Ot- Daughter

Pain Pills
1
I think I mentioned this before. My daughters boyfriend, normally a wonderful kid (and Im not kidding) Extremely bright (well, not in this case), very polite, college student, responsible job, goes to church, blah blah..normal suburban kid..good parents, good background, never much trouble,

He and my daughter and are love. I mean, not the puppy love stuff but the real thing and are probably going to get married. You know, the whole early 20's, the whole life ahead of us stuff...both finishing college next year.

I mentioned this before, but this kid, around 8 months ago, got into a whole LOT of trouble. He and one of his friends went on some insane vandalism spree and caused a lot of damage. Try $60,000.00 worth of damage.

His case has been continued 3 times and I think tomorrow is D-Day.

Well, I was at the courthouse last Wednesday for business and decided to check the status of his case (which you can due via terminals there). Well, he doesn't have a single charge of vandalism (it's called Crimminal Damage to Property). He has a total of TWELVE different charges (all commited the same night) but 12 seperate counts.

I was shocked. I was told it was a single charge. One town, thhere are 6 charges, another town 3 charges and the last town 3 charges.

Anyway, his charges each are Class 4 felonies, with 1-2 years in jail (I assume on each count..maybe someone can clarify for me).

My daughter seems to think he is going to get out of it.

I called my ex this afternoon to discuss this, and she also seems to think it will be fine. Her points were:

1. He's a good kid (aren't we all?)
2. He goes to a Christian College (..and?)
3. His parents paid restitution (again..that doesn't get rid of an indictment)
4. He has no previous record (actually he does, trespassing)
5. The other guy did it all (sure he did..my theory is after the first one, he could of gone home..not drive around to three seperate towns and smash stuff up)

My ex's husband said "Kids will be kids". My ex said "Well, if the judge wanted to through him in jail he would have..it's been continued 2 times, he will get off..he's a Christian..blah blah..see above).

My reply was "He has 12 felony counts against him. It is going to take a miracle to keep him out of jail. Prepare to help (daughters name) through this because she is going to need emotional support tomorrow."

My ex seems to think since it was vandalism, it's not THAT serious. I seem to think a felony charge is a felony charge. Isn't that kind of why THERE ARE felonies?

Am I over-reacting on this?

My daughter and thhe b-friend were here yesterday and I didn't say anything because I don't want to upset her but I am scared out of my wits on this for her. I can't bear seeing my daughter hurt and if this guy DOES go to jail, her life with him is screwed. A Class 4 is a minimum 1 year in jail. I tried explaining to my ex that it was for EACH count, not cumulative, meaning, if he is convicted, he could at a minimum be sentenced to 12 years in jail. This is one HUGE mess and I am neverous as hell about this.

My daughter is not even going to court because she thinks it's no big deal. Supposedly, the kids has a good lawyer.

What do you guys think?




2
Danny, I think if this is his first offense he can apply for a/r. Not sure though. Good luck and try not to worry. His case will probably get continued again tommorrow if your court system in Ill. is anything like Ct. Shantel
3
Danny...
I have no insight to the legal matters but I know vandalism is a big deal in California...Hopefully, he does have a great attorney as that seems to make the difference where I live...

I just want you to know I think you are a great dad and I will pray for you & your daughter tomorrow...

Take care,
Stacey
4
Danny I don not thing your over reacting at all. Its sick. This man is going to commit to your daughter to protect her? love her etc and he is out destroying other people s property. Vandalism is serious offense.

Shantel First offense? You think this is his first time? Lets say it was would you want him as a Son in Law? JMHO but Not me for my daughter.

Vandalism is a teenager phase -college that's sick. This man is facing some serious jail time.

I love when people write its there first offense when 9out of ten times its there first time getting caught.

trespassing what was he doing on someone else's property?

Danny that's a tough place for your you to be. Your daughter is going to have to figure it out for herself.
5
I don't think you're over-reacting, Danny. Are you going to share what you know with your daughter at some point? It doesn't sound like her BF has given her the entire story and if she's going to marry the man, I think she needs to know what you know. I'm not saying that she shouldn't marry him -- that's her decision -- but I would want my child to go into this with all the information available, eyes open. However, love is blind, and sometimes deaf and dumb as well.

I'm sorry you have to deal with this. I'm sorry for her as well.
6
Ya, I already told her. Weeks ago...well, not the 12 charge thing, but told her Crimminal Damage to Property is a felony. See, her Mom is really minimizing this, which is wrong. So is her step-dad. I spoke to her brohter today and told him the situation. She won't listen. Another problem is I am not supposed to know. The BF was afraid to tell me for some reason. If he knew that I did know, I would be in court tomorrow myself to see what happens and offer some support. I am pretty freaked. I mean, I;ve known about this for a while, but not that the charges were so extensive and tomorrow I think is D-day (unless continued again..for the 3rd or 4th time)
7
Danny, You were in my thoughts today. How did court go? Shantel
8
Another continuance..I just found out..something is up I think though because I called my daughter 5 times and she didn't call back and her mother told me...

I'm going to the courthouse tomorrow to check it out..