The title of this post speaks for itself.
Jodi, You are not a loser. With the loss of a very special friend to me today be thankful that you still have your life and you still have a chance to make it right. You gotta keep fighting for you and your children because right now I know of two children who are without a mother . Be thankful Shantel
Jodi, You wouldn't be here if you were. It wouldn't matter enough to even post. You matter, and whatever happened today is almost gone, and tomorrow's another chance to start again.
We only lose when we quit trying, Jodi, and I know you haven't quit.
Jody love,
Honey you know your not a loser...you may feel like one right now, but your not one...Its just your self esteem knocking you down...
The good news about self esteem however is that you can build it back up again....
How do you feel when someone lies to you???
How about if that person lies to you 2 or 3 times???
Now imagine that the same person lies to you HUNDREDS of times, over the years, maybe even a thousand times..????
You wouldnt much believe anything that came out of their mouth now would you??
Of course not..
And thats what has happened to your ego...to your self esteem...to your subconscious even...
EVERYTIME that you have lied to yourself...every single time that you told yourself your going to do something but then dont do it...you feel the same way that another person would feel if they were lied to...
is it any wonder you dont believe yourself anymore..dont trust yourself any more???
BUT..once you start actually DOING what you plan...once you stick to it even once...like you did when you quit drinking and pills for 2 days...your confidence will grow and you WILL start to at least believe in the POSSIBILITY of believing in yourself again....
Keep doing it honey....one hour at a time, one day at a time, and in time you will give yourself back the gift of believing in yourself....
You can do it honey
Love and hugs
Ali
Honey you know your not a loser...you may feel like one right now, but your not one...Its just your self esteem knocking you down...
The good news about self esteem however is that you can build it back up again....
How do you feel when someone lies to you???
How about if that person lies to you 2 or 3 times???
Now imagine that the same person lies to you HUNDREDS of times, over the years, maybe even a thousand times..????
You wouldnt much believe anything that came out of their mouth now would you??
Of course not..
And thats what has happened to your ego...to your self esteem...to your subconscious even...
EVERYTIME that you have lied to yourself...every single time that you told yourself your going to do something but then dont do it...you feel the same way that another person would feel if they were lied to...
is it any wonder you dont believe yourself anymore..dont trust yourself any more???
BUT..once you start actually DOING what you plan...once you stick to it even once...like you did when you quit drinking and pills for 2 days...your confidence will grow and you WILL start to at least believe in the POSSIBILITY of believing in yourself again....
Keep doing it honey....one hour at a time, one day at a time, and in time you will give yourself back the gift of believing in yourself....
You can do it honey
Love and hugs
Ali
I love you Jodi. So many other people here do too.
Talk to us. What happened today?
xx
i love u to and i am happy that your here..............
anything i can do to help u?
hugs**
thumper
anything i can do to help u?
hugs**
thumper
Hey Jodi! The power of our self talk is amazing...try to think more positive things about yourself honey...beating up on you is not doing you any good!
Keep up the fight!
Keep up the fight!
Jodi, i know the feeling, i feel like that alot of the time too, it sucks. im sure everyone feels like that every so often, but that doesnt mean that u are one! chin up!!
Morning Jodi, Today is a new day for you. Thinking of you. Shantel
Jodi-You're not a loser.
You are trapped in a spiral of addiction and have sold yourself on the false ideal that there is no way out.
It is your choice that you are embracing this...........and no one else is to blame.
All I can suggest is you try again.
If you would spend just a modicum of the energy you use to sabatoge yourself into embracing a solution,I have no doubt you would succeed.
I had to get to the place in my life where the pain of using far exceeded the pain of getting clean.
That has not happened for you.You may think it has and ask"How much worse can it get?"
The answer is.........It can get a lot worse.
You're still a high bottom drunk.You have a home,job,car,food,decent looks & probably even drink some decent booze.
You can and will lose all that if you don't change your thinking.
I've never seen so many people try and help one person.It's not because we're bored.It's because we've been there.
Your circumstances may seem unique to you,but they are not.Many have overcome worse.
Brush yourself back off and try again when your ready.
You are trapped in a spiral of addiction and have sold yourself on the false ideal that there is no way out.
It is your choice that you are embracing this...........and no one else is to blame.
All I can suggest is you try again.
