Our son is 37 he is addicted to