends!!!
How are all of you? Haven't been around regularly in quite a while. I am still sober which is a fete all in itself!! Hooray!!
I went to a wedding this weekend and had a blast. It is the first time in the two years of my sobriety that I have had sober fun. I honestly was beginning to give up hope of having fun sober. I had just resigned myself to a boring existence. People have told me that it is possible to have fun without drinking but I just didn't see it. I do now!!
At first I didn't want to dance and I just sat at the table like a bump on the wall. Everyone looked like they were having such fun out there on the dance floor but in my "alcoholic" mind I thought it was just because they were drinking. I found out later that wasn't the reason. People were having fun because it was a wedding!! Sheesh was a concept!! LOL A couple of people were out there cutting a rug and were the designated drivers. NO Booze!!! How can that be I thought to myself!! lolol Sober fun???? What an oxymoron??? In my mind it was!
Maybe I am turning a corner here! I hope so. I ended up having one of the most fun nights of my life. Drunk or sober. :)
Life is good. To anyone out there that is still struggling to stay sober just take it one day at a time. I do the opposite of what most do with my inner mantras. I don't wake up and say I am not going to drink today. Rather I go to bed at night and do variation on a gratitude prayer for staying sober that day. It works for me. That way if I slipped I didn't go to bed depressed and disappointed in myself. When I did that, I woke up the same way, depressed and disappointed in myself and I had no chance of staying sober that day.
I hope everyone is doing well. Miss you all!! Vw how are things with K?
XX from your old Pal Val!
Hey, Valarie! Welcome back!
Congrats on the wedding fun, too! Sounds like you enjoyed it without becoming the main topic, eh? How'd THAT go? :)
And to actually wake up rather than coming to? Without regret? Good heavens! What'll be next? Spontaneous laughter NOT at someone's expense? Enjoyment? We can only guess!
:)
Isn't it great? Good to "see" you again--and to "hear" you're doing well. Keep coming back and share!!
S
Congrats on the wedding fun, too! Sounds like you enjoyed it without becoming the main topic, eh? How'd THAT go? :)
And to actually wake up rather than coming to? Without regret? Good heavens! What'll be next? Spontaneous laughter NOT at someone's expense? Enjoyment? We can only guess!
:)
Isn't it great? Good to "see" you again--and to "hear" you're doing well. Keep coming back and share!!
S
Hi Skg,
Yep it was nice to wake up and not come to. You have that right! There was a gal who definitely had too much to drink who was crying over in a corner by herself. I felt bad for her because that used to be me. Always drunk and on a crying jag. Usually crying for no reason other than being disappointed in myself. Sheesh I don't miss that at all!
Hope you are doing well!
Yep it was nice to wake up and not come to. You have that right! There was a gal who definitely had too much to drink who was crying over in a corner by herself. I felt bad for her because that used to be me. Always drunk and on a crying jag. Usually crying for no reason other than being disappointed in myself. Sheesh I don't miss that at all!
Hope you are doing well!
Hi Val!!
I get you on the gratitude at night time...I try to do the same and I wake up in the morning refreshed and in good spirits...
I love being able to do things sober and being able to laugh, a real laugh and being able to enjoy myself without having to use any chemicals....I can reflect back now and when I was loaded, all I could ever think about is getting more, staying loaded, insane thoughts through my head but now I get to really enjoy the moments and I'm starting to build positive, joyful memories in place of the shame & guilt I used to remember as memories...
Life is good...recovery is a blessing...I am so glad you checked in and I'm so happy for you as you shine through this post....
Much love,
xoxo
Stacey
I get you on the gratitude at night time...I try to do the same and I wake up in the morning refreshed and in good spirits...
I love being able to do things sober and being able to laugh, a real laugh and being able to enjoy myself without having to use any chemicals....I can reflect back now and when I was loaded, all I could ever think about is getting more, staying loaded, insane thoughts through my head but now I get to really enjoy the moments and I'm starting to build positive, joyful memories in place of the shame & guilt I used to remember as memories...
Life is good...recovery is a blessing...I am so glad you checked in and I'm so happy for you as you shine through this post....
