How do you know if you're a good candidate for the 12 steps?
I'm 28, and I've been addicted to vicodin (or loracet if I couldn't get vicodin) for over a year. Actually, to be honest I've been taking them for almost 3 years, but I was up to between 15 and 30 a day for the past year. I'm addicted and I'm trying to stop. Today, Tuesday the 2nd, is my 5th day off pills.
I'm completely comitted to quitting. I've changed my phone number so that my dealer couldn't call me any more, I've gone to buy the OTC list you guys recommended, and I've spent 5 days in bed trying to kick these withdrawals. I'm not going back to pills now, not ever.
Tomorrow is my first pills anonymous meeting, and I'm really worried about what they're going to think of me, and what to expect.
My Brother and Mother go to AA meetings (alcoholics anonymous) and it's changed their lives. I'm impressed with the 12 steps, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to do them without letting everyone down.
I'm scared that I won't do good and that the relationship I have with God will suffer because I'm weak. I've been praying so much since I quit last week, but I'm scared that God hasn't forgiven me because it's only been 5 days, and I ignored him for the entire year I was using.
I feel so bad and so scared that I'll never be able to come back and make up for what I've done.
I don't think I'll go back to pills, I really don't. I don't have a connection to it anymore now that my dealer is out of my life, and also because I just want so badly to be who I used to be, know what I mean?
I have to thank you all for reading my posts and giving me support, I can't tell you how much you've all helped me and inspired me. I'm so glad there's a place like this I can come to and share my pain, it helps me feel not so alone.
Feelin' strong.
Westwind(feelin' strong) Congratulations on your first 5 days,youve made it through some of the vrey worst days! That is quite an accomplishment and speaks very strongly about your desire to stay clean.
Ive never been to a PA meeting but im sure you are going to fit right in.Nobody will have any expectsations of you.You speak/contribute at your own pace,but most of all you'll listen and learn! Learn youre not alone in your way of thinking,in your fears,your hopes and desires.
God forgives all,you neednt worry about that.Youre taking all the right steps to get your life back,im so very happy for you and happy that youve found our little family here,it is nice to have a place like this to come to.But the outside meetings,the face to face stuff will be even more important to your recovery.I look forward to hearing how it goes.Keep us updated.Take care~KIM
Ive never been to a PA meeting but im sure you are going to fit right in.Nobody will have any expectsations of you.You speak/contribute at your own pace,but most of all you'll listen and learn! Learn youre not alone in your way of thinking,in your fears,your hopes and desires.
God forgives all,you neednt worry about that.Youre taking all the right steps to get your life back,im so very happy for you and happy that youve found our little family here,it is nice to have a place like this to come to.But the outside meetings,the face to face stuff will be even more important to your recovery.I look forward to hearing how it goes.Keep us updated.Take care~KIM
WW:
I think it's awesome that you are going to attend a PA meeting. I believe willingness to do things differently is the key. Being open to meetings is a step in the right direction. There is a sense of peace and serenity I get when I go to meetings. I learn about taking action in my recovery and I also learn there is a solution to dealing with life on life's terms sans drugs. For me, when I sit in a meeting, I feel a sense of being able to exhale. I believe that surrendering and admitting that our lives had become unmanageable is very freeing. Good luck to you.
~Rachel
I think it's awesome that you are going to attend a PA meeting. I believe willingness to do things differently is the key. Being open to meetings is a step in the right direction. There is a sense of peace and serenity I get when I go to meetings. I learn about taking action in my recovery and I also learn there is a solution to dealing with life on life's terms sans drugs. For me, when I sit in a meeting, I feel a sense of being able to exhale. I believe that surrendering and admitting that our lives had become unmanageable is very freeing. Good luck to you.
~Rachel
i am really proud of you.......
everyone is a good candidate for the 12 steps........
there are great steps to live by......it saved my husbands life 16 years ago and
he's still going and living by the steps.
he even applies them to everyday problems......
and the goal is to GET INTO THE SOLUTION.........
AND LOOKS TO ME LIKE YOU ARE DOING A DOG GONE GOOD JOB OF DOING THIS.
so refressing to see that your praying.......
that will help you moe than i can tell you.........
the Lord is wondeful...........and he loves you honey.
God Bless you.
thumper (=*.*=)
everyone is a good candidate for the 12 steps........
there are great steps to live by......it saved my husbands life 16 years ago and
he's still going and living by the steps.
he even applies them to everyday problems......
and the goal is to GET INTO THE SOLUTION.........
AND LOOKS TO ME LIKE YOU ARE DOING A DOG GONE GOOD JOB OF DOING THIS.
so refressing to see that your praying.......
that will help you moe than i can tell you.........
the Lord is wondeful...........and he loves you honey.
God Bless you.
thumper (=*.*=)
WW:
CONGRATULATIONS ON 5 DAYS. That is awesome!
As I do not practice the steps in a meeting environment, I may not be eligible to give advice, but...if you read the steps, then you know they are for everyone.
Detox...ridding your body of the toxins we have put into them is a different state of mind and physical state than what you will experience later on. This is a time of purging and reflection, of feeling the lumps and bumps our hearts and minds have suffered as a result of abuse.
