Hello Everyone-
I am new to this message board and am really in need of some support right now. I have struggled with depression for years and along the way I discovered pain pills, particularly Vicoprofen , I have previously been addicted to vicoprofen and was able to come off of it, but at the present time I am back on the pills and I need to get off of them.
Over the summer my brother was killed and due to a lot of stress and looking for a way to escape the pain I started taking pills again. I have been taking vicoprofen now for about 3 or 4 months. I usually get a 60 pill supply and go through them in a week. However, I am so tired of running out and experiencing withdrawls and trying to get more from my doctor, which in itself is just an exhausting process, I have got to quit before I continue to spiral out of control.
So here's my question. It will be a week tomorrow since I got my last refill and I have already gone through 30 pills. I usually take 3-4 in the morning and then the same amount in the evening (it really varies from day to day, but I usually take around 7-8 a day right now) and of course my tolerance has built up and it requires more and more. I am ready to start tapering off. Today I have only had three. Can anyone give me any advice as to the best way to do this. I really don't want to discuss this with my doctor and the timing of all this is just terrible. Tomorrow morning is the first court date regarding my brother's death and I just really don't want to deal with these feelings but I've got to get control of my life before the pills take over even more than they already have. I would appreciate any advice any of you have to give.
I am also on xanax, which I am supposed to take 3 times a day
(.5mg), but pain pills are more my "thing" so I'm not quite as worried about the xanax since I don't even take them everyday. It's the pain pills that I have the real problem with.
I just need some support right now from others who know what this feels like...
Thanks-
Valley
Hi Valley!
Welcome to the board! There are many wonderful people here that will offer you their experience, strength and hope.
I am not a pill addict, my DOC is cocaine, so I can't give any advice, just a warm Hello!!!
Welcome to the board! There are many wonderful people here that will offer you their experience, strength and hope.
I am not a pill addict, my DOC is cocaine, so I can't give any advice, just a warm Hello!!!
Valley, I just did a taper from 6 a day. I started last Friday and was finished Thursday. You need to start cutting as far back as you can. If you can't do a fast taper like I, then another way to do this is to cut off one pill each week.
First week 8 pills
Second week 7 pills
Third week 6 pills
I think you get it. Good Luck and keep posting. It takes a strong person to taper. My husband left all of the pills out for me everyday. He said it was my choice to use or not to use and I chose the latter. Withdrawals were not bad either and trust me, I've gone cold turkey many times off of many drugs.
First week 8 pills
Second week 7 pills
Third week 6 pills
I think you get it. Good Luck and keep posting. It takes a strong person to taper. My husband left all of the pills out for me everyday. He said it was my choice to use or not to use and I chose the latter. Withdrawals were not bad either and trust me, I've gone cold turkey many times off of many drugs.
Welcome Valley, and congradulations on your decision to get clean. I absolutly know how you feel. All of us have been where you are now, in one degree or another.
From what you've written I see you're no stranger to w/d. Have you considered just flushing them and getting it over with? I know that might seem drastic to you but actually it's empowering.
Have you made a plan yet for staying clean?
That's really the toughest obstacle.
Best of luck to you,
Love, Kat
From what you've written I see you're no stranger to w/d. Have you considered just flushing them and getting it over with? I know that might seem drastic to you but actually it's empowering.
Have you made a plan yet for staying clean?
That's really the toughest obstacle.
Best of luck to you,
Love, Kat
Talk to your doctor. Why would you not want to be under supervised care?
Valley be careful about benzos much worsethan opiates. Bad combo--as you go through W/D you become anxious. I highly recomend you call your doctor and work a plan to get off opiates. Watch out for Xanax the worst of them all-Benzos
Jeff
Valley be careful about benzos much worsethan opiates. Bad combo--as you go through W/D you become anxious. I highly recomend you call your doctor and work a plan to get off opiates. Watch out for Xanax the worst of them all-Benzos
Jeff
Jeff, come on, she is not going to die from w/d off of this drug. She is not on Methadone or Heroin or other hard drugs. A little opiate w/d won't kill her.
Pam I had a friend who was taking pills DOC Coke never thought much of taking a few pills.
He is dead. You do not get it. NEVER SELF MEDICATE C/T is a fine way to get off opiates. My choice if possible but under medical supervision.
People die from drinking to much Tylenol PM and drop a benzo. You just do not hear about it. My Grandmother was in a coma for 4 days from tylenol Pm and benadryl. She Pucked up but got lucky and lived.
I just give my opinion. Some people have no choice as they have no doctors no insurance. but if you do? Use them it may save your life.
Jeff
He is dead. You do not get it. NEVER SELF MEDICATE C/T is a fine way to get off opiates. My choice if possible but under medical supervision.
People die from drinking to much Tylenol PM and drop a benzo. You just do not hear about it. My Grandmother was in a coma for 4 days from tylenol Pm and benadryl. She Pucked up but got lucky and lived.