If you would spend just a modicum of the energy you use to sabatoge yourself into embracing a solution,I have no doubt you would succeed.
I had to get to the place in my life where the pain of using far exceeded the pain of getting clean.
That has not happened for you.You may think it has and ask"How much worse can it get?"
The answer is.........It can get a lot worse.
You're still a high bottom drunk.You have a home,job,car,food,decent looks & probably even drink some decent booze.
You can and will lose all that if you don't change your thinking.
I've never seen so many people try and help one person.It's not because we're bored.It's because we've been there.
Your circumstances may seem unique to you,but they are not.Many have overcome worse.
Brush yourself back off and try again when your ready.
G.M. Jodi girl,
Today is a new day to start "winning" again...It's all in your hands. Keep reaching out and if possible hit a meeting today. Whatever you do "DON'T QUIT"!!!!!!
You can be whatever you choose to be in this world...choose sober...just for today eh? Whaddya say? Give it another try?
Keep posting,
Jan
Today is a new day to start "winning" again...It's all in your hands. Keep reaching out and if possible hit a meeting today. Whatever you do "DON'T QUIT"!!!!!!
You can be whatever you choose to be in this world...choose sober...just for today eh? Whaddya say? Give it another try?
Keep posting,
Jan
Man cannot remake himself without suffering. For he is both the marble and the sculptor.
--Alexis Carrell
I liked this thought for the day...Put some energy into understanding that you are at a changing point. With change comes unfortable feelings especially if you have been masking those feelings with drugs/alcohol. Start be realizing you are a woman in change.
Thought for the day..
A sculptor begins with an unformed piece of marble. He must be able to envision what he wants to create. Then, armed with tools and courage, he begins to chink away at the marble he does not need. Every day he examines how it looks and what he wants it to become.
Every one of us who is trying to be a better person is like the sculptor. We envision who we want to be and what kind of qualities we believe in. Some of these qualities might be kindness, good self-esteem, the ability to love and feel loved. If we are honest, we must also look with the artist's eye at our faults. We might see some jealousy and resentment, or feelings of superiority. Our faults, human as they are, are like unwanted marble that keeps our most loving selves from taking shape. Carving away at our faults is hard work, and sometimes-even hurts. Yet we do not do this work alone--we can only do it with the help of our God.
My interpretation of this thought in regard to where you are at right now. Your probably taking an inventory on yourself and seeing the things you don't like. You may have made some mistakes but this is the point you start to change. You see what parts you no longer want or need and your getting rid of them. Stay positive we all went through this point in our recovery. It's scarey really seeing yourself but it is also a good motivator to change. Allow yourself to feel this and process it then get it rid of it. Whatever it may be. You can change.
Love,
Jane
--Alexis Carrell
I liked this thought for the day...Put some energy into understanding that you are at a changing point. With change comes unfortable feelings especially if you have been masking those feelings with drugs/alcohol. Start be realizing you are a woman in change.
Thought for the day..
A sculptor begins with an unformed piece of marble. He must be able to envision what he wants to create. Then, armed with tools and courage, he begins to chink away at the marble he does not need. Every day he examines how it looks and what he wants it to become.
Every one of us who is trying to be a better person is like the sculptor. We envision who we want to be and what kind of qualities we believe in. Some of these qualities might be kindness, good self-esteem, the ability to love and feel loved. If we are honest, we must also look with the artist's eye at our faults. We might see some jealousy and resentment, or feelings of superiority. Our faults, human as they are, are like unwanted marble that keeps our most loving selves from taking shape. Carving away at our faults is hard work, and sometimes-even hurts. Yet we do not do this work alone--we can only do it with the help of our God.
My interpretation of this thought in regard to where you are at right now. Your probably taking an inventory on yourself and seeing the things you don't like. You may have made some mistakes but this is the point you start to change. You see what parts you no longer want or need and your getting rid of them. Stay positive we all went through this point in our recovery. It's scarey really seeing yourself but it is also a good motivator to change. Allow yourself to feel this and process it then get it rid of it. Whatever it may be. You can change.
