Hey cowgirl.....did I see you are from Washington....as in Seattle............my 19 yo lives in bremerton.I grew up there.........moved to Calif. to get rid of the web toes...........LMAO but it beautiful there
I actually live about 20 minutes from Bremerton! Is he in the navy?
You are pulling yourself apart. I know it's hard but can't be you so I can't say I u'stand every thing you're going through. You are really so hard on yourself. I know we all can be but you more than others really give yourself a hard time.
If you are so upset you did the pills and don't think you did them for the right reason, then okay, yeah, that's the wrong thing to do and you know it.
Should you persetute yourself for doing that - no - if you keep doing it like we were doing it, then start beating up on yourself.
You don't like these pills and you don't feel like you can take them for pain only.
I get that. Can you live with the pain? Mine is bad and yours last a lot longer than mine does.
You need to try a pain Management office - I have done those in my 30's - I don't think I put as much into them as I could have. Masage, therapy to try and divert the thoughts of your pain, I laughed at the relaxation tape they gave me. That was the 1st days of the pain. I have pulled that out and listened to it again, didn't help but may work for you. PT, exercise. I know you are good at making yourself get up and get out even when in bad pain.
We know water exercise is the best we can do for our pain, better than pain pills. I know you do this sometimes.
Sweetie, these ar just ideas b/c I don't have even some of the answers. I just want your pain to be tolerable and you to feel better about yourself. Stop beating up on yourself.
Love you,
Jean
Pam,
Thank you for info. I'm a tax prep so I need all help I can get. The 2 I have filed who had lawsuit proceeds, for some reason, they were also completely different lawsuits, I called the IRS, wrote the IRS and printed from their website and Turbo Tax info where this money wasn't taxable and included a copy w/taxes to mail and attached to person's copy. Just in case, it spelled it out more on the program I think most use now - Turbo Tax. The only thing when I started and did by hand, made me think more and brain worked better. This program does it all for you. So, when it's s'thing comes up out of the ordinary, I call and write and read Tubo tax numerous times b/c one call to the IRS, well, I will say, I have gotten 3 different answers to the same question in past years.
Thanks, I'll know to keep reading, I love it but would die if I messed up s'ones money. My saying is "I'd rather mess up our taxes than clients" My husband says, hey - wait a minute!
haha
Love, Jean
If you are so upset you did the pills and don't think you did them for the right reason, then okay, yeah, that's the wrong thing to do and you know it.
Should you persetute yourself for doing that - no - if you keep doing it like we were doing it, then start beating up on yourself.
You don't like these pills and you don't feel like you can take them for pain only.
I get that. Can you live with the pain? Mine is bad and yours last a lot longer than mine does.
You need to try a pain Management office - I have done those in my 30's - I don't think I put as much into them as I could have. Masage, therapy to try and divert the thoughts of your pain, I laughed at the relaxation tape they gave me. That was the 1st days of the pain. I have pulled that out and listened to it again, didn't help but may work for you. PT, exercise. I know you are good at making yourself get up and get out even when in bad pain.
We know water exercise is the best we can do for our pain, better than pain pills. I know you do this sometimes.
Sweetie, these ar just ideas b/c I don't have even some of the answers. I just want your pain to be tolerable and you to feel better about yourself. Stop beating up on yourself.
Love you,
Jean
Pam,
Thank you for info. I'm a tax prep so I need all help I can get. The 2 I have filed who had lawsuit proceeds, for some reason, they were also completely different lawsuits, I called the IRS, wrote the IRS and printed from their website and Turbo Tax info where this money wasn't taxable and included a copy w/taxes to mail and attached to person's copy. Just in case, it spelled it out more on the program I think most use now - Turbo Tax. The only thing when I started and did by hand, made me think more and brain worked better. This program does it all for you. So, when it's s'thing comes up out of the ordinary, I call and write and read Tubo tax numerous times b/c one call to the IRS, well, I will say, I have gotten 3 different answers to the same question in past years.
