Yeah i know that but i had to type it like that as i can only answer for myself. Hey Jayde it was the right thing to do because we care, we are there in a sense and you need the positive energy that we are all sending you because others around you are trying to sap your energy, God i wish i could type faster as i'm only a 2 finger typist so make a coffee and let your fingers do the talking i'm here and i care
Light and love zac
Hell you type fast in the time i answered you had written another post. have you made a coffee?
Hey there Zac;) Thanks for being here, did you see my last post on this thread?
No i can't drink coffee now, cause i still have to sleep yet;) My H just came in and asked what the hell i was doing up at this time...i just looked at him funny, and he turned around and went back to the couch...(that's his bed, we haven't slept together for over a year. Pretty sad cause we have only been married for a little under 4 yrs.)
No i can't drink coffee now, cause i still have to sleep yet;) My H just came in and asked what the hell i was doing up at this time...i just looked at him funny, and he turned around and went back to the couch...(that's his bed, we haven't slept together for over a year. Pretty sad cause we have only been married for a little under 4 yrs.)
Do you and are you safe in the house with him at the moment? The sleeping arrangments are pa for the course. You deserve to be respected and everyone needs to be loved. Whats your mind racing like at the moment with all that is happening?
Light and love Zac
Light and love Zac
Yeah...i'm as "safe" as i can get here at the moment....we don't fight or raise our voices "usually" with our son here. Maybe that's why we "get it all out" when he's staying with Grandma...i don't know...but that's what it seems like.
My mind is everywhere lately...still trying to let what happened sink in, and soooooooooooooooooooo glad to be out of that little 8' by 10' room! I don't think a cigarette has EVER tasted so good;) (Yeah...that's another bad habit i have, but it beats the hell out of being a drunk, eh? )
My mind is everywhere lately...still trying to let what happened sink in, and soooooooooooooooooooo glad to be out of that little 8' by 10' room! I don't think a cigarette has EVER tasted so good;) (Yeah...that's another bad habit i have, but it beats the hell out of being a drunk, eh? )
Hey don't worry about the ciggies as they can be dealt with later. I only ever smoked when i lived in London because if i had cigges on me then a lady might ask for a light and i ask her to reciprcate with something else. Yes i was the drunk sitting beside you who would say whatever i could to get ya knickers off. I had the morals of a alleycat.
Light and love Zac
Light and love Zac
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Zac YOU ARE KILLING ME;) You are such an awesome guy! Thanks for the laugh....AND the honesty;)
Hey Jayde do you dream at night? can you remember your dreams? Sometimes we can recieve messages in our dreams, positive messages. Before you go to sleep tonight affirm to yourself that yes i am worthwhile and god i am ready to start changing my life for the better. Say the affirmation 3 times. and yes sometimes s*** will still happen but your attitude will change to it. Jayde i hope you have a beautiful sleep and may the fairies of hunting and fishing fill you night with love.
Light and love zac
Light and love zac
Thanks Zac I WILL do that...ya know, it's funny you asked that, because i look forward to sleep because of my dreams. I ALWAYS have the same peaceful dream at some point in the night, and i ALWAYS remember it. I'm living in a beautiful house (that i've never seen before in reality) and there is a blue candle burning in the upstairs bedroom all of the time. I don't know why, but i walk EVERYWHERE i go, and always come home to that beautiful warm blue candle in the window. It's sooo weird that the same dream always happens, but when i'm really sad, i like to take a nap, just so i can go there;)
Nighty night;) J
Nighty night;) J
Hey Jayde next time you have that dream tell yourself to start looking around in the dream and also start looking for the message that will come with this dream and i quarantee that when this happens you will be amazed. And also Jayde don't rule out that one day out walking you might just see the house.
Light and love Zac
Light and love Zac
Ohhh! You just gave me goose bumps;) (Is that what they're called in NZ?) If ya don't know what i mean other terms would be the "hee bee jee bees....made my hair curl;) I know the dream has to mean something because it's always the same place. I tell myself that that's where my son and i are going to be when we start our "new" life;)
Hey Jayde yeah we call them goosebumps and keep that thought alive about living in the house one day. Sorry i took so long to answer as i thought you had gone to beddy byes. Believe in yourself Jayde as you are worth it.
Light and love Zac
Light and love Zac
Hi Jayde
Have you given AA any more thought?
Have you given AA any more thought?
I'm soo thoughtless sometimes! Duh!
