Frankie - thanks for your kind words. Actually I have never looked at it like that. I just have a lot of anger in me cos I find I can't tell people that I love and feel I should be able to tell like my family. I just know that if I do it may be one of the biggest mistakes of my life. But like you also mentioned I haven't told many people cos I coudn't risk loosing my job which would mean I would loose my home and be completly f**ked up.
It was 21 weeks last Wednesday. My bf is still using which I must say has not been easy but he starts his detox next week end. Hopefully things will improve all round after that.
Take care, and thanks again
Beck
I think you did the best thing, to go through the type of drama that comes with this sort of stuff is a hard thing to do. We only put up with it cuz it is our life at that moment. I just think that the people i know have suffered more than me, i was in control of it, all they could do was stand back and watch the show so to speak.
It must be hard with the BF using. I have been in the same place, on both sides aswell. I have been the clean half of the relationship waiting for an ex to catch me up, I have also been the one with the habit when my partner was clean.
Two people so close have a hard time doing their clucks together, you both know which buttons to press and if one of you's is gonna relapse, you both will. I found it just couldn't be done together, the only way was to do it one at a time. The only problem is you both have to be reading from the same page, if one isn't as commited as the other then.... well you know the rest.
I hope it all goes well in the next few weeks. Hope your BF has as much success as you have had. Good luck to both of you's. (even though you know luck has nothing to do with it)
Keep it up,,just for today.- thats how i look at everything now. No matter how bad things get - just for today - tomorrow can look after itself!
It must be hard with the BF using. I have been in the same place, on both sides aswell. I have been the clean half of the relationship waiting for an ex to catch me up, I have also been the one with the habit when my partner was clean.
Two people so close have a hard time doing their clucks together, you both know which buttons to press and if one of you's is gonna relapse, you both will. I found it just couldn't be done together, the only way was to do it one at a time. The only problem is you both have to be reading from the same page, if one isn't as commited as the other then.... well you know the rest.
I hope it all goes well in the next few weeks. Hope your BF has as much success as you have had. Good luck to both of you's. (even though you know luck has nothing to do with it)
Keep it up,,just for today.- thats how i look at everything now. No matter how bad things get - just for today - tomorrow can look after itself!
Hi Frankie - someone at last sees it as I do. We knew we couldn't detox at the same time that is why we didn't. I just didn't think it would take him this long to sort it out. Well I should have realised as he ain't the best at getting things done when asked. I just at the moment that each day is now getting harder the longer he is using. But this Saturday it starts for him. We shall see how he gets on. I'll keep you posted on how he gets on if interested.
Thanks again
Becks
Thanks again
Becks
Hi Becks, I'm hoping and pulling for you and your b/f this weekend when he begins his detox. I guess you know what to expect. I'm sorry to hear you sound vulnerable (don't mean to be presumptious htere). You've done an incredible thing these last 21-22 weeks. Cling dearly to that. COld comfort perhaps when living with a user. If he's not responsive, perhaps some is guilt, some is envy. Just please, never ever give up what you've accomplished. Hang tough...you've got what it takes! Beck
Becks
I dont envy your situation at all. Hopefully he,ll see how much you want things to work out for him, if not both of you together. At least you have 5 or so months and know what it took,(and is still taking)
Hope he is grateful for your help and understanding, and not resentful.
love
jack
I dont envy your situation at all. Hopefully he,ll see how much you want things to work out for him, if not both of you together. At least you have 5 or so months and know what it took,(and is still taking)
Hope he is grateful for your help and understanding, and not resentful.
love
jack
InTooDeep - Beck, thanks for your support. I think I'm going to need it. LOL. I just hope he is strong enough and wants it as much as I do. I bet this week will go really slow. And I need to get well before then so I can help him. Think I have glandular fever - great - just what I don't need. Plus a cold on top - but that has nearly gone now.
He reckons he will be on this site in a week or twos time. He has seen me here for hours at a time - so he maybe here himself soon.
Hope all is weel for you too.
Becks
xx
He reckons he will be on this site in a week or twos time. He has seen me here for hours at a time - so he maybe here himself soon.
Hope all is weel for you too.
Becks
xx
Jack - hi there. Hope you're well mate. As you may have read this weekend coming there will be another detox starting at my house. I hope for his sake as much as mine that we can both get through this. It hurts to think that maybe after 15 years we go our own ways if we don't get through this. Fingers crossed he can do.
He maybe posting here soon. If he does I would be very grateful if you could perhaps talk to him. I'll let you know anyway what happens.
Thanks again
Becks
He maybe posting here soon. If he does I would be very grateful if you could perhaps talk to him. I'll let you know anyway what happens.
Thanks again
Becks
becks,
just want to congratulate you on getting this far......you are an inspiration to alot of people on here and the way you have handled this has definitely inspired me........especially with you b/f using in the house you are in.has he started his treatment yet?
hope you are well....speak soon,
ruprect
just want to congratulate you on getting this far......you are an inspiration to alot of people on here and the way you have handled this has definitely inspired me........especially with you b/f using in the house you are in.has he started his treatment yet?
hope you are well....speak soon,
ruprect
Just read all your posts Becks.
You've done fantasticly well and should be so proud of yourself. I understand that keeping it all to yourself must be hard. My bloke feels that he doesn't trust anyone enough to talk about it and he carries this guilt around with him. We talk around the gear but never directly about it. He says he can't talk about it because it's not fair to land his sh*t on me and make me miserable as well.
But that makes it such a lonely road to walk along for us all.
