I got back from my dear sweet friend's funeral.
I was able to plug in to AA while I was away...it saved my life. To know I could walk into the rooms and let people know how much I was hurting and get good sober energy.
It was a blessing being there for her family, and her husband. He didn't go to meetings with me but he saw me going...hopefully that will stick with him. At least I can be a good example.
Unfortunately I flew home Thursday...in the midst of all of the "Terror in the Sky" madness...the airports were having mad delays.
I ended up finally getting home around 4 am and had to be at work around noon the next day. I tried my best to get my game face on...but I was sooo mentally and emotionally drained.... so plain exhausted.... that when I got to work I just lost it and couldn't stop crying.Thank Goodness for my boss....she sent me home and I slept that day, got up to eat and hit a meeting and went back to bed. Got up this morning...hit a meeting and went to work. Today I felt almost human and was able to lose myself a bit in work.
So for now, I'm going to get lots of rest, go to a meeting everyday, go to work, and put one foot in front of the other. One day at a time, one hour at a time, one minute at a time and get through this with the help of AA.
I'm real sad...but thats ok...because I am feeling the pain, not stuffing it or numbing it. And in this pain...I am growing. I have to believe that and I have to have faith that it will get better...it has too.
Carolyn
Hey Avondale Girl:)
I counted at least 20 examples of gratitude and things getting better in your post, it works if we work at it and you are. Addiction wants you to doubt the process but in posting you have a brilliant example of how it works. And usually with hindsight we see how God is doing for us What we could not do for ourselves......I've seen that as a signature somewhere:)
Keep up the good work C and as you know god is with us where ever we go.
Light and love zac
I counted at least 20 examples of gratitude and things getting better in your post, it works if we work at it and you are. Addiction wants you to doubt the process but in posting you have a brilliant example of how it works. And usually with hindsight we see how God is doing for us What we could not do for ourselves......I've seen that as a signature somewhere:)
Keep up the good work C and as you know god is with us where ever we go.
Light and love zac
thank you Zac...one day @a time right? :)
C and Zac, (I sent you an email message to you C)...I'm listening to "30 days in the Hole" by Humble Pie, my life use to be "365 days in the Hole" when I was drinking and using. Carolyn thank you for sharing your positiveness, your gratitude, your sadness too...I know I've mentioned it before but you are a bright shining example of the Program of AA in action...recovery at it's finest...we don't drink and we don't use no matter what....I so thankful for the both of you and your words of wisdom and sharing how the Program is working in both of your lives.
Hi Carolyn
I have missed you too :). I was so saddened to read about your friend. It sounds like you are getting through each day as it needs to be.
Staying focussed and experiencing your grief.
you are in my thoughts.
Idgie.
I have missed you too :). I was so saddened to read about your friend. It sounds like you are getting through each day as it needs to be.
Staying focussed and experiencing your grief.
you are in my thoughts.
Idgie.
Thanks Idgie,
I read your response on Zacs post. I'm proud of you and glad to see you are on the right path. I have faith in you girl.
Thank you for the kind words.
Carolyn
I read your response on Zacs post. I'm proud of you and glad to see you are on the right path. I have faith in you girl.
Thank you for the kind words.
Carolyn
Hey Carolyn, How ya doin' tonight? Just checkin' the boards after a pretty hectic day...but nothing that I needed to drink over. Still owe you an email msg.
Hey Vw,
Still puttin one foot in front of the other.One day at a time seems to be working.
Going through the process, hittin meetings,talking to a counseler, being good to myself (bubble baths and ice cream). Thats how I'm getting through this.
The love and support of the women in AA as well.
Your'e a good friend.
C
Still puttin one foot in front of the other.One day at a time seems to be working.
Going through the process, hittin meetings,talking to a counseler, being good to myself (bubble baths and ice cream). Thats how I'm getting through this.
The love and support of the women in AA as well.
Your'e a good friend.
C
