Hi All,
I just wondered if anyone else out in Alcoholic land feels the way I do sometimes. I have been finding myself getting increasingly pissed off at my friends who are able to drink socially. They always say something like do you mind if I have a drink? No I really don't but for some reason it irritates me that they even ask. Are they really going to not have a drink if I say I don't want them to? NO! I guess I am just bitter. It's not their fault that I am a drunk. I'm just having a bad day, but I won't drink today!
Valarie
i guess it's normal to feel resentful when other people can have something that you can't. I used to feel that way whenever my sister got pregnant, because I had been trying for 6 years. What was she supposed to do? Not have children because I couldn't get pregnant? Same thing I guess, but I eventualy had kids, so that's in my past, but just wanted to tell you that it's normal to feel the way you do.
Mas,
Thanks for the encouragement. I was feeling like a real B, and that was kind of making me feel like drinking. I appreciate the help! Take care Mas from Chicago.... Keep posting...it helps!
Valarie in So California
Thanks for the encouragement. I was feeling like a real B, and that was kind of making me feel like drinking. I appreciate the help! Take care Mas from Chicago.... Keep posting...it helps!
Valarie in So California
Hi Val
YES I feel this way a lot. Anger and resentment. Here's a quote for you.
"Often anger is not about the other person, it is about yourself. Close your mouth and open your ears, you must and you will find what your true heart is seeking."
For me I think its about finding peace. Although on the surface I'm resentful of the fact that I can't enjoy a nice glass of wine with my dinner like my parents can. Or have a couple of cocktails and then "its enough" like my friends can. I think underneath I'm really resentful of the fact that I don't have peace and calm in my life. Alcohol makes things boil in my head, I can't have peace when I drink, and it seems I can't have it half the time when I'm sober either.
Of course we live in a society that revolves around rituals involving alcohol, when we can't participate in a "normal" way we feel like outcasts and so become resentful.
I think this is true of many angers and resentments that we carry, you've got to look beneath the surface to what is below.
Maybe talk to your friends about it. If you'd prefer them not to drink around you, just tell them that. If you don't care if they do, tell them to go ahead and drink and not check with you first all the time.
take care Val stay strong
Idgie
YES I feel this way a lot. Anger and resentment. Here's a quote for you.
"Often anger is not about the other person, it is about yourself. Close your mouth and open your ears, you must and you will find what your true heart is seeking."
For me I think its about finding peace. Although on the surface I'm resentful of the fact that I can't enjoy a nice glass of wine with my dinner like my parents can. Or have a couple of cocktails and then "its enough" like my friends can. I think underneath I'm really resentful of the fact that I don't have peace and calm in my life. Alcohol makes things boil in my head, I can't have peace when I drink, and it seems I can't have it half the time when I'm sober either.
Of course we live in a society that revolves around rituals involving alcohol, when we can't participate in a "normal" way we feel like outcasts and so become resentful.
I think this is true of many angers and resentments that we carry, you've got to look beneath the surface to what is below.
Maybe talk to your friends about it. If you'd prefer them not to drink around you, just tell them that. If you don't care if they do, tell them to go ahead and drink and not check with you first all the time.
take care Val stay strong
Idgie
Idgie,
Thank you for the great words of wisdom. I knew that my anger was all about me but as usual I was trying to blame others. It's what I do best. I am doing great in spite of myself. On June 6th it will be 9 months no booze. Cool huh? Well take care and thank you for your words!
Peace,
Valarie
Thank you for the great words of wisdom. I knew that my anger was all about me but as usual I was trying to blame others. It's what I do best. I am doing great in spite of myself. On June 6th it will be 9 months no booze. Cool huh? Well take care and thank you for your words!
Peace,
Valarie
Hi,
I can't say it bothers me at all. I guess because I really don't want it anymore. It doesn't even look appealing to me. Also, I really can't think of anyone I hang with today that drinks. I have a few friends that I know drink, but I never really see them anymore, not for any reason, we just all have our own lives today. And as far as the "Drinking Buddies" I had, well, thats exactly what they were and I don't see or hear from them, which is fine with me.
But I've accepted my disease and I know I can't drink, but the best part is I don't want to, and I don't have to either.
Take care........
Bob
I can't say it bothers me at all. I guess because I really don't want it anymore. It doesn't even look appealing to me. Also, I really can't think of anyone I hang with today that drinks. I have a few friends that I know drink, but I never really see them anymore, not for any reason, we just all have our own lives today. And as far as the "Drinking Buddies" I had, well, thats exactly what they were and I don't see or hear from them, which is fine with me.
But I've accepted my disease and I know I can't drink, but the best part is I don't want to, and I don't have to either.
Take care........
Bob
Val almost 9 months - WOW I didn't realise you had that long - that's fantastic. You go girl. Wow you are awesome.
Bob - its great you feel that way - I hope one day I will feel like that too. It must be a very peaceful feeling.
Bob - its great you feel that way - I hope one day I will feel like that too. It must be a very peaceful feeling.
Congratulations on 9 months Valarie! Terrific!
I've been told that resentment is something that I cannot afford to hold on to...it most likely would take me back out there...resentment, for me, is a relapse in the making.
I've been told that resentment is something that I cannot afford to hold on to...it most likely would take me back out there...resentment, for me, is a relapse in the making.