Your b/f is lucky to have you there through his detox stay strong.
k
You've done fantasticly well and should be so proud of yourself. I understand that keeping it all to yourself must be hard. My bloke feels that he doesn't trust anyone enough to talk about it and he carries this guilt around with him. We talk around the gear but never directly about it. He says he can't talk about it because it's not fair to land his sh*t on me and make me miserable as well.
But that makes it such a lonely road to walk along for us all.
Your b/f is lucky to have you there through his detox stay strong.
k
You are all great. Thanks for the kind words. It does help when they aren't coming from anywhere/one else.
Think I may have glandular fever which explains why the last few weeks have been extremely hard. Sore throat, swollen glands, constantly sneezing and the hot flushes are back. Everytime I seenze it just reminds me of feelin' crap.
Although the last few months haven't been easy - today is the last of it. Tomorrow I am going to wake up, take control of my own life and worry about me for a change. I need to do this for me. As someone else reminded me.....whatever happens....one thing will remain.....me, me , me.
Thanks again guys
Becks
Think I may have glandular fever which explains why the last few weeks have been extremely hard. Sore throat, swollen glands, constantly sneezing and the hot flushes are back. Everytime I seenze it just reminds me of feelin' crap.
Although the last few months haven't been easy - today is the last of it. Tomorrow I am going to wake up, take control of my own life and worry about me for a change. I need to do this for me. As someone else reminded me.....whatever happens....one thing will remain.....me, me , me.
Thanks again guys
Becks
good on you becks.......sometimes the hardest decisions are the easiest......if you know what i mean.whatever you do,as long as its for you its the right thing to do.stay strong.
ruprect
ruprect
Hi all - went to the drs today about my throat and swollen glands. I haven't got glandular fever although the symptoms are similar. I got to get my blood done now and wait for the results.
ruprect - my partner starts his subs this Saturday (29th). So from the weekend onwards it's going to be a bit mad here. I remember when I did mine back in June, I took the subs after about 24 hours and they still put me into a full cluck. I hope this doesn't happen to him. But he has some time off work to get stable on them anyway. I hope it goes well too even if it's just for him.
I'll be here next week needing advice no doubt.
Cheers again
Becks
ruprect - my partner starts his subs this Saturday (29th). So from the weekend onwards it's going to be a bit mad here. I remember when I did mine back in June, I took the subs after about 24 hours and they still put me into a full cluck. I hope this doesn't happen to him. But he has some time off work to get stable on them anyway. I hope it goes well too even if it's just for him.
I'll be here next week needing advice no doubt.
Cheers again
Becks
good luck. All you can do is hope for the best and just be there. Hope he has an easier time than you did.
hi all im hoping to get some much needed support from you guys i was three years clean after 10 on the swag but relapsed aftewr a chain of events ive just started a subbie detx but i am fighting one hell of a fight with my dark side and its starting to affect my job and parents they think im doing well wich i suppose for me i am but mentlly its killing me so any support post on this site
THANKS CARL.
THANKS CARL.
Carl - welcome to the site. You will need to tell us more. What you are actually going through right now. How long have you been on the subs?
hi, ive just been and bough 30 8 mls subutexes does anyone know if you can just break them up and take lesseach day until 1 ml then stop?. how bads the withdrawel? ive been on 8 mls for 4 days, felt ruff for first 3 but its better than scoring in the rain and waking up ill wondering where you next moneys coming from. started work yesterday after using for 5 yrs. starting to feel great but really wont to be of for christmas. thanks and well done everyone its really encuraged me reading this site.
ps sorry about the spellling!!!
ps sorry about the spellling!!!
Hi. My name is Liz and I know that this forum is for supporting one another with drug addictions, but the reason I'm on here is a little different. I am a student interning at a drug rehabilitation center with women who are pregnant and recovering from cocaine and heroin addictions. I do therapy groups with them. I really want to know how to help them more, because it's very difficult. I just wanted to see if people wouldn't mind giving me some advice for what kinds of things are helpful for you so that I can better help them. Hope this isn't a bother, if it is in any way, just let me know.
Thanks,
Liz
Thanks,
Liz
Hi Liz. Congratulations on doing such a great job. So many people don't give a s** about heroin addicts, good for you. Wish I knew what advice to give but I'm in the very early stages of recovery myself. All I can say is let them talk and talk. Talking with others in the sameposition also helps a lot. That's why we're all on here encouraging each other.
Good luck x
Good luck x
HI everyone - this is to you all cos there are so many of you that have been giving me support. THANK YOU ALL. Im still here clean and trying to move on with things. It doesnt seem to be getting easier right now - it's getting harder again if anything but nothing can be worse than what I have been through before so as long as I keep that in mind I'll be okay. And the Nals keep me on the straight and narrow too.
Thanks all again.
Becks
Thanks all again.
Becks
steee
Welcome .Just so you know what I did, I went up to 16mg on the subs. I came down over about 4 weeks coming down 1mg every 2 days. You can break them up if you want to - I had to. Good luck. It's easier than you think coming off if you are stable and comfortable before you reduce. If you are not feelin' good before you reduce it could be a lot harder. So try to get enough subs each day so you can sleep a few hours each night (unless u r already) and you can function a normal day without feelin' crap. You might feel a bit weird but we all do coming off this s**t. remember this is just my experience and im no Dr. LOL.
Becks
Welcome .Just so you know what I did, I went up to 16mg on the subs. I came down over about 4 weeks coming down 1mg every 2 days. You can break them up if you want to - I had to. Good luck. It's easier than you think coming off if you are stable and comfortable before you reduce. If you are not feelin' good before you reduce it could be a lot harder. So try to get enough subs each day so you can sleep a few hours each night (unless u r already) and you can function a normal day without feelin' crap. You might feel a bit weird but we all do coming off this s**t. remember this is just my experience and im no Dr. LOL.
Becks
