I am involved in a new relationship with a man that has had a previous experience with pain killer addictions. He has chronic back pain and requires medications, but doesn't receive the medication from a doctor. He was in rehabilitation for the addiction a couple times and swears to be addiction free. First of all, he still takes percocet, ultram, oxycotin, and who knows what else for his back, but what bothers me the most is he takes these pills nasally. He swears it doesn't give him a buzz, but it's common knowledge that it does. He has hook ups in his home town and is capable of getting any kind of medication he wants. I'm worried that he is still addicted to pain killers and what I should do to get him help?? Is there anything I can do?? Whenever I bring the subject up about the pills he takes, he gets defensive and aggressive towards me. Is this a bad thing?? I'm not aware of these kind of situations, so I feel totally helpless.......Can someone please help me?????
If he is snorting oxys, he is VERY much addicted.... VERY much addicted
Regards,
Tom
Regards,
Tom
tom is soooooooooooo right, he is abusing them meds. there is also nothing you can do to help him but either stay and get educated on addiction and go to alanon if you choose to be with this man. or B) make a decision on what you really want to deal with and how you really want to spend the rest of your life dealing with his addiction. addiction effects many others not just the addict. only he can choose when its time for him to be serious and quit. untill then all you can do is pray. it will do no good to continue talking to him regarding the matter. it has to come from with in himself. good luck and i will keep you in my prayers.
terrianne
terrianne
Let me see if I can help you........I know just where you are coming from. My husband was addicted to pain pills and then jumped to herion......
There really isn't anything that you can do for him. He has to want to get clean for him....This is a terrible disease, one not easily understood. There are somethings you can do though that will help you to deal with whats going on....
First these important words.....
You can't cure him.....
You didn't cause this........
And you have no control.......
Now with that out there you have to learn to take care of you and put you first......I know it sounds horrible but trust me this disease takes the addict and thier loved ones also.......It is vicious, I know I watched it strip my husband away little by little and there was nothing I could do to help him. He had to want it....your bf will have to want it too....doesn't sound like he is ready snorting oxy's means he upped the anti........taking them orally wasn't working anymore he couldn't get the high he was searching for.....If you plan to stay in this relationship you need to find some support for yourself, or will lose the best of you in the worry, the lies, the heartache, the insanity......that comes with disease......You have to not react, take care of you first, never put your life on hold for him, never lie for him, never enable or tolerate bad behavior.....There are many posts on the Friends and Family board that can help you cope.
I will be on for a bit if you have any questions...........
This isn't an easy thing to live with.....I wish you all the best and will keep both of you in my prayers.....
Love,
Tina
There really isn't anything that you can do for him. He has to want to get clean for him....This is a terrible disease, one not easily understood. There are somethings you can do though that will help you to deal with whats going on....
First these important words.....
You can't cure him.....
You didn't cause this........
And you have no control.......
Now with that out there you have to learn to take care of you and put you first......I know it sounds horrible but trust me this disease takes the addict and thier loved ones also.......It is vicious, I know I watched it strip my husband away little by little and there was nothing I could do to help him. He had to want it....your bf will have to want it too....doesn't sound like he is ready snorting oxy's means he upped the anti........taking them orally wasn't working anymore he couldn't get the high he was searching for.....If you plan to stay in this relationship you need to find some support for yourself, or will lose the best of you in the worry, the lies, the heartache, the insanity......that comes with disease......You have to not react, take care of you first, never put your life on hold for him, never lie for him, never enable or tolerate bad behavior.....There are many posts on the Friends and Family board that can help you cope.
I will be on for a bit if you have any questions...........
This isn't an easy thing to live with.....I wish you all the best and will keep both of you in my prayers.....
Love,
Tina
Once an addict, always an addict. We are never addiction free.
He's kidding you and himself. If he needs those pain meds legit, then he should be under a dr's care.
You can't help him, he has to do that himself, you can gently point him in the right directions but it's got to come from him.
A relationship with this man is going to be a tough one, trust and honesty issues are always going to be hard. If he's worth it, than tell him you'll help him get help but you won't stick around to watch him die. And snorting narcotics is a pretty quick way to accomplish just that.
Good luck, darlin, you and he are going to need it.
Cowgirl
He's kidding you and himself. If he needs those pain meds legit, then he should be under a dr's care.
You can't help him, he has to do that himself, you can gently point him in the right directions but it's got to come from him.
A relationship with this man is going to be a tough one, trust and honesty issues are always going to be hard. If he's worth it, than tell him you'll help him get help but you won't stick around to watch him die. And snorting narcotics is a pretty quick way to accomplish just that.
Good luck, darlin, you and he are going to need it.
Cowgirl