I just give my opinion. Some people have no choice as they have no doctors no insurance. but if you do? Use them it may save your life.
Jeff
Jeff, I DO get it and I never told her to take another drug. I gave her advice on how to taper and that is just what she asked for. Believe me, I GET IT. Been there, done that, too many times. Yes, under a doctors supervision is the best way, but everyone does not have that option or a compassionate doctor that will help them. I've seen too many people be told by doctors to go home and do without and just suffer through the withdrawals. Like I said, opiate w/d will not kill a healthy person and she didn't say she was unhealthy, and she has suffered from w/d many times or so she said in her post. I just see an addict looking for a way to get clean. Also, being as how I just finished a taper and I DO have health issues, well, it did not kill me.
Also, I did not say anything about Tylenol PM or Benedryl or Coke or Xanax, you did and I would suggest that she ignore those medications and drugs and just do the taper. That's all, nothing more, nothing less. I did not intend to offend you but apparently I did. PEACE...
Also, I did not say anything about Tylenol PM or Benedryl or Coke or Xanax, you did and I would suggest that she ignore those medications and drugs and just do the taper. That's all, nothing more, nothing less. I did not intend to offend you but apparently I did. PEACE...
Thanks for the advice.
I am going to continue tapering off and deal with the xanax and other emotional issues next. I guess the one thing I feel bad about is that if it wasn't for me being out of pills I would still be taking them. So I definitely need some kind of plan when the pain pills are gone. I have also noticed that I feel more nauseated when i take the vicoprofen and I'm wondering how much of the changes in the it makes me feel is actually related to the xanax...
Thanks for all of your advice!
Valley
I am going to continue tapering off and deal with the xanax and other emotional issues next. I guess the one thing I feel bad about is that if it wasn't for me being out of pills I would still be taking them. So I definitely need some kind of plan when the pain pills are gone. I have also noticed that I feel more nauseated when i take the vicoprofen and I'm wondering how much of the changes in the it makes me feel is actually related to the xanax...
Thanks for all of your advice!
Valley
i hated being nailed to the cross of addiction, and i was for 36 years.
i am so free today, and i hope you truly find recovery too!
welcome!
i am so free today, and i hope you truly find recovery too!
welcome!
Valley,
I agree wholeheartedly with Jeff on this one. You must talk to a doctor to taper off Benzos. It's the most prudent decision, that's forsure. Anytime you want to talk, I'd be more than happy to offer what little I can. You'll make it through this. Good for you for making the first step and reaching out. There's a bunch of great people here and you'll figure that out for yourself.
G-d bless you and i wish you a smooth detox and taper.
I agree wholeheartedly with Jeff on this one. You must talk to a doctor to taper off Benzos. It's the most prudent decision, that's forsure. Anytime you want to talk, I'd be more than happy to offer what little I can. You'll make it through this. Good for you for making the first step and reaching out. There's a bunch of great people here and you'll figure that out for yourself.
G-d bless you and i wish you a smooth detox and taper.
Valley , may I ask why you have a script for these pills ?Are you taking them to feel good or are they needed for pain ?
I personally went the sub route to detox but I was also taking 80 mgs. of oxy per day .I still had a bad time of it so I don't suggest you go that way . Of course going through a doctor is the best way but I understand you may not want to do that .
I promise you that I am not preaching but I have to ask . What will you do once you get clean ? Would you consider meetings or at least some form of therapy ?
I am truly sorry to hear about your brother .His passing along with your addiction sounds overwhelming . You know you can get clean as you have done it before .Staying clean is where the real work begins . Take care and let us know how you are doing . Rob
I personally went the sub route to detox but I was also taking 80 mgs. of oxy per day .I still had a bad time of it so I don't suggest you go that way . Of course going through a doctor is the best way but I understand you may not want to do that .
I promise you that I am not preaching but I have to ask . What will you do once you get clean ? Would you consider meetings or at least some form of therapy ?
I am truly sorry to hear about your brother .His passing along with your addiction sounds overwhelming . You know you can get clean as you have done it before .Staying clean is where the real work begins . Take care and let us know how you are doing . Rob
Rob hit the nail on the head. Detoxing is simple next to the marathon that awaits us after. I strongly suggest that you have a plan in place to help you with the ongoing battle that's inevitably waiting for you. There are many options out there. Like many people on this site say, chase your recovery with the same relentlessness you chased your dealer or doc for the dope. You can and will do this. We're most definitely here to help but this site is one tool of many to help you lead a smooth life again. I wish you the best of luck.
bump
I'm very sorry about your brother. I lost mine as well. It cuts deep.
