Hey guys. I am back from NY I started sub. I feel ok i suppose. My leggs do hurt, i did walk a lot today but other than that im ok. Well actually im scaredd out of my mind. He has me on all kind of meds. 16mgs sub to be tapred under his care within 2 weeks. Ativan at night, I wasnt thrilled beleive me, he promised me it wasnt xanex or valium, so i have to trust. I am also taking clonodine at bedtime for blood pressure and resatless legs.
I have been on ambien since the rebakup 3 months ago. 10mgs a night, he says im tissue dependant on that too. Made me soo dam sad, ambien, so well i will battle one thing at a time. I ahve never taken more than 10mgs ambien, its that the norcos were literally killing me, i couldnt eat sleep etc
So i dont know or care if today is day of being clean. All i know i that i havent had any vics since midnight. So thats good
Oh your not gonna bleieve this, i get my Norcos online, he told me i test positive for oxycodone. These people put that in the norocs can u belive it. Ok enough im goig to watch some fotball I need something normal to do.
Please folks support me please
Red
ps- all the pain of my girl leaving me and my grandmothers terminal cancer are all alive right now. Im very sad. I loved my girlfriend soo dam much, and my grandmother more. I am 28 and feel hopeless.
reddog, your doing everything right! your going thru hard times right now but it will get better. Now you can be there for your grandma feeling good and with a clear mind. Proud of you!
Thanks man, i really am doing everything right i guess. Maybe I give myself a little bit of credit. So yes the wds are ok, my left legg does hurt very bad. Concersn me a little bit. Well im going to pray and watch some football
Redog..we are here for you...yes..it's scary..but it's the only way
it is scary and it is the only way. I was thinking that in the office. I had two wait 1.5 hours, i came early. I was thinking if i had not get bub, i didnt even think it would work, well anyways, i was gonna run home and take some. I had no choice from the sick feeling.
I feel better now though
I tortured myself, im cleaing up my room, throwing out pills, bottle etc, I found my old answering machine. I played it. 10 messages from my ex telling my how much she loved me and just little messages. I am still crying. I miss her soo dam much guys. Who cares if i get clean, i will never find a girl who loves me like that again
I feel better now though
I tortured myself, im cleaing up my room, throwing out pills, bottle etc, I found my old answering machine. I played it. 10 messages from my ex telling my how much she loved me and just little messages. I am still crying. I miss her soo dam much guys. Who cares if i get clean, i will never find a girl who loves me like that again
I'm so sorry you are hurting..but doing this will empower you..you will be happier in the long run..Love,Sharonn
Dear Redd,
Get clean and you will find a girl that loves you more!!!!!
Shel
Get clean and you will find a girl that loves you more!!!!!
Shel
I hope so. I really do.
Are you doing 16mg a day or 16mg total for 2 weeks? If you want to be clean bad enough i believe in you and you will be. And believe me, you will find the right person. Just know in your heart there is somebody better than her waiting just for you. Everything happens for a reason and it is going to all work out for the best. Have faith and be strong and dont lose hope. There is another girl out there for you waiting until the time is right. Think of your last girlfriend as a teacher ---- youre going to be fine. You are going to be a stronger person and look back on all this and not even believe it happend!!!
Firesign
Thanks for such positive feedback. I need it. I am taking 16mgs bub tomorrow then a taper,. I should be off it in 2 or 3 weeks. I feel ok right now. My legs hurt, i dont care though, my heart hurts. Ionce I get clean I pray to God I never go back to drugs and that I find a very special woman in my life
Thanks for such positive feedback. I need it. I am taking 16mgs bub tomorrow then a taper,. I should be off it in 2 or 3 weeks. I feel ok right now. My legs hurt, i dont care though, my heart hurts. Ionce I get clean I pray to God I never go back to drugs and that I find a very special woman in my life
Red Dog, you are a very brave man to have made these steps.
While I don't know exactly what you are going through, I have my own struggles and difficulties, like all of us on this board.
Do what your doctor suggests, pray often and be kind to yourself.
You are starting on a big adventure, called sobriety, and like all adventures it is a bit scary.
You just made a big change in your life, and I sincerely wish you the best.
Peace be with you.
While I don't know exactly what you are going through, I have my own struggles and difficulties, like all of us on this board.
Do what your doctor suggests, pray often and be kind to yourself.
You are starting on a big adventure, called sobriety, and like all adventures it is a bit scary.
You just made a big change in your life, and I sincerely wish you the best.
Peace be with you.