Thanks, I'll know to keep reading, I love it but would die if I messed up s'ones money. My saying is "I'd rather mess up our taxes than clients" My husband says, hey - wait a minute!
haha
Love, Jean
Oh Jean, don't worry about messing up anyone's taxes..........Ignorance on your clients part is no excuse and this holds the same in a court of law. People have got to learn to take responsiblity for their own actions. I'm more than positive that you keep up with all of the accounting and tax information that you can. The case that I was talking about was kind of unique, but the money would have been taxed as wages had the attorney not worded a few things just the right way.............They have to be tricky with those wordings.........and I heard him tell his client that he was not a tax attorney and that they sould consult with one or their accountant..............just to be safe. Now, the inheritance, you hit that one dead on...........no pun intended........ but my family has had two estates that we have closed out this year and there was big bucks involved in these estates so that is how I learned about this one. My hubby's uncle passed away while on holiday in Ireland about 3 years ago and he never married and never had kids so my husband and hubby's brother were the only living heirs and then before we could close out Uncle's estate. Brother N Law got killed in February, so we got another estated dumped in our laps... What really sucked, is we had just sold uncle's house and closed on a Friday and my brother n law got killed two days later on a Sunday. He never got to see a dime of the money from the sale of the house. The closing was late Friday afternoon and then he was leaving for Mardi Gras on Sunday and going to pick his check up when he got back into town and needless to say, he didn't make it 1 mile from his home when he was killed. He was in a motorcycle wreck and died pretty much instantly, the wreck crushed his chest and he was only 48 years old..........Never married and had no children either......... Take Care and have a great day........
Sharon, don't beat yourself up. I am not saying that pills are the way, and oh it is okay honey, you had a bad day, take another.
You realized that it was old behaviors (that's huge...took me a while to get around to that one) and also realized that you don't want to be resigned to a life of narcotics.
This too shall pass....I promise. You can get through this. And, medical and money when that is all you have is big.....some may not understand, but I am gona lose my medical of 10 years at the end of this month. I understand how scary and huge that is.
Keep your chin up......and you will survive this.
Kerry
You realized that it was old behaviors (that's huge...took me a while to get around to that one) and also realized that you don't want to be resigned to a life of narcotics.
This too shall pass....I promise. You can get through this. And, medical and money when that is all you have is big.....some may not understand, but I am gona lose my medical of 10 years at the end of this month. I understand how scary and huge that is.
Keep your chin up......and you will survive this.
Kerry
Dear Pam:
I can't help but feel responsible for these people (their taxes) , some are really not very smart about their finances, even though most are smart people.
I am so sorry you have had so many tragidies recently.
One thing I picked up on in your words, it is a job. My Father-in-Law died almost 3 years ago and my husbamd was the Executor (they have another name for it now, just remembered - Personal Rep)
It was work, I tried to help - he has 3 siblings and I know one sister thought he was going to take the money and run. Made me mad but I stayed out of it other than to say how hard he was working on getting all of the p'work done, his other sister, we knew could have used her part.
My in-laws divorce was final 3 days before my sweet Father-in-Law got sick - for the 3 years before he died. He gave her a paid off house in the divorce settlement and money so he left e'thing in his estate and life ins to the 4 children. My husband likes to spend money but you know this is a different kind of money. It's not easy to think of it as fun money. He wouldn't even take for himself the Executor fee that he could have done - I felt he deserved it, b/c of all of his work but like I say, his family, his business.
Again, I am so sorry. It is really sad for someone to receive an inheritance and not be able to enjoy it. I'm sure the uncle was loved but it seems it would be a little easier to spend that money than a parent or someone even closer.
Not minimizing the love for the uncle at all when I say that.
I just wanted to let you know I could read in your words that it is not a fun thing to do. My husband says he refuses to do his Mother's when that day comes. The other 2 siblings trusted him completely - he offered at any time for all of them to come over and examine p'work.
His Mother will not change her will and it says if David's Father pre-deseases her which happened, David will be the one but he says he can appoint his brother. I have re-typed our will a couple of times over the last 20 years and it does say s'thing about if the Personal Rep cannot fulfill his/her responsibilities, they can appoint someone else.
Love, it's fun to talk with someone who has been through this kind of stuff.
Jean
Dear Kerry, I love "This too, shall pas"
I read that during my W/D's - b/c you think sometimes you will be horrible and sick and brain damaged forever.
That helped me - and it did pass. I hope Sharon will read into that.
Love, Jean
I read that during my W/D's - b/c you think sometimes you will be horrible and sick and brain damaged forever.
That helped me - and it did pass. I hope Sharon will read into that.
Love, Jean
Jeff:
$250,000 is a ton of money - but it's too late now for Sharon to beat herself up about it. I'm sure she's already done that so what's your point? What we all should have done is not relevant. Wouldn'r we change a lot of things if we could go back, this being a recovery board? She can't go back and get a couple of attorneys to make sure she gets the right answer this time so she has to find a way to get through this and this is not a good time to deal with it.
I know I could deal with a huge problem like this had I not just stopped pain pills and still trying to stop and still having the pain. It's hard to think clearly when you are in chronic pain.
So, it's gone, she knows she would have done it differently now. She thought the attorney knew what he was talking about, a lot of people do. They are attorneys, if they don't know for sure, they should refer clients to another.