If you taper, have a finite number of pills left and cut off your sources. What worked for me was to cut to one dose a day -- start with whatever quantity still gives you a high. I found that i could get through any day as long as I knew I'd get a few hours relief each night. Stay on that dose for 3-4 days, then deplete by one, go another 3-4 days, etc. Once you're down to 3-4, I'd recommend just flushinhg whatever you have left -- it's an incredible feeling to take your life back. Also, I'd recommend making a pact w/yourself that If you break/exceed your taper on any given day, you'll flush the rest -- otherwise, it'll just give you permission to do it again, and prolong the whole ordeal. You'll have a couple of days with flu like suystems, but it's not life-threatening.
The Xanax is another deal. For me, I had to get clean of all mind-altering drugs like opiates and benzos -- if I took one a way, I'd start abusing the other eventually. Anything in a pinch......but benzo withdrawal should be done under medical supervision.
Once you've got your life back, please strongly consider getting and following a plan to stay clean. For most of us, the mental addiction has been the most insidious and hardest to overcome. Many have found the spiritual solution offered by AA/NA to be very effective. Others have begun their journey with out-patient programs or addiction counseling specialists. Whatever your route, please try to get some help -- the investment may save you years and years of futility. If you're in therapy already, coming clean with your therapist is a great place to start -- and a tremendous relief. We tend to be a s sick as our secrets. Good luck. None
If you taper, have a finite number of pills left and cut off your sources. What worked for me was to cut to one dose a day -- start with whatever quantity still gives you a high. I found that i could get through any day as long as I knew I'd get a few hours relief each night. Stay on that dose for 3-4 days, then deplete by one, go another 3-4 days, etc. Once you're down to 3-4, I'd recommend just flushinhg whatever you have left -- it's an incredible feeling to take your life back. Also, I'd recommend making a pact w/yourself that If you break/exceed your taper on any given day, you'll flush the rest -- otherwise, it'll just give you permission to do it again, and prolong the whole ordeal. You'll have a couple of days with flu like suystems, but it's not life-threatening.
The Xanax is another deal. For me, I had to get clean of all mind-altering drugs like opiates and benzos -- if I took one a way, I'd start abusing the other eventually. Anything in a pinch......but benzo withdrawal should be done under medical supervision.
Once you've got your life back, please strongly consider getting and following a plan to stay clean. For most of us, the mental addiction has been the most insidious and hardest to overcome. Many have found the spiritual solution offered by AA/NA to be very effective. Others have begun their journey with out-patient programs or addiction counseling specialists. Whatever your route, please try to get some help -- the investment may save you years and years of futility. If you're in therapy already, coming clean with your therapist is a great place to start -- and a tremendous relief. We tend to be a s sick as our secrets. Good luck. None
I have been slowly getting off of Vicodin. I tapered very slowly. I was taking about 8-10 a day. It is not easy. This hibby-jeebez going crazy feeling has still not stopped. I also wake up at 3:30-4:00 every day (and I work). I think I could feel better if I could sleep. I do take a sleeping pill, but I still wake up after about 5-6 hours every day. I don't think there is a way to do this without suffering. I noticed that one person on this site was even married to a doctor--and she still suffered W/Ds. Wouldn't you think in this day and age that there would be an easy way? It is so hard. I have been 2 days without any pills and the 3 days before that I only had one a day. I have been suffering (no flu symtoms) for 14 days. All we want to know is when will this feeling end? We are reaching out to others to find an end to this.
Thanks to all for the replies--
To answer some of the questions- I first started taking pain pills (vicoprofen) 3 years ago for a back injury. I some how ended up with a doctor that would just keep prescribing them for me and was on them for about 6 months. My husband found a church for us and it was through that and accupuncture that I detoxed.
I had not been back to this doctor since coming off of the pills because I knew I would be tempted. I found a new doctor and he is the type to not give pain pills so freely. My brother was killed in July and I couldn't sleep and so I went to my old doctor just to get ambien (which I had taken in the past with no problems). However, a week later the thought entered my head- "Hey, life is miserable why not just call and see if you can get a script for something for pain"
So that's what I did. I simply told them I had hurt my back and without question the meds were called in for me.
I've been back on the vicoprofen since early September. I go through 60 pills in a week. However, I have been more careful with the last bottle because I know he won't give me anymore, because technically I should just now be ready for the next one to be filled and I'm already out. Well, actually I tapered down this week, althought not as well as I should have. I took 6 some days and then 3 for two days and today I had 1 and tomorrow I will take the last remaining pill.
I have been through withdrawl before and it is such a scary place emotionally and physically. I am hoping it won't be very bad this time, but at this point I don't know.
I know that if I could get more pills right now I probably would. I see a therapist for depression, but he doesn't really give me very much advice regarding the pills, other than it will take me being ready to quit to actually do it and he tells me he's worried.
I'm just really scared right now. I have tried as hard as I can to mentally prepare myself for the next few days.