VW and Ciaobella, i didn't mean to leave you guys out when i posted early this morning...it's just that i saw Zac was on at the time, so i sorta zeroed him out! Sorry.
I soooo appreciate all the advice and thoughtfulness you have to offer. I know what i need to do, it's just so hard to get started. My mind is still all boggled up from the crap that happened. Valarie i soo apreciate everything you have to say also;) Oh, and 12.....i'm thinkin' about it.
Have a nice day everyone;)
J
VW and Ciaobella, i didn't mean to leave you guys out when i posted early this morning...it's just that i saw Zac was on at the time, so i sorta zeroed him out! Sorry.
I soooo appreciate all the advice and thoughtfulness you have to offer. I know what i need to do, it's just so hard to get started. My mind is still all boggled up from the crap that happened. Valarie i soo apreciate everything you have to say also;) Oh, and 12.....i'm thinkin' about it.
Have a nice day everyone;)
J
Jayde, In my marriage, things would calm down for a bit...then wham, it started up again and usually another incident happened that was worse than before...remember the disease is progressive. I lived in so much fear of the unknown that I just couldn't leave (he always threatened me), it actually took my oldest daughter saying something like, we gotta go, we gotta go less he'll never get better ~ it's so sad when I think about it...but besides getting sober that was one of the best decision I made leaving him (I was suppose to be in Mediation Court with him this morning but the he cancelled, gee what a surprise, I'm still going over to the courthouse to reschedule this session, and see if the Mediator has a few minutes to chat). I wish you all the luck
OMG!!! I AM dense! Love-dove, i'm soooo sorry, I meant to thank you too! Geez...i need more help than i thought! I sent you an email last night too....did ya get it?
Hey VW! Hope everything works out good for you today. It's cool you get the day off though huh? Yep...that's how it is here too. s*** happens then it calms waaayyy down for awhile and then BAM...something real bad happens again. It sorta makes me nervous when things are going too smoothly, because i know it don't last too long. This time though...he skipped the a** kissing phase all together.
Hey VW! Hope everything works out good for you today. It's cool you get the day off though huh? Yep...that's how it is here too. s*** happens then it calms waaayyy down for awhile and then BAM...something real bad happens again. It sorta makes me nervous when things are going too smoothly, because i know it don't last too long. This time though...he skipped the a** kissing phase all together.
Jayde, thanks for that...sometimes I would just feel like a hamster on that little wheel that they perpetually run on in their cage...I could never jump off...again the best thing I did for my situation was leave...I believe it saved both of our lives, and I mean that down to the core...he has even said that to me, he got remarried shortly after the divorce was final...I could've never been happier, cause I was paying him alimony and it stopped when he got married, and also him calling me and harassing me stopped too ~ now he's someone else's problem.
Hey Jayde, no worries, I didn't see it as being left out really, just saw your post and wanted to post to you... anyway I'm unable to post from home right now as my computer is a piece of crap and internet doesn't work, so it's only when I get a breather at work that I can pop in. But good to see you back and hope you're feeling better...
Hey there Jayde, I didn't receive your email, just to confirm it's emc1850@telus.net Hope you are having a good day. I'm going poolside for a little bit, need to cool down, and it sure is a huge stress reliever. Normally I would be reaching for the coldest beer around right now!
Lots of love
Liz :)
Lots of love
Liz :)
Google safe homes for domestic violence...keep refining the search there is help...just a question do you know Indy? Confused.
Hey Jayde,
Hows things going?
I havent had much internet access the last 2 days, Im staying down in a small town for the weekend, its a cool biker town My sorta town!!
Hope you are safe!!!!!!!
Will email ya when i get a chance,(im in a libary using the net at the moment!
Take care Ginge
PS Gidday Zac hows it going I had a txt from Fing this morning I see we won the Bledisloe!!! Hey I win either way oz or kiwi!!!
Like i said to Jayde away on a bit of break for the weekend, will fill you in when I ring Take care man Ginge
Hows things going?
I havent had much internet access the last 2 days, Im staying down in a small town for the weekend, its a cool biker town My sorta town!!
Hope you are safe!!!!!!!
Will email ya when i get a chance,(im in a libary using the net at the moment!
Take care Ginge
PS Gidday Zac hows it going I had a txt from Fing this morning I see we won the Bledisloe!!! Hey I win either way oz or kiwi!!!
Like i said to Jayde away on a bit of break for the weekend, will fill you in when I ring Take care man Ginge
