Gidday Everyone
When i first of all got sober my mind questioned the reason behind everything i did and it usually put a spin on things that was of a negative nature to the point that i went along with some of these thought processes as at the time they appealed to my addictive thoughts, as i have progressed in recovery i have done the people pleasing, the thousand sentence explanation why i dont drink, the trust till you get hurt ( didnt listen fully to my developing intuition and also my addictive mind was still strong) and my spirituality was still gaining a foothold in the mountain of addiction which occupied the rooms of my mind.
Now down the track a bit my spirituality is developing fine and i have a strong sense of where i want to be in life, and yet i still allow that part of my head that puts a question mark in front of all my actions and thoughts to operate in my mind although the rooms it occupies are getting less and less as the light and love of sobriety and freedom fuelled by gratitude and faith get stronger.
I am good at seeing things that are happening for others and helping but i still do not listen to my own words because they are not only for others but me as well.....thankyou God for the wisdom to know the difference and now i pray for the action to live the difference and be rid of the ghosts of the past that haunt my mind and feed the addictive part of it that is always looking for an angle.
Whenever i have self doubt and times when i do think addictively or negative and like what im thinking that is when i ask my higher power to encircle me and now i have to start doing the ground work that allows that encircling protection to take any negative energy and turn it to the light.
Why am i rambling.... because i need to and as long as i understand what i need to do then half the battle is won and also a very important thing i learnt early on is the world that exists in the fear of my mind and reality are F...ing poles apart
light and love Zac
Thanks for sharing that. I needed it.
Zak, thanks again for this post, it was what I needed today...
I think I am still learning this.... oh well
one day at a time... Cookster
| QUOTE |
| also a very important thing i learnt early on is the world that exists in the fear of my mind and reality are F...ing poles apart |
I think I am still learning this.... oh well
one day at a time... Cookster
Gidday Cookster
Try writing what is annoying you down and then once it is on paper it wont seem as bad, itemise out what is real and what is mind scenarios fed by fear.
Work out a plan that is workable and it could be as simple as praying about it every night for 2 weeks.
Sometimes the stress I was feeling was real and sometimes I put stress on myself via an over active mind thinking about a million things at once and complicating the sh#t out of it usually to do with trying to please everyone and solve every problem
Stress and Christmas go hand in hand as the silly season approaches everyone wants everthing done yesterday.
Kick back and relax Cookster as you are doing really well, so just take time to pause when agitated and the solutions will come one solution at a time.
light and love Zac
Try writing what is annoying you down and then once it is on paper it wont seem as bad, itemise out what is real and what is mind scenarios fed by fear.
Work out a plan that is workable and it could be as simple as praying about it every night for 2 weeks.
Sometimes the stress I was feeling was real and sometimes I put stress on myself via an over active mind thinking about a million things at once and complicating the sh#t out of it usually to do with trying to please everyone and solve every problem
Stress and Christmas go hand in hand as the silly season approaches everyone wants everthing done yesterday.
Kick back and relax Cookster as you are doing really well, so just take time to pause when agitated and the solutions will come one solution at a time.
light and love Zac