The xanax I have not been taking much of, because I have felt the feeling of panic when I have gone a long time without taking it and it's terrible. And, really the only reason I ever take it is to help me sleep some. It really does nothing else for me and in fact makes my depression worse (which I'm on lexapro for, after trying every med out there).
So, that's pretty much the story and it makes me feel better to know that there are other people out there who can identify with the feelings I am having right now.
--Valley
To answer some of the questions- I first started taking pain pills (vicoprofen) 3 years ago for a back injury. I some how ended up with a doctor that would just keep prescribing them for me and was on them for about 6 months. My husband found a church for us and it was through that and accupuncture that I detoxed.
I had not been back to this doctor since coming off of the pills because I knew I would be tempted. I found a new doctor and he is the type to not give pain pills so freely. My brother was killed in July and I couldn't sleep and so I went to my old doctor just to get ambien (which I had taken in the past with no problems). However, a week later the thought entered my head- "Hey, life is miserable why not just call and see if you can get a script for something for pain"
So that's what I did. I simply told them I had hurt my back and without question the meds were called in for me.
I've been back on the vicoprofen since early September. I go through 60 pills in a week. However, I have been more careful with the last bottle because I know he won't give me anymore, because technically I should just now be ready for the next one to be filled and I'm already out. Well, actually I tapered down this week, althought not as well as I should have. I took 6 some days and then 3 for two days and today I had 1 and tomorrow I will take the last remaining pill.
I have been through withdrawl before and it is such a scary place emotionally and physically. I am hoping it won't be very bad this time, but at this point I don't know.
I know that if I could get more pills right now I probably would. I see a therapist for depression, but he doesn't really give me very much advice regarding the pills, other than it will take me being ready to quit to actually do it and he tells me he's worried.
I'm just really scared right now. I have tried as hard as I can to mentally prepare myself for the next few days.
The xanax I have not been taking much of, because I have felt the feeling of panic when I have gone a long time without taking it and it's terrible. And, really the only reason I ever take it is to help me sleep some. It really does nothing else for me and in fact makes my depression worse (which I'm on lexapro for, after trying every med out there).
So, that's pretty much the story and it makes me feel better to know that there are other people out there who can identify with the feelings I am having right now.
--Valley
Valley, have you thought any about getting involved in AA/NA or any other support groups? You can't do this alone. This site is excellant to talk to others when nobody else is around but, meetings are the answer for me. Do you have a sponser? Do you go to meetings already? Keep posting, your doing great. It does get better.
Hi Vally..
Sounds like your sick and tired of being sick and tired, huh?
Are you sure that dr won't give you anymore? Before you waste time and energy on yet another detox, you have to make sure you can't get any more pills. Because that moment will come when you think you can't do this and you'll be drug seeking.
Tell that dr straight up to never prescrible for you again. Tell him you'll turn him in if he does. Then do the same thing at every pharmacy you use.
Just how bad do you want this? You have to go to any length to get it. Once you're off the pills, you'll need to make yourself safe. No one else is going to do it for you.
You need support right now. Trying to do this alone is hard and not necessary. There's nothing to be ashamed of. Reach out. Have you thought about NA or AA?
I don't know anything about tapering. It never worked for me. If the pills were within reach, I took them. I had to finally flush what I had left and just go for it. That was a year and a half ago.
Cowgirl
Sounds like your sick and tired of being sick and tired, huh?
Are you sure that dr won't give you anymore? Before you waste time and energy on yet another detox, you have to make sure you can't get any more pills. Because that moment will come when you think you can't do this and you'll be drug seeking.
Tell that dr straight up to never prescrible for you again. Tell him you'll turn him in if he does. Then do the same thing at every pharmacy you use.
Just how bad do you want this? You have to go to any length to get it. Once you're off the pills, you'll need to make yourself safe. No one else is going to do it for you.
You need support right now. Trying to do this alone is hard and not necessary. There's nothing to be ashamed of. Reach out. Have you thought about NA or AA?
I don't know anything about tapering. It never worked for me. If the pills were within reach, I took them. I had to finally flush what I had left and just go for it. That was a year and a half ago.
Cowgirl
I understand all of your advice. Quite, frankly if I knew I could get more now I would even knowing the path it will lead me down. I took my last pill today and the worst part of not having the pills is the emotional, although the physical is bad, I don't handle the emotional side very well. I start turning to my old escapes whether it is self-harm (cutting), or vomiting. There is always something. I am constantly trying to run away. But the pills just make everything okay, even if it's only temporary. I don't know if I'm ready to take the steps. Honestly, I will proabably be calling around tomorrow to get anything with hydrocodone. I feel like I am so weak and such a waste. The people in my life think I'm great and have such potential and I see none of it. I have such great things going for me, a wonderful family, I am able to go to college and have excelled and am currently majoring in psychology. Yet, I can never seem to get anything together.
