Cowgirl, Roxy, Molly, Soccormom, anyone and everyone,
I guess you read my post fom lortab loser , i've fallen off the wagon-posted 2/7/07 @ 1:06am pgs 1&2 thats the basics of my deal, where do i go now? thats why i went with home wrecker! my wife/girlfriend is being cool, i'm afraid a little to cool. like when the time is right shes gone. she cant leave our boy or the house its in her name, of course my credit is screwed.I wish I could snap my fingers and take away the lies!! The drugs I'll be stonger for it but the lies will hurt forever. sometimes she will tell me she loves melike when we go to work, most times i say i love you & she says bye.it is selfish but it hurts me to feel alone! I just want my best friend back, I've told her that nothing back to normal just a hug, tell me thats good,when I make a good choice or show improvement. I told her i was truly sorry but i'm not beating that in the ground, she doesn't believe anything i say now anyway.thanks for all your good advice and support about a week clean, the craving is the worst just ease the mental pain!
HI HW
What are you going to do differently to make sure you don't relapse again? Are you in counseling? AA? NA? Church? Have you done anything besides just stop putting pills in your mouth? I went to a training session last week on recovery and our chances of staying off drugs or booze without outside help are very, very slim. I would post the percentages but I don't have them with me. Even with treatment our chances are slim so without anything our chances are next to nothing. This isn't my opinion, this is from studies done by some treatment center in Chicago. I am sure if your wife/gf saw you doing something about your addiction she would begin to trust you more in time. Everything takes time. Good luck and keep coming back.
What are you going to do differently to make sure you don't relapse again? Are you in counseling? AA? NA? Church? Have you done anything besides just stop putting pills in your mouth? I went to a training session last week on recovery and our chances of staying off drugs or booze without outside help are very, very slim. I would post the percentages but I don't have them with me. Even with treatment our chances are slim so without anything our chances are next to nothing. This isn't my opinion, this is from studies done by some treatment center in Chicago. I am sure if your wife/gf saw you doing something about your addiction she would begin to trust you more in time. Everything takes time. Good luck and keep coming back.
HW,
She probably wants her best friend back, too, and you weren't it when drugs were your new best friend. But you can't do anything about that now. All you can do is let your wife see that you are making concrete positive changes. Over time, as you get stronger, maybe she will regain trust. Even if she never does, at least you'll still be stronger.
Do you have any F2F support? A therapist, a sponsor, a minister? AA meetings are free and you could probably find at least three to attend today, depending on where you live.
It really isn't just about stopping using. Get help and learn to use tools other than drugs to get through life.
Good luck,
Gina
| QUOTE |
| I just want my best friend back |
She probably wants her best friend back, too, and you weren't it when drugs were your new best friend. But you can't do anything about that now. All you can do is let your wife see that you are making concrete positive changes. Over time, as you get stronger, maybe she will regain trust. Even if she never does, at least you'll still be stronger.
Do you have any F2F support? A therapist, a sponsor, a minister? AA meetings are free and you could probably find at least three to attend today, depending on where you live.
It really isn't just about stopping using. Get help and learn to use tools other than drugs to get through life.
Good luck,
Gina
HW.First 7 foremost..FORGIVE yourself.You cannot take back whats been done.Please know when I say what Im about to it comes from a place of caring.
I understand your feelings about gaining trust back,getting your best friend back(that brought tears to me)I do understand BUT you need to think of YOU right now & what YOU need to do to improve your life.Without you being healed you may not have anything to offer her.
I say this because I know,I didnt just let my BF down but also 2 beautiful daughters over & over & I see it in thier eyes they still at times think Im going to go back to that shell I use to be.
I suggest getting to a therapist.
Its hard hard work & you may have to walk through hell before its over but NEVER STOP TRYING!!!
That may help show your love that you are truley wanting a better life for the 3 of you.
As for "slipping up"we all have at one time or another.BUT if you keep dwelling on that you may get stuck there.As long as theres a new day theres always another chance.
Hold on & DONT GIVE UP
molly
I understand your feelings about gaining trust back,getting your best friend back(that brought tears to me)I do understand BUT you need to think of YOU right now & what YOU need to do to improve your life.Without you being healed you may not have anything to offer her.
I say this because I know,I didnt just let my BF down but also 2 beautiful daughters over & over & I see it in thier eyes they still at times think Im going to go back to that shell I use to be.
I suggest getting to a therapist.
Its hard hard work & you may have to walk through hell before its over but NEVER STOP TRYING!!!
That may help show your love that you are truley wanting a better life for the 3 of you.
As for "slipping up"we all have at one time or another.BUT if you keep dwelling on that you may get stuck there.As long as theres a new day theres always another chance.
Hold on & DONT GIVE UP
molly
Gina I just wanted to say how very true.For the longest time I thought being on Sub & not abusing ment I was in recovery.How blind I was.Ive been in therapy now for alittle over 2 mths & OMGOODNESS I can feel the difference inside of me.
I always said stopping the drugs were the easy part,living without them???Thats the life long battle.
Thank you for wording it better than I could!!!
molly
I always said stopping the drugs were the easy part,living without them???Thats the life long battle.
Thank you for wording it better than I could!!!
molly
Molls,
You worded it just fine yourself. If we all say the same thing in different ways, then maybe the message will get through to someone. There is hope. Life is better in recovery.
I'm so very pleased that therapy is helping you. I know it has changed my life -- or rather, the way I look at my life, which probably amounts to the same thing.
Have a great day!
Love,
Gina
You worded it just fine yourself. If we all say the same thing in different ways, then maybe the message will get through to someone. There is hope. Life is better in recovery.
I'm so very pleased that therapy is helping you. I know it has changed my life -- or rather, the way I look at my life, which probably amounts to the same thing.
Have a great day!
Love,
Gina
