Hi everyone
I Just have a few things to say about my past behavior with certain people and CERTAIN TOPICS
As most of you know I Have just lost my best friend of 45 years, And her sister also my best friend, won't be with us much longer, she is in stage 4 lung cancer and the Chemo has stopped because it was making it spread even faster............This has been a very hard time for me, but you all have written words of compassion, You are all responsable for helping me through this terrible time.
But I have done a great deal of thinking about the fact that we all only dance on this earth for a short time, and we better do it right.
My whole point to saying all this, Is, How insane things can get on the board sometimes, and I'm sure I was way too judgemental & kept wanting people to see things my way LOL
How stupid that all seems to me now.........Life's too short to be bickering all the time, I am glad we are all getting along again, For those people who I may have offended........I pray I will never act that way again,
The bad blood with anyone on this board, is over as far as i'm concerned, I Am happy that Pam & I are doing good, & that's the way I want to keep it.
I Want it to be that way with e'one
You all mean the world to me & I Never could have made it without you ALL
Iv'e never known such compassion as I have these last 2 weeks,
What I Do know is your a great bunch of people, and the next time I Get my panties in a bunch with anyone,.........I Always want to remember how special you all are........& that includes e'one
I Don't ever want to forget what everyone of you has meant to me & how you saw me through a real bad time & I Love you all for being you!!
Much Love
Dottie
Dottie..do you know what this is? It's called growth.
You are my hero.
Love
Cowgirl
You are my hero.
Love
Cowgirl
Thanks Lisa,
It does feel like growth, & I Hope I Continue to grow!!
Love Dottie
It does feel like growth, & I Hope I Continue to grow!!
Love Dottie
That was really beautiful although I have fortunately not had any confrontations I personally see that you are always trying to help the addict still suffering evn though you are having a rough time right now I am just glad that you are finding some peace in all this turmoil in your life and you obviously have gained a brand new ANGEL to watch over you to guide you to find this deserved peace.That is a wonderful blessing .
Hey Dear Twin:
So brave of you to come on the board and bring this out. So, I will also plead guilty. I have started a big blow-up if anyone did.
I so apologize to anyone that I have in the past and may still make little remarks, too that may not help them at all.
Had you not posted this thread, it would not having got me thinking about my own faults.
Love you even more.
I know a lot of people will see this and see themselves.
You have still always been a doll in my eyes.
Love again,
Your Twin
So brave of you to come on the board and bring this out. So, I will also plead guilty. I have started a big blow-up if anyone did.
I so apologize to anyone that I have in the past and may still make little remarks, too that may not help them at all.
Had you not posted this thread, it would not having got me thinking about my own faults.
Love you even more.
I know a lot of people will see this and see themselves.
You have still always been a doll in my eyes.
Love again,
Your Twin
Dottie
Did you go back to meetings yet? They can help sort out the way you're feeling, ya know.
Did you go back to meetings yet? They can help sort out the way you're feeling, ya know.
Dottie
We havent spoke directly,yet I feel close to you ,as you have been speaking of cancer , chemo, & friends. There was no-one in this world I was closer to than my Dad when cancer took him 4 years ago.
I guess I was very lucky that it took him quickly and the suffering didnt go on & on. He was only 66.
But this post is about the strength you have- to get on each day with sick friends on your mind,while having problems of your own. Very selfless!
Your strength is encouraging,inspirational and motivational.
Thanks -
lots of respect & love
jack
We havent spoke directly,yet I feel close to you ,as you have been speaking of cancer , chemo, & friends. There was no-one in this world I was closer to than my Dad when cancer took him 4 years ago.
I guess I was very lucky that it took him quickly and the suffering didnt go on & on. He was only 66.
But this post is about the strength you have- to get on each day with sick friends on your mind,while having problems of your own. Very selfless!
Your strength is encouraging,inspirational and motivational.
Thanks -
lots of respect & love
jack
All I can say is WOW .. Hero,, you bet,, respect..you have mine, man it took a lot to type that..took a lot to admit it to yourself, just like I had to shove a foot in my mouth with Rae last night, but we both resolved it quickly as I was at fault.. it was like I was the star of the movie The Exorcist,, I was Regan for a split second.
Been there will all the deaths of my loved ones, and man does it hurt, the book that was referred to me Dottie was Elisabeth Kbler-Ross ON DEATH AND DYING . I don't know where I would have been without it. That and the Bible. It helped me tremendously, she has a ton of books out, you may want to try, but the one I read was on Death and Dying.
http://www.elisabethkublerross.com/
Take Care.
Brook
Been there will all the deaths of my loved ones, and man does it hurt, the book that was referred to me Dottie was Elisabeth Kbler-Ross ON DEATH AND DYING . I don't know where I would have been without it. That and the Bible. It helped me tremendously, she has a ton of books out, you may want to try, but the one I read was on Death and Dying.
http://www.elisabethkublerross.com/
Take Care.
Brook
Dottie, your thread is the first one that I saw and read this morning. Girl, you certainly have my respect. You are one strong lady and I admire you for all that you do for everyone. And Hey, I was just as guilty, if not more so than you with all of that other mess. We love you and we are so proud of you. Growth looks beautiful on you. Take Care Honey................
if you want to find richer meaning and purpose in your life, just keep loving.
my heart thanks you for loving me dottie.
namaste -
sammy
my heart thanks you for loving me dottie.
namaste -
sammy
Dottie,
I'm sure your friend is smiling right now, what a beautiful friendship you had with her. The loss of someone close is so heavy on the heart, and I know your heart hurts right now, but taking something from her death says a lot about you....and her.
