Hi everyone!
So I have been dating a guy name Marcus and we have been Together for the last year and a half. This month will be a year that he has been sober and clean. Since he's been back from rehab last year in August we have been on and off for two months and he called it off on me. I was hurt and in pain but got it together. A month later he calls me saying how I'm doing and that he misses me and he's sorry. We hang out thay day and it was fine. The next day I called him twice and no answer. I show up to his house because I was comfortable and thought it was okay to talk to him to see what was wrong. He ended up freaking out and made a whole scene. So we stop talking again. Then a month and a half passes by and he calls me again like nothing happened. Same thing. Asking how I'm doing and he's sorry and he misses me and this time he wanted to work things out with me. He said that he's ready and that he knows what he wants. I was afraid to give him another chance but he begged me please let me get this once chance to prove to you. So I did. Everything was better and good until this past Saturday night he said he had a hard week and he was really tired from work he told me he didn't want to see me or talk to me anymore. He kept saying I'm not the right one, he feels sufficated, doesn't feel free, isn't ready for a relationship, and that he doesn't have time. (not the first time he's said this before either) he ended up hurting me again. I trust him and believed him. So I don't understand why he keeps running away and later he eventually comes back to me? Playing games? He's lost and confused? He did tell me that when he doesn't know what to do or doesn't know what he wants he runs, and runs far. He doesn't know how to face problems or feelings. I just don't get it and I just need help and advice. Want to know what he's thinking or what' he's going through? I have no idea.
Thank you!
All relationships are difficult at times. Relationships with addicts are more than difficult. If this is what you want in a relationship continue it, or you need to break it off permanently..You may try counseling together to help find out what the underlying issues are with him and maybe you but at least it will help understand one another..If he is not willing to do this you pretty much know where you stand. Do you live together ? Share a house payment ? Have a child? Share responsibilities ? Thats a real relationship. Or just dating ? You can date other people, he's not serious. Seems unreliable to your heart and needs. Don't you want more? Comes back to the same old thing, nothing changes unless something changes.
I was doing counseling and she pretty much told me to stay away from him because he's no good for me. I stop going because I was in a good place with myself at the time and he called me the next day. It's like evil comes to your life and testes you when you're good. Anyway, we don't live together or have a child or anything like that. We were in a serious relationship but since he got out of rehab he's been like this with me. It's exhusting and not healthy. I told him to stop playing games and coming and out of my life. It's not okay. I know he will call me again but I need to put my foot down. He has dated other girls but wasnt interested and he would compare them to me. I didn't date anyone because I knew I wasn't ready. I met other guys but I wasn't interested. I'm not too sure what to do when he calls me again? I know this is what I don't want and we both have strong feelings for each other but I think we just need to know what is going on so I can understand him if he lets me. Counseling sounds like a good idea for the both of us but we aren't married so I don't think he would be up for that. He's pretty honest and open when he's going through hard times. But his feelings are always mixed. He will miss me and loves me and the next week he doesn't find any interest.
My girl and I are not married but we still went to counseling to try to understand one another especially, all the lies and the deceit or basically just games she played with me. We stopped because of a legal matter but may resume. Now there is the fact I learned that she cheated on me at the end of December when we were taking a little break for her to get herself and her addiction under control and start her recovery. Something I thought would be best for her to do on her own to have more value. All of this has really broke my heart and crushed my ego. I'm not an arrogant prick but I have a lot of haters. I have much going for me, cool good paying jobs ,nice house,multiple cool cars, well respected wherever I go and have a ton of character and charm. I'm with this girl because our whole relationship started as a random friendship and we are very good together. I had a hard time with the fact that she is half my age. I won't deny that I love her and thought we would just have a couple years together having some fun and helping each other through a couple rough spots. She or we ended up pregnant Dec. 2013. Did not really think it was my child. I did not know how monogamous she was. I had quit seeing other girls a few months earlier when she moved in with me and after we were together for 9 months but again thought we were just having fun..I could not take the chance of not being with her during her pregnancy if it was my child. So I took care of her the best I possibly could. Spoiled and pampered her, went to every doctor's appointment ,birthing classes, breastfeeding classes, built a beautiful nursery with everything possible. Still not knowing if it was my child..Being in the car business, I did some wheeling and dealing got rid of one of my toys to buy a Mercedes SUV . Ultimately she give up all of this for her pills. MY ex thought this girl was crazy to give up life with me. I had no idea what addiction was and how powerful it is. I had met my match. Now I'm going to be the best Dad to my 6 month-old princess. My first child at 50. THE door to my life is open to her if she can stay sober be honest and regain my trust. I wanted her in my life but I have to continue with my life. She is not responsible for my happiness.
Nessxxo. Not sure if h still go on this but ur story is like mine!!! It's so sad and heartbreaking. How is it going now?