Much love,
xoxo
Stacey
Hi Stacey,
I am glad you are doing well too. I definitely know what you mean about the obsessive thoughts. Never wanting to go anywhere that didn't have booze...wondering how much I could drink without alerting other people of my problem, hiding shots in and around the house and drinking vodka thinking no one could smell it!! LOLOLOL....Being a drunk and staying loaded was definitely a full-time job. I feel like I am retired now and enjoying life!!!
Thanks for the return post. Have a great day!
I am glad you are doing well too. I definitely know what you mean about the obsessive thoughts. Never wanting to go anywhere that didn't have booze...wondering how much I could drink without alerting other people of my problem, hiding shots in and around the house and drinking vodka thinking no one could smell it!! LOLOLOL....Being a drunk and staying loaded was definitely a full-time job. I feel like I am retired now and enjoying life!!!
Thanks for the return post. Have a great day!
"Being a drunk and staying loaded was definitely a full-time job."
That's a new analogy--I'm gonna use it if you don't mind! :)
RE: Crying gal in the corner. Yeah, I'd see her there, too. There was a time I'd try to pick her up, too! ~wink~
I like going to parties and watch the drunks get more stupid over time. It's sad, really, because I can see ME in every one of them. Too vividly, usually.
Good to have you coming 'round again--
S
That's a new analogy--I'm gonna use it if you don't mind! :)
RE: Crying gal in the corner. Yeah, I'd see her there, too. There was a time I'd try to pick her up, too! ~wink~
I like going to parties and watch the drunks get more stupid over time. It's sad, really, because I can see ME in every one of them. Too vividly, usually.
Good to have you coming 'round again--
S
Hi Val good to hear from you, I was wondering how you were doing. I like the line drinking was a full time job and now you are retired. It feels about the same for me. Sometimes I'm not quite sure what to do with myself no that I'm "retired", but it sure beats being drink all the time.
one day at a time, Cookster
one day at a time, Cookster
Gidday Val
Big hugs from NZ and glad to hear you are doing ok and yeah drinking is definitely a full time job and the overtime i done in my head was the killer.
Theres heaps of fun to be had sober and i love groovn on down at any partys because this also helps me not to case the room and see who is buyin, sellin, givin and in oblivion as a part of my addiction keys into these things if i let the radar do a circuit of the room.
Keep posting now and then Val as your brightness is catchy
light and love Zac
Big hugs from NZ and glad to hear you are doing ok and yeah drinking is definitely a full time job and the overtime i done in my head was the killer.
Theres heaps of fun to be had sober and i love groovn on down at any partys because this also helps me not to case the room and see who is buyin, sellin, givin and in oblivion as a part of my addiction keys into these things if i let the radar do a circuit of the room.
Keep posting now and then Val as your brightness is catchy
light and love Zac
Hiya Zac and Cookster!
I hope today is finding you both well. All is well with me. I am anxious to have that kind of fun again. I never thought I could have so much fun sober. It took over 2 years but I finally found the fun again. Now that I know it is possible I probably won't be so shy and inhibited when I get in social situations.
I find that I am alot more shy and don't chat with people like I used to when I was drinking. Hell my phone bill was cut in half. No more drunk dialing! lolol..
Everyone on this board can relate to that one. Never wanting to answer the phone on sundays because you don't remember who you called the night before. I do not miss that at all.
Take care....
I hope today is finding you both well. All is well with me. I am anxious to have that kind of fun again. I never thought I could have so much fun sober. It took over 2 years but I finally found the fun again. Now that I know it is possible I probably won't be so shy and inhibited when I get in social situations.
I find that I am alot more shy and don't chat with people like I used to when I was drinking. Hell my phone bill was cut in half. No more drunk dialing! lolol..
Everyone on this board can relate to that one. Never wanting to answer the phone on sundays because you don't remember who you called the night before. I do not miss that at all.
Take care....
Hey Val, so glad to see you posting....I'm gonna send you an email message. I don't get to the boards that often anymore, lots going on, but I am so grateful to be sober through it all!
