Gidday Izzy
I am sitting here thinking of you and sending you energy, i have read your posts and gone back and read some of your first posts as well and i keep sensing the addict is supplying the words of despair BUT the person is typing them and i can feel the hope in each word typed even if at times they talk of no hope.
Please keep posting your experience strength and hope because it is reality and alive and while there is hope there is life.
All this is probably pissin you off at the moment and yes i am a male and when i drink i am only out for myself(addiction) and i wouldnt give a F about you or anyone, i just wanted to go into blackout and die because i was in a position where the addict wanted to die and the person didnt so the addict needed to shut the person down and by isolating myself via more drinking it nearly suceeded.
I will never know your life my eyes are not yours and my insanity is not yours but i can relate to being abused, physically, mentally, sexually and spiritually.
My rock bottom is my rock bottom and yours is yours but your hope is my hope because without hope addiction is the winner and the hate that the F##KA had for me i have turned back on it, one day at a time.
Izzy even if you dont think you are worth it, I do.
Light and love Zac
Izzy,
Zac described the "insanity", I too, lived in while drinking and drugging, and I can identify with your pain like I posted in another thread. Can you call the local AA hotline? Sometimes just talking to another alcoholic at the other end of the phone line helps so much...and you can remain totally anonymous...I've called my local AA Central office and was talked down; one alcoholic talking to another, that's how the whole the AA program began (Bill W & Dr Bob hooking up over seventy years ago) and no one can understand anyone better, I believe, than another alcoholic/addict who's been there. Whomever would answer the phone would ask nothing of you...in fact, they would be grateful for the call because you'd be helping to keep that person sober too! Check in and let us know how you are doing.
Zac described the "insanity", I too, lived in while drinking and drugging, and I can identify with your pain like I posted in another thread. Can you call the local AA hotline? Sometimes just talking to another alcoholic at the other end of the phone line helps so much...and you can remain totally anonymous...I've called my local AA Central office and was talked down; one alcoholic talking to another, that's how the whole the AA program began (Bill W & Dr Bob hooking up over seventy years ago) and no one can understand anyone better, I believe, than another alcoholic/addict who's been there. Whomever would answer the phone would ask nothing of you...in fact, they would be grateful for the call because you'd be helping to keep that person sober too! Check in and let us know how you are doing.
You ever touched the blarney stone Zac? you have the gift of words my friend.
Izzy - check in and let us know if you're OK - or even if you're not OK.
Lots of folks here wanting only the best for you.
Idg.
Izzy - check in and let us know if you're OK - or even if you're not OK.
Lots of folks here wanting only the best for you.
Idg.
If you're going to let go and let God, you gotta quit taking it back, too. I was notorious for knowing what was best for me. It wasn't until I was physically so sick and mentally so distraught that I finally said, "I can't do this anymore!" It's been simple, cheap, and incredibly enlightening--and certainly nearly shrink-free. I'm easing off the chems--no Campral in nearly 6 months, no Disulfiram (Antabuse) in over 3 months, no alcohol in months (but I've only been going to AA for a little over 37 days) and I feel reborn.
Izzy, you gotta stop snitching it back. I've met some of the most incredble people at these meetings and I find myself imagining what you folks would be like in F2F meetings--the fascination and disbelief at what we've done with our lives and how incredibly turned-around they've become. All because we allow complete strangers to come into our lives and help us. Phenomenal. Truly. It's the way MY Higher Power always told me it was supposed to be, anyway. Well, except for the whole Leprosy thing....
That STILL creeps me out...
Izzy, you gotta stop snitching it back. I've met some of the most incredble people at these meetings and I find myself imagining what you folks would be like in F2F meetings--the fascination and disbelief at what we've done with our lives and how incredibly turned-around they've become. All because we allow complete strangers to come into our lives and help us. Phenomenal. Truly. It's the way MY Higher Power always told me it was supposed to be, anyway. Well, except for the whole Leprosy thing....
That STILL creeps me out...
Hi all... thought I'd drop a line...
I'm still drinking but not to excess... I'm feeling a little better... but have written to my Psychiatrist telling her I'm not going back to the Psychologist.
Thanks for all the kind responses... I appreciate it...
I'm not feeling like talking much... but I'm ok.
I'll write again soon.
Izzy X
I'm still drinking but not to excess... I'm feeling a little better... but have written to my Psychiatrist telling her I'm not going back to the Psychologist.
Thanks for all the kind responses... I appreciate it...
I'm not feeling like talking much... but I'm ok.
I'll write again soon.
Izzy X
Izzy,
Great to see your post. It has been suggested to me to think the drink all the way through....for me managing and controlling my drinking was so hard....it took so much energy....I hope to see another post from you.
Great to see your post. It has been suggested to me to think the drink all the way through....for me managing and controlling my drinking was so hard....it took so much energy....I hope to see another post from you.
Gidday Izzy
Thankyou for posting and i see from your post that you are doing a lot of thinking about all that is going on, small steps Izzy and deal with one thing at a time. It made my day to see your post thanks Izzy.
Light and love Zac
Thankyou for posting and i see from your post that you are doing a lot of thinking about all that is going on, small steps Izzy and deal with one thing at a time. It made my day to see your post thanks Izzy.
Light and love Zac