This is not the time, in my opinion, to judge yourself on what you might be able to do in the future...This is a time for living in the moment...one at a time, then on to the next, etc. Detox is not easy...so be gentle with yourself. In time, you are going to feel much differently. Just do this one day at a time, and hour by hour if necessary.
I think you will be an excellent candidate for the 12 steps, we all are...and I think very soon, you will know this even better than anyone else on this forum!
Hang in there...and don't put too much pressure on yourself...just stay clean, and go to meetings and keep posting. Rest, take some hot baths, and be grateful that you are able to willingly stop this madness. Some are not so fortunate: made to detox in hospitals, jails, and then worst of all...not being given the chance at all due to fatal overdose.
There are many blessings in getting clean. You are doing it!!!!!
Hoooray for you Westwind!!!!
Sarah (not feeling clever)
CONGRATULATIONS ON 5 DAYS. That is awesome!
As I do not practice the steps in a meeting environment, I may not be eligible to give advice, but...if you read the steps, then you know they are for everyone.
Detox...ridding your body of the toxins we have put into them is a different state of mind and physical state than what you will experience later on. This is a time of purging and reflection, of feeling the lumps and bumps our hearts and minds have suffered as a result of abuse.
This is not the time, in my opinion, to judge yourself on what you might be able to do in the future...This is a time for living in the moment...one at a time, then on to the next, etc. Detox is not easy...so be gentle with yourself. In time, you are going to feel much differently. Just do this one day at a time, and hour by hour if necessary.
I think you will be an excellent candidate for the 12 steps, we all are...and I think very soon, you will know this even better than anyone else on this forum!
Hang in there...and don't put too much pressure on yourself...just stay clean, and go to meetings and keep posting. Rest, take some hot baths, and be grateful that you are able to willingly stop this madness. Some are not so fortunate: made to detox in hospitals, jails, and then worst of all...not being given the chance at all due to fatal overdose.
There are many blessings in getting clean. You are doing it!!!!!
Hoooray for you Westwind!!!!
Sarah (not feeling clever)
WW-Congratulations.
Don't put the cart before the horse .
Go to the meeting a couple of times,keep an open mind and after about your 2nd or 3rd time try and listen to someone whom you would feel comfortable with being your temporary sponsor.I say temporary in case it's not somebody you feel you can work with,you can ask another.
A sponsor's role is to get you started on the 12 steps.
I did them through a workbook that took about a year for me to complete.It was very detailed and I did a lot of writing.I did it on my PC.After each step,I got with my sponsor and read it.
Talk to family members in AA and ask their opinion too.The 12th steps are the same format for all recovery groups.
IMO...anybody would benefit from them.Don't let fear get in the way.It's natural to be scared.It will catapult your Recovery into a new dimension.It was the one thing I did that I remember removing the obsession of using.
Good Luck.If I can be of help,please ask.
Don't put the cart before the horse .
Go to the meeting a couple of times,keep an open mind and after about your 2nd or 3rd time try and listen to someone whom you would feel comfortable with being your temporary sponsor.I say temporary in case it's not somebody you feel you can work with,you can ask another.
A sponsor's role is to get you started on the 12 steps.
I did them through a workbook that took about a year for me to complete.It was very detailed and I did a lot of writing.I did it on my PC.After each step,I got with my sponsor and read it.
Talk to family members in AA and ask their opinion too.The 12th steps are the same format for all recovery groups.
IMO...anybody would benefit from them.Don't let fear get in the way.It's natural to be scared.It will catapult your Recovery into a new dimension.It was the one thing I did that I remember removing the obsession of using.
Good Luck.If I can be of help,please ask.
You said: I'm impressed with the 12 steps, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to do them without letting everyone down.
There is only one person you need to worry about letting down, and that person is YOU. The steps are self paced and these is no set amount of time to go through them. If you put your heart and soul and desire to be free from pills into the work, nobody is going to be let down. You are not going to be let down.
I don't believe God has forgotten you or that God punishes people for "ignoring" Him. Not my God, he's been there for me even when He was the last thing on my mind. I have faith He is there for you and has been all along. 5 days of no pills is a blessing, and I'm sure He has been with you through this whole ordeal.
There is only one person you need to worry about letting down, and that person is YOU. The steps are self paced and these is no set amount of time to go through them. If you put your heart and soul and desire to be free from pills into the work, nobody is going to be let down. You are not going to be let down.
I don't believe God has forgotten you or that God punishes people for "ignoring" Him. Not my God, he's been there for me even when He was the last thing on my mind. I have faith He is there for you and has been all along. 5 days of no pills is a blessing, and I'm sure He has been with you through this whole ordeal.
WW..don't worry about the steps, don't worry about anything except walking through the door. Relax. What they'll think of you? Is that you are so brave and so willing to do this different. You will be welcomed, I promise. Just have a seat and listen. The question will be asked if there are any new comers. At that point you can choose to raise your hand. Or not. It's up to you.
You're going to be fine. Just focus on walking through the door.
So excited for you...
Cowgirl
You're going to be fine. Just focus on walking through the door.
So excited for you...
Cowgirl