Just no reason to beat herself up now, she's got enough going on.
Jean
$250,000 is a ton of money - but it's too late now for Sharon to beat herself up about it. I'm sure she's already done that so what's your point? What we all should have done is not relevant. Wouldn'r we change a lot of things if we could go back, this being a recovery board? She can't go back and get a couple of attorneys to make sure she gets the right answer this time so she has to find a way to get through this and this is not a good time to deal with it.
I know I could deal with a huge problem like this had I not just stopped pain pills and still trying to stop and still having the pain. It's hard to think clearly when you are in chronic pain.
So, it's gone, she knows she would have done it differently now. She thought the attorney knew what he was talking about, a lot of people do. They are attorneys, if they don't know for sure, they should refer clients to another.
Just no reason to beat herself up now, she's got enough going on.
Jean
Jean all I am saying is without knowing all the details is for Sharon to call an Accountant. Not a lawyer. Not about beating herself up. I have no idea what she did with the money.But there are ways of writing off certain things.
I am not an accountant. I am suggesting she seek advice. There are many free services offerered to help people with IRS /Tax problems.
I am not judging her--trying to help.
If the money is gone its gone
Jeff
P.S Jean attorneys suck and if your lucky in life you never need one. But when it comes to $$$ you seek an accountant who is conservative who will invest the $$ and make sure the person has the correct type of Insurance.
Never make the same mistake twice.
I am not an accountant. I am suggesting she seek advice. There are many free services offerered to help people with IRS /Tax problems.
I am not judging her--trying to help.
If the money is gone its gone
Jeff
P.S Jean attorneys suck and if your lucky in life you never need one. But when it comes to $$$ you seek an accountant who is conservative who will invest the $$ and make sure the person has the correct type of Insurance.
Never make the same mistake twice.
Sharon,
I'm so sorry that life has thrown you another curveball, just when you don't need it. Don't panic. Don't beat yourself up. You can't change the past.
I don't know which gov't agency you've run afoul of, but I don't think they're out to get you. They just want "their" money back. In any case, you'll need help from the experts. I wouldn't face these guys without the help of an accountant or tax lawyer.
Love,
Gina
I'm so sorry that life has thrown you another curveball, just when you don't need it. Don't panic. Don't beat yourself up. You can't change the past.
I don't know which gov't agency you've run afoul of, but I don't think they're out to get you. They just want "their" money back. In any case, you'll need help from the experts. I wouldn't face these guys without the help of an accountant or tax lawyer.
Love,
Gina
Good Morning Jean, yes being the Personal Representative is a tough job and like your husband, mine refused to accept payment for the work that he did. His Mother also passed away about 5 years ago and it hasn't been very long since we closed out her Estate too.......... That is a ton of dang work.......Thank God, there was only him and his brother so there was no bickering between the two of them. They both did well in life and did not need the money and properties that they received. Oh yeah, I told you that my brother n law was not married and didn't have children. Yeah, this is true.........For years we thought that he was married and getting a divorce at the time of his death. We knew for a fact that he never had children. Well honey, we just found out, when appointed as personal representative of his Estate, that he was NOT married and only lived with the woman all of these years.........hehehehe,,,,,,, he pulled a good one on us.......He was really private and sneaky, that little stinker.....Anyhow, his paramour's children are grown now and my husband did not leave her empty handed. After all, she did spend many years with him and even though they were seperated, she did still love him. I'm proud of my husband for not being greedy and for taking care of who we thought for years was our sister n law..........lol........
Take Care and have a great day and weekend. By the way, how is little Max doing in the contest? Sorry I haven't looked at it today but I will be going to vote in just a minute.
Take Care and have a great day and weekend. By the way, how is little Max doing in the contest? Sorry I haven't looked at it today but I will be going to vote in just a minute.
Jeff:
We do so agree - attorneys suck big time.
I know 100% of them don't (maybe 99%) but the dealings we have heard of within the family, they were just out for themselves and making a settlement. Do attorneys do no litigtaion except the TV ones? haha
We heard all of the detals of my b-in-law who a doctor just as well killed his Father. I think doctors and lawyers stick together, too. This was an airtight case, my b-in-law was driven, not for the money but he had a nervous breakdown when his Father died so he wanted justice.
Airtight case, those were the attorney's words, but when they explained to us, it seemed that way, too. The attorney honestly got mad at them for not settleing, they wanted to take it to court so this doctor's mistake would be a matter of public record. They won but it was less than the settlement. I think juries are thinking that people, in general are becoming lawsuit happy. Maybe the attorney knew this and was trying to get more money for them and himself but they said he was such a poor litagator, they were surprised they even won. My b-in-law was still happy that this came out, was in the open. I know doctors make mistakes but I'm sure when it's your family, you want the world to know that this man made a big-time mistake.