Ernie
Very cool man. Thank you for such nice words. Everyone you are all soo dam nice. I did extensive research on sub, when you take away the opiates your brain goesz into withdrawl. I have seen pictures, not he brean but an animated version of what happens when the receports do not hvae opiates on them. Sub fills in the receptos without the high and they are relatively to come off of. The conodine really helped me, i just took my night time does and the resltess legs are much better, the ativan relaxed me. I feel ok. And i deserve to feel good and be a healthy productive adult. I think im going to go on lexapro 10mgs next week, whn the sub goes away i need something t get me over this. So im gonna take it. Its going to be ok
I am going to a counselor and I have learned that pain pills are sooo very very bad to you. They kill. When I quit ealier this year, ct, i didnt knpw any better. I am learing more and more
Im going to bed,. I think i will sleep just fine
Pray
Very cool man. Thank you for such nice words. Everyone you are all soo dam nice. I did extensive research on sub, when you take away the opiates your brain goesz into withdrawl. I have seen pictures, not he brean but an animated version of what happens when the receports do not hvae opiates on them. Sub fills in the receptos without the high and they are relatively to come off of. The conodine really helped me, i just took my night time does and the resltess legs are much better, the ativan relaxed me. I feel ok. And i deserve to feel good and be a healthy productive adult. I think im going to go on lexapro 10mgs next week, whn the sub goes away i need something t get me over this. So im gonna take it. Its going to be ok
I am going to a counselor and I have learned that pain pills are sooo very very bad to you. They kill. When I quit ealier this year, ct, i didnt knpw any better. I am learing more and more
Im going to bed,. I think i will sleep just fine
Pray
Hey Dog...glad you made it. I am sorry you are sad. It is going to take a little while till you feel better emotionally.
I just know that if you stay on norcos, you won't ever get anyone again.
Break ups hurt....and it will take time to heal. But just hang on...this too will pass. Maybe write out a letter, and you don't have to send it. Sometimes just going through the feelings will make them less painful....
You took the right step today....just keep on the right path.
Kerry
I just know that if you stay on norcos, you won't ever get anyone again.
Break ups hurt....and it will take time to heal. But just hang on...this too will pass. Maybe write out a letter, and you don't have to send it. Sometimes just going through the feelings will make them less painful....
You took the right step today....just keep on the right path.
Kerry
Thank you little beach. Yes I know if i stayed on noroc i would die in a couple of years and even if i didnt the quality of life would be aweful and I would never meet a girl. No more sneaking pills, bringing them out when i go out, counting, buying ahhh its too much. I have a long way to go but this sub is really helping me
Pray
Pray
Red-Congratulations.It sounds like you are taking some real positive steps.You are a young man and have a whole life ahead of you.Remember, things are real intensified right now.Especially feelings.You can deal with all that stuff in due time.The only thing I would be focused on is getting clean and starting a relationship with yourself.Love has a way of integrating in your life when you least expect it.It will be better than you ever imagined when you have a healthy mind.
Good Luck my friend.
Good Luck my friend.
Bless you all.
Dear Redog
My heart truely goes out to you in on so many levels, I Read the pain, & I wish I COULD JUST GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST HUG!!
28.....So much to live for, & so many reasons to get off these drugs. 1st your young, your heart will mend, but 1st your body must mend, when the mind is clear again, it knows the right direction to take, and it will, have faith please!!
Your Grandma seems to mean an awful lot to you, I Would never try to minimize the pain you are feeling right now.
I Lost my best friend 10/12/05 2 weeks ago, from cancer, we were friends for 45 years, her sister, who is also dying of stage 4 lung cancer will not be with us for much longer either, also my best friend for 45 yrs.......There is no way to describe the grief & pain i am suffering.........But redog, for years I Have been scaring them with my drug abuse, When I quit, & they found out, I'llnever be able to tell you how happy they were, So that was final gift to my friend who has passed & it will be the final gift I give my friend who is going to pass, They love me as much as I love them.........what better gift could I Give to people who we love & they love us back..............Your Grandma will be so at peace with what you are doing in your young life, Your a Miracle, Don't you ever forget that..........and niether will we!!!! God Bless & make you well!!
Love Dottie
My heart truely goes out to you in on so many levels, I Read the pain, & I wish I COULD JUST GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST HUG!!
28.....So much to live for, & so many reasons to get off these drugs. 1st your young, your heart will mend, but 1st your body must mend, when the mind is clear again, it knows the right direction to take, and it will, have faith please!!
Your Grandma seems to mean an awful lot to you, I Would never try to minimize the pain you are feeling right now.
I Lost my best friend 10/12/05 2 weeks ago, from cancer, we were friends for 45 years, her sister, who is also dying of stage 4 lung cancer will not be with us for much longer either, also my best friend for 45 yrs.......There is no way to describe the grief & pain i am suffering.........But redog, for years I Have been scaring them with my drug abuse, When I quit, & they found out, I'llnever be able to tell you how happy they were, So that was final gift to my friend who has passed & it will be the final gift I give my friend who is going to pass, They love me as much as I love them.........what better gift could I Give to people who we love & they love us back..............Your Grandma will be so at peace with what you are doing in your young life, Your a Miracle, Don't you ever forget that..........and niether will we!!!! God Bless & make you well!!
Love Dottie
Red....proud of you buddy. You did good.
Trust in your dr and in yourself. Let yourself grieve. Losing a relationship can feel like a death but at some point you have to move on. You'll know when the time is right.
Did your dr talk to you about NA or AA? Does he have a treatment program in mind for you once you're off the sub?
You've got a lot of meds on board right now, so be careful..Listen to your body. If you feel out of whack, let someone know.
You're always welcome to email me again.
Take care
Cowgirl
Trust in your dr and in yourself. Let yourself grieve. Losing a relationship can feel like a death but at some point you have to move on. You'll know when the time is right.
Did your dr talk to you about NA or AA? Does he have a treatment program in mind for you once you're off the sub?
You've got a lot of meds on board right now, so be careful..Listen to your body. If you feel out of whack, let someone know.
You're always welcome to email me again.
Take care
Cowgirl
