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am gunna be 40 very soon and i cannot go on with this life i am living. i have a heroin addiction and i cant seem to find the inner strength to stop it.i have what i thin is a fairly small habit. i am also on a methadon script thru my local drug n alcohol treartment cntr.they have ( quite rightly) put me on a 4 wee plan as i have never given a clean sample. i have been usin ontop since day 1. i now spend every last penny i get thru benefits on this stuff- i have to often go out shoplifting to eep the money coming in-i will go to prison if i get caught- surely this shud be a reson to quit- b have ut its not- i still doing it even when i have promised myself i wont. i am having a real hard time with my parner who is also addicted to heroin.he lays in bed whilst i out shoplifting to get cash to buy heroin for me n him.when i have the drug in my hand i feel 'well' my boyfriend is very volitile and is continuously saying how much he hates me n how sic he is of looing at me (note -he only horrid after i have given him my earnings) i resent him so bad that it all errupted here early this wee n he has gone bac to mummys in another town 30 mins away he has left me with not 1p he new i have nothing n he i believe purposely changed our benfit payment account to his mummys therefor i have not money till next tues i have the whole weeend to go with nothing but a few valium i cud sell or i bac out shoplifing to buy drugs- why ? because i need them? i so scared or rattling. i cant do this alone i am stuc in a seaside town with not many english people so the only people i meet r users or driners sitting in a par and u r never far away from a dealer sending u messages planting that seed. i need a plan i have limited my intae to 1 bag per day wich i gunna have in the mornings as it a habit that i wae early every morning for a hit then go b to sleep- maybe tomorrow i will try taing my methadon first- i have been got myself sum boos to read cos it gunna be one long boring weeend no money . no-one to chat to i am panicing now !!!!ld find that inspirin so if u guys now any additional reading material pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese let me now - will try to enter a blog every day so i can trac my progree
has anyone read any good heroin addicts diary where u seem they eventually clean i wou
i dont really no how to start- i
The first thing to do is to accept that you have a problem, if you keep denying that you are fine. You'll definitely not going to pass through this. You've seen how life is miserable when you're addicted. Its not enough to promise else you should really must fight the cravings and other symptoms. Go to some medical professional that can help you recover. Your not alone. And when you started and feel like quitting again always tell yourself your goals and imagine your life ahead your success recovery.
Dont be afraid. I wish you well.
Dont be afraid. I wish you well.
