Hello all. I'm new here, and a friend had pointed out these boards to me, so I'm posting in the hope that maybe my experiences might be able to help someone struggling or who doesn't know what else to do.
My name is Robin, I live in Victoria, and I am a recovering drug addict. I was born and raised Mormon in a single parent home. My mother was, herself, raised in an alcoholic home. My parents got divorced when I was five, but my dad actually left when I was 15 months old. My mom did nothing else but feel sorry for herself while I grew up.
When I was about 15, I picked up my first joint and loved it. It made me feel good, and most of all, I actually started to have friends. So in continuted to smoke it. I went through the obsessions and didn't realize that it wasn't normal for someone to think the way that I thought. I eventually became a chronic user.
It soon became a lifestyle for me, as it tends to become. All of my friends were potheads, and if you didn't smoke it, you weren't my friend. It slowly got to the point where I would put my stuff in the pawn shop so that I might have some more money to get my pot. When that ran out, I was out breaking into cars and houses to get more money. Whatever it took to get more, I was willing to do.
It finally came to the point where I checked myself into the psych ward. I had tried quitting before that point, but had come to the realization that I could not do it on my own. It never lasted long.
It was at this point that I was threatened with the existence of life on the street as I had no where else to go, and they were shutting down a part of the psych ward that I was in for renovations, and they were only keeping the sickest patients there. So I ended moving into a recovery home. I learned that it is the disease of addiction, not my substance use that was the problem. I learned, too, that I am powerless over my addiction, and that my life had becoe unmanagable.
I think this is a hard thing for anyone to accept, especially for us pot smokers, but the evidence clearly stared me in the face. I had also learned that because it's my disease from which I'm trying to recover, that my problem cannot be treated any differently than any other drug addict. Again, I emphasize, that it is the disease of addiction, and not the drug of choice that is the problem. Don't be fooled for one moment that just because you smoke pot that it means you don't have a problem.
I have since gotten 2 1/2 years clean and am quite active in my recovery. I am now a board member of the recovery home in which I used to live. I am an active member in my church again, and I am finally getting my high school and maintain a 90%+ grade average.
I enjoy life like I never have before, and I look forward to each new day. Each day clean is a gift and a blessing. I got clean and stayed clean by following certain suggestions. I attended my twelve step meeting at least once a day for the first ninety day, I got a home group, I got a sponsor, and I got involved in service work.
This disease kills. It really does. Why just the other day, my sponsor and I went to the home of another sponsee's of his house, and we discovered his dead body. It had been sitting there for about 4-5 days. Please, none of us has to end up like this.
I know that there is a certain stigma attached to Marijuana users, in that the drug itself does not kill. It will never take any of us to the bottom that other drugs can. And it is almost as socially accepted as alcohol. All these aside, if you think you have a problem, and cannot quit on your own, please seek help.
No one need ever live in the hell that drug abuse can bring. We need not become the animals to which drug addiction can turn us. There is more ot life than just finding ways and means to get more. If anyone has any questions or just needs someone with which to speak, I'm available. If you think you have a problem with Marijuana, and are unsure of where to turn, please let me know and I'm sure I can help. I have experienced the addiction to Marijuana, and it wasn't pretty.
It is not any different that any other drug addiction. At least it cannot be treated that way.
God Bless.
Robin P
Robin, I just wanted to thank you for taking the time to offer your story on this board. I hope you will check in with us regularly and let us know how you are doing. There is no shortage of people who are trying to get clean but for many, it is difficult to accept the fact that addiction is the issue here.
This is a great place for service work, though many are just like I was: I was willing to do just about anything to get sober short of what actually wound up working for me. I wasted years trying to do it my way.
I think that when we simply own our Truth and allow others to bear witness to it, we do them a service.
Again, welcome!
August
This is a great place for service work, though many are just like I was: I was willing to do just about anything to get sober short of what actually wound up working for me. I wasted years trying to do it my way.
I think that when we simply own our Truth and allow others to bear witness to it, we do them a service.
Again, welcome!
August
Yes Robin, Thank you so much for sharing! I long for the day when I am so clean that I can post my name. WoW wouldn't that be kool! It helped alot reading your post and I hope you will keep sharing.
Me
Me
robin, you may want to post on the new board. recovery stories are being collected there and your story is a help.