Lawyers are bad. haha Hope I never have to deal with them.
Jean
We do so agree - attorneys suck big time.
I know 100% of them don't (maybe 99%) but the dealings we have heard of within the family, they were just out for themselves and making a settlement. Do attorneys do no litigtaion except the TV ones? haha
We heard all of the detals of my b-in-law who a doctor just as well killed his Father. I think doctors and lawyers stick together, too. This was an airtight case, my b-in-law was driven, not for the money but he had a nervous breakdown when his Father died so he wanted justice.
Airtight case, those were the attorney's words, but when they explained to us, it seemed that way, too. The attorney honestly got mad at them for not settleing, they wanted to take it to court so this doctor's mistake would be a matter of public record. They won but it was less than the settlement. I think juries are thinking that people, in general are becoming lawsuit happy. Maybe the attorney knew this and was trying to get more money for them and himself but they said he was such a poor litagator, they were surprised they even won. My b-in-law was still happy that this came out, was in the open. I know doctors make mistakes but I'm sure when it's your family, you want the world to know that this man made a big-time mistake.
Lawyers are bad. haha Hope I never have to deal with them.
Jean
My goals are small..to get through a day w/o pain that I cannot control with OTC meds..that is all I want.I came clean about the spent $$, drugs..what more can I do? I'm not the first and I won't be the last to make an a** of myself..at least I am willing to pull myself out of the hole of despaid mark my words,I will. ALL my Drs. areon the same page as far as my pain issues are concerned..they all are justifying controlled pill use..there's only one problem..I was doing fine before that damned colonoscopy and I needed nothing but advil..So, why should I accept a life of drugs..I WILL get back to the way I was..I am determined to not let pills run mylife...this is what I want...I believe it is possible....but as I sit here in pain, I also know to take one day at a time..Love,S(Jean,Sorry I called so late...you were in bed)
Jean Wed I had to take an EKG chest Xrauy and blood work just for a minor operations.
WHY?
Due to all these lawyers filing bogus cases againstthe doctors and hospitals.
A man walked into a tavern and sat next to a good looking,
smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool.
"Hi there good looking, how's it going?" he asked.
The woman looked him straight in the eye and said, "Listen,
I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place,
it doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college,
and I just love it!"
"No kidding?," said the man, "What firm are you with?
I'm a lawyer too!"
This says it all about lawyers
Jeff
WHY?
Due to all these lawyers filing bogus cases againstthe doctors and hospitals.
A man walked into a tavern and sat next to a good looking,
smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool.
"Hi there good looking, how's it going?" he asked.
The woman looked him straight in the eye and said, "Listen,
I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place,
it doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college,
and I just love it!"
"No kidding?," said the man, "What firm are you with?
I'm a lawyer too!"
This says it all about lawyers
Jeff
Jeff:
You need to post that one day when we are posting some jokes.
That is not only a joke but a true story - haha
Love, Jean
You need to post that one day when we are posting some jokes.
That is not only a joke but a true story - haha
Love, Jean
Hey, sharonn, just wanted to touch base here and let you know I'm thinking good thoughts for you.
You do have this going for you: you're on top of things, you know what you're doing, you are self-aware, you still have great insight into yourself. So all is not lost.
James
You do have this going for you: you're on top of things, you know what you're doing, you are self-aware, you still have great insight into yourself. So all is not lost.
James
Thanks, James..I feel for you with the pain issue..Life is not fair..low-dose Elavil has helped me with the fibro..your stage 4(dep) sleep improves ans as a result, your body is more able to repair itself...less pain..no magic bullet(we addicts want instant gratification)....have you ever tried it? Some side effects, constipation, weight gain..minor on a small dose..not a therapeutic dose for depression(25 mgs./under) but my mood was definitely better...take care...Love,Sharonn
Sharonn, as a matter of fact I did use elavil for a few years to improve my sleep. Once I started abusing pain pills, I quit on the elavil, though. Didn't need it, if you know what I mean. Nothing like an overdose of opiates to make you snooze good.
And now that I'm off pain pills, I finally sleep a normal sleep, other than the pain in my hip I'm currently experiencing. To be honest, the pain in my hip is drowning out any noise made by my FM.
And now that I'm off pain pills, I finally sleep a normal sleep, other than the pain in my hip I'm currently experiencing. To be honest, the pain in my hip is drowning out any noise made by my FM.
Sorry James..does the lidocaine patch work at all? What is the plan for your hip? Good grief..so much suffering!!!Love,S
