Living A Life With An Addict

Hi I have been with my boyfriend for almost 20 years not all have been bad but the last five years have been. I wasn't aware of how bad his addiction was to methamphetamines. I have almost lost everything myself in regards to self respect. I do have the love of my family and friends but I wish they could understand my love for him. I have no come to the conclusion that I have to let go in order for him to overcome his addiction. I have listened to his excuses time and time again and I believe with all my heart he needs help. He actually for the first time wrote and gave a letter myself the therapist and probation officers stating that he wants help. I don't know is there is anything that can help him now. He has used for the last five years and probably every day for the last year-and-a-half. Is in drug court now was on probation for the last 2 years and now was on probation again with drug court he has had two or more violations approbation or use I truly believe his only help is with inpatient treatment I'm possibly medication can anybody speak about this?

Who has gotten to the point where he was literally shaking because the frayed of being alone. I guess I know if he can't do this by himself because he has lived in the same city 45 years. He knows too many people and too many places to get the drugs. I pray that he finds his way back to a sober and healthy life. I wish I could have been the strength and person to walk by his side I just don't know if I have it in me anymore. I see the pain in his eyes when he's trying to be sober and the devil and darkness when he's high.
Hi Scottysotherhalf, I just read your post and it's so sad I wish I could help you. I don't know much about Meth. I'm sure you've had a very hard time putting up with your partner during the drug times. Do you know much about the Meth? Have you ever read up on it to see what he's up against? That's what I would do and try to learn as much as you can about it. What damage it does etc? He may have lived in his town for all those years but if he wants a fresh start at life again he would be better moving away from the temptation because that's always going to be there and they'll set off triggers for him to start again. Good things happen all the time with these drug courts. I hope he manages to get sober and stay sober. Meanwhile don't be too down on yourself. You've gave this relationship more than most would have so your not a quitter that's for sure! Just play it as it goes along and see what happens next. If you decide to leave so be it! You've certainly paid your dues to and you have no need to feel guilty. Good luck whatever you decide to do. Take care. Mary.