I'm mad at myself for getting high again, so therefore I complain to my husband and whine about how there's not enough fairness going on in this house and get all assertive and tell him I need him to listen to me, active listening....the kind where I can have intimacy about what I'm going thru.
he is so far gone down the rabbit hole and I'm not going down there with him.
God I can hardly wait until Mondays' ladies group.
I tried talking to myself to wrap my head around what is happening for me living in this looney bin.
So I guess I'm trying to express myself appropriately here.
Underneath the anger is the disappointment in myself.
Speaking of ants, they've invaded my backyard this summer and no rubber tree plant available. :-(
Ants and Birds! Birds eat ants don't they? Not a good pairing I'm thinking LOL!
Stop beating yourself up, stop beating your husband up, and let go of the fairness thing, ain't gonna happen. Resentment is toxic. Tomorrow (or today depending on your time zone) is another day.
Love ya anyway! What do you need? Think about it...
Kerry
Stop beating yourself up, stop beating your husband up, and let go of the fairness thing, ain't gonna happen. Resentment is toxic. Tomorrow (or today depending on your time zone) is another day.
Love ya anyway! What do you need? Think about it...
Kerry
you haven't slipped back into old habits tho have you? a slip is a slip and if you can catch it good on you.. seriously most slips lead right back into daily use. You are a strong woman and you give inspiration to me and im sure to many other people on these boards. Every time you slip you can see it as just that; a slip and not a gateway back into the normal. I'm so glad you're still here and posting. Whatever happens you have and will always be seen as the main contributor to the pot forums.. at least in my mind. You rock wonderwoman :)
ww
i wish there was some magical thing i could say to you to make you feel better. but it just isnt that easy. just know we respect and value you as a member here. the board just wouldnt be the same without you. just hang in there and dont give up. even though you slipped up, you still inspire me. i read how you feel after the slide and i know i just dont want to go through that. keep on keepin on.
i wish there was some magical thing i could say to you to make you feel better. but it just isnt that easy. just know we respect and value you as a member here. the board just wouldnt be the same without you. just hang in there and dont give up. even though you slipped up, you still inspire me. i read how you feel after the slide and i know i just dont want to go through that. keep on keepin on.
I bet and know you say better things to me or anyone else on here if/when and after a slip.
So be as nice to yourself as you are everyone else.
So be as nice to yourself as you are everyone else.
ditto what jamv said:) jojo
amazing your strength to get that thread locked too - those codie rings work huh?!:)
amazing your strength to get that thread locked too - those codie rings work huh?!:)
Hi Wonderwoman,
I have only recently joined the board and have been observing your posts for a bit.
Don't be down on yourself, to be living in an environment where the smoke is always available would be such a constant temptation, it just shows how strong a character you must be to be able to have stopped smoking in the first place....I know that if I was in the same situation I wouldn't be strong enough to resist.
sed.
I have only recently joined the board and have been observing your posts for a bit.
Don't be down on yourself, to be living in an environment where the smoke is always available would be such a constant temptation, it just shows how strong a character you must be to be able to have stopped smoking in the first place....I know that if I was in the same situation I wouldn't be strong enough to resist.
sed.
You guys are the best. I appreciate you so much. You say such kind things and I hope you know and understand the power of your words. <smile>
Well, it's a brand new day, step one, eat a healthy breakfast, step two, get some sunshine, step three watch the parade with my son. baby steps...so far so good.....I am not doing a wake and bake....I'm not even close to wanting to.
I feel guilt about my son. My oldest, he says he is having a hard time being in anyones vehicle....I think I gave him post traumatic stress disorder when I had the accident with the truck. He has become a nervous wreck of a passenger with his friends. I told him I was sorry and I'll help him to get over the scary incident. The only thing I can think of is to put him behind the wheel, take this opportunity to teach him to drive, maybe he'd feel better if he was in control. I don't know....actually, now that I think about it, perhaps I'm not the right person to teach him to drive...LMAO.
Regarding the fairness...my husband told me to go back to sleep this morning and he drove our daughter to summer school for a change. :-)
Today I closed my eyes and asked my spirit guides to take away all my resentments, guilt and shame. Just for today.
love and light,
Diana
Well, it's a brand new day, step one, eat a healthy breakfast, step two, get some sunshine, step three watch the parade with my son. baby steps...so far so good.....I am not doing a wake and bake....I'm not even close to wanting to.
I feel guilt about my son. My oldest, he says he is having a hard time being in anyones vehicle....I think I gave him post traumatic stress disorder when I had the accident with the truck. He has become a nervous wreck of a passenger with his friends. I told him I was sorry and I'll help him to get over the scary incident. The only thing I can think of is to put him behind the wheel, take this opportunity to teach him to drive, maybe he'd feel better if he was in control. I don't know....actually, now that I think about it, perhaps I'm not the right person to teach him to drive...LMAO.
Regarding the fairness...my husband told me to go back to sleep this morning and he drove our daughter to summer school for a change. :-)
Today I closed my eyes and asked my spirit guides to take away all my resentments, guilt and shame. Just for today.
love and light,
Diana
WW~ Many hugs to you Girl! Just know that anytime you slip we are here to help you up again. You know the drill, DON'T EVER GIVE UP!! & DON'T swim off into the deep end. I know even if you are slipping occasionally your body is benefitting greatly from all the clean time in between. See you even inspired a new poster so GOOD FOR YOU!! I have appreciated all your contributions along the way & there have been many days that I felt too guilty to post but came here to read your words of enlightenment. I know you can do it if you just stick to it! As for your son, thats only natural & maybe it will make him a more cautious driver. You might have just saved his life! I doubt he will be recklessly speeding around like teenagers are known for doing. Think about it, everything happens for a reason. Hope you enjoy your weekend!
aea
aea
<post removed>
girls- let's get out those codie rings again:) jo
<post removed>
YEA! Today is a better day, and good for hubby!! He gets some points for that, hah!
LMAO, yeah maybe you shouldn't be the one to teach him...
Just a suggestion, but you all might think about the no guest posts option they have on the Pill board and Loved ones board. Helps keep some of the riff raff out i.e <post removed>
Hang in there my friend, progress not perfection.
Kerry
LMAO, yeah maybe you shouldn't be the one to teach him...
Just a suggestion, but you all might think about the no guest posts option they have on the Pill board and Loved ones board. Helps keep some of the riff raff out i.e <post removed>
Hang in there my friend, progress not perfection.
Kerry
I read what Anna wrote here and then shared with my husband. He said, "Sounds like a case of "pot envy."
LMAO
It occurred to me that maybe that's what I have as well.
In other news, there is this wonderful woman named Anna that my daughter works for.....my daughter has been so down on herself lately......she is taking a difficult math class (pure 10) over the month of July and Anna has taken it upon herself to help my daughter with it. I shared with my daughter that I am proud of her for asking people in her life for help and not wallowing in shame. Polynomials cause headaches.
Sometimes my life lessons run parallel with my daughters'.....I only seem to notice this stuff when I'm working recovery.
Yes I slipped at 6 months and then again at four months. No I'm not in a full blown relapse and I have goals in place to help me in the upcoming week, along with this board.
God bless kind people everywhere with a sense of humour.
LMAO
It occurred to me that maybe that's what I have as well.
In other news, there is this wonderful woman named Anna that my daughter works for.....my daughter has been so down on herself lately......she is taking a difficult math class (pure 10) over the month of July and Anna has taken it upon herself to help my daughter with it. I shared with my daughter that I am proud of her for asking people in her life for help and not wallowing in shame. Polynomials cause headaches.
Sometimes my life lessons run parallel with my daughters'.....I only seem to notice this stuff when I'm working recovery.
Yes I slipped at 6 months and then again at four months. No I'm not in a full blown relapse and I have goals in place to help me in the upcoming week, along with this board.
God bless kind people everywhere with a sense of humour.