So now, each time you let things slide or try to see the good in someone else, her spirit lives on in you. What a beautiful gift to and from your friend.
xx
Redd
Hi there, I hope you are alright, you sound so straight headed and know your good and bad. Been there and done it and the amazing thing on this board is the support help and forgiveness. It's brilliant and so are you. Take carexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Dottie, we all have been in a bad spot at times....how wonderful that you can come out and make an amend to those that you may have upset at one time or another...like Cowgirl said, this is growth, at it's finest, and it looks great on you!
You have been through the emotional wringer lately and I empathize with where you are right not...you are so right....life is too short!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
You have been through the emotional wringer lately and I empathize with where you are right not...you are so right....life is too short!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Dear Jack
66 is so young & I'm so terrible sorry, It sounds like you have a lot of fond memories of your Dad, and that is wonderful.
Like you, I am grateful that Carol did not suffer a very long time.........It took only 4 months from her diagnosis, She was only in hospice 2 days but her son tells me the Hospice nurses were wonderful, & so I Believe she went peacefully because of those nurses, & with dignity........She was married to a man who never showed her an ounce of respect.........But she got it at Hospice,and for that I'm grateful........some things I'm just finding out, For one thing her husband doesn't believe in God, which I Knew.......But Carol did though she never spoke about it.............But when she was in Hospice, She would talk to the nurses about God and told the nurses she was ready to go.
That has given me a great deal of peace, I Was so happy to hear that she was happy to be going home to God,........Her words, not mine!!
I Will always miss her terribly, but knowing the things she said befor she died give me a good deal of peace now, and I Feel connected again, God Bless her wondeful Son for letting me know everything.
Thank You for your kind words as well, It means a lot to me!!
Love Dottie
66 is so young & I'm so terrible sorry, It sounds like you have a lot of fond memories of your Dad, and that is wonderful.
Like you, I am grateful that Carol did not suffer a very long time.........It took only 4 months from her diagnosis, She was only in hospice 2 days but her son tells me the Hospice nurses were wonderful, & so I Believe she went peacefully because of those nurses, & with dignity........She was married to a man who never showed her an ounce of respect.........But she got it at Hospice,and for that I'm grateful........some things I'm just finding out, For one thing her husband doesn't believe in God, which I Knew.......But Carol did though she never spoke about it.............But when she was in Hospice, She would talk to the nurses about God and told the nurses she was ready to go.
That has given me a great deal of peace, I Was so happy to hear that she was happy to be going home to God,........Her words, not mine!!
I Will always miss her terribly, but knowing the things she said befor she died give me a good deal of peace now, and I Feel connected again, God Bless her wondeful Son for letting me know everything.
Thank You for your kind words as well, It means a lot to me!!
Love Dottie
To all who replied
Thank you so much, Redd what you said was beautiful, I suddenly felt some peace that Carol was guiding me & in some way letting me know she is OK,and she wants me to be OK.
she was usually a very peaceful soul, But......LMFAO........Carol, Maryellen, and I are all Irish.........so you can imagine us with a few beers in us in the old days, Holy Sh*t........we were hell on wheels, I Call Maryellen every day, & we tell each other funny storie's........sometimes I Laugh so hard I Cry.
We could fill a book of both funny & sad stories, But the good always outweighed the bad.
As soon as this is over, because I Still have to deal with Maryellen, I Want to start a journal for all of our combined children & grandchildren.
7 Kids & as of now 10 Grandchildren and date it back to 1960 when we met
I Want them to know who their Moms were from childhood to motherhood & beyond, I want them to know the funnier sides of us, not just the booze & in my case pills.........Carol & Mel NEVER DID DRUGS, Thank God, but they both quit drinking way before Carol died.
I Hope I Find the strengh I Need to do this, But once more Thanks for being with me through this.........I'll be OK
Much Love & Respect
Dottie
Thank you so much, Redd what you said was beautiful, I suddenly felt some peace that Carol was guiding me & in some way letting me know she is OK,and she wants me to be OK.
she was usually a very peaceful soul, But......LMFAO........Carol, Maryellen, and I are all Irish.........so you can imagine us with a few beers in us in the old days, Holy Sh*t........we were hell on wheels, I Call Maryellen every day, & we tell each other funny storie's........sometimes I Laugh so hard I Cry.
We could fill a book of both funny & sad stories, But the good always outweighed the bad.
As soon as this is over, because I Still have to deal with Maryellen, I Want to start a journal for all of our combined children & grandchildren.
7 Kids & as of now 10 Grandchildren and date it back to 1960 when we met
I Want them to know who their Moms were from childhood to motherhood & beyond, I want them to know the funnier sides of us, not just the booze & in my case pills.........Carol & Mel NEVER DID DRUGS, Thank God, but they both quit drinking way before Carol died.
I Hope I Find the strengh I Need to do this, But once more Thanks for being with me through this.........I'll be OK
Much Love & Respect
Dottie