Love,
Jane
Jane...that was an awesome post....Jodi...I have failed at tapering at least 4 times since September.This is my 5th try and so far it is working, Is it easy? No way. But every morning when I get up I feel a sense of hope...I didn't screw up the previous night and my confidence grows. I know you have it in you...yeah...it hurts.No pain, no gain. Honestly, without this board..I don't know if I could do it. Everyone here is a blessing. You can do this...you can do it with me if that helps. I am struggling too.....Much Love, Sharonn
I guess I just feel so out of control, you know? It's sad to me that I don't know how to live my life without getting plastered every single day. If it's not getting jacked up on pills, then it's something else. I always manage to find a way to make myself feel worse, when I'm only trying to feel better. I don't know how to feel good without taking something or drinking something. I know the answer isn't in that bottle. But I still keep looking for it there.
I can't quit just one thing at a time. One thing always, ALWAYS leads back to the other. A concerned friend told me just the other day, that since I quit the pills last week, my drinking has escalated...in a really bad way.
I know how to quit. I just don't know how to live. I don't know how to cope.
I wish sometimes after I post here that I could take it back. I'm not even asking for advice, I guess. I've gotten more advice than I had ever hoped for. It's up to me to follow through.
And I never do.
I guess I am just using this board right now as a way to work through so many feelings that I don't want to face.
And to not feel so alone.
In the meantime, I still feel like a complete failure and loser and f*** up...etc, etc. That's just par for the course though, isn't it?
I can't quit just one thing at a time. One thing always, ALWAYS leads back to the other. A concerned friend told me just the other day, that since I quit the pills last week, my drinking has escalated...in a really bad way.
I know how to quit. I just don't know how to live. I don't know how to cope.
I wish sometimes after I post here that I could take it back. I'm not even asking for advice, I guess. I've gotten more advice than I had ever hoped for. It's up to me to follow through.
And I never do.
I guess I am just using this board right now as a way to work through so many feelings that I don't want to face.
And to not feel so alone.
In the meantime, I still feel like a complete failure and loser and f*** up...etc, etc. That's just par for the course though, isn't it?
Jodi,
"Use away". If writing down your thoughts and feelings here helps you then use us for that reason. Just pray through situations where you are saying you can't cope and think about just doing the next right thing...
Hugs of Support,
Jan
"Use away". If writing down your thoughts and feelings here helps you then use us for that reason. Just pray through situations where you are saying you can't cope and think about just doing the next right thing...
Hugs of Support,
Jan
Jodi, Keep writing out your feeling here. I did yesterday and it helped so much to just be able to let it all out. Shantel
Jodi
You can go to a meeting even if you drink. You will be welcomed. You just can't share. Just go and sit in the back. And listen. One time, that's all. Take the kids if you have to. It's ok. We love kids.
You can go to a meeting even if you drink. You will be welcomed. You just can't share. Just go and sit in the back. And listen. One time, that's all. Take the kids if you have to. It's ok. We love kids.
Jodi
Honey going out right now would do you a world of good, just the physical act of leaving would help...
Did you find out where a local meeting is??
Of course if youve had a lot to drink its best not to load the kids and drive..but if its nearby can you walk there? Just tell him to watch the kids your going out for a nice long walk??
You said before honey that you really liked the meetings...
You need to do things that are good for you...things that you like doing that dont involve hubby or booze or pills...
try to go...
Hugs
Ali
Honey going out right now would do you a world of good, just the physical act of leaving would help...
Did you find out where a local meeting is??
Of course if youve had a lot to drink its best not to load the kids and drive..but if its nearby can you walk there? Just tell him to watch the kids your going out for a nice long walk??
You said before honey that you really liked the meetings...
You need to do things that are good for you...things that you like doing that dont involve hubby or booze or pills...
try to go...
Hugs
Ali
Hey Ali, How are you doing tonight? Jodi, Come back and let us know what is going on with you tonight. We care. You have a heart of gold and are strong. You always try to help other people by your post like you did with me last night let us be here for you. Shantel
hey Shantel
had better days..lol but also worse.
thanks for asking honey..'
ill catch up with you on another thread so that this one stays open for Jody..
once i start telling you, youll never shut me up..lol
Come back Jodi....post and talk to us..
Hugs
Ali
had better days..lol but also worse.
thanks for asking honey..'
ill catch up with you on another thread so that this one stays open for Jody..
once i start telling you, youll never shut me up..lol
Come back Jodi....post and talk to us..
Hugs
Ali
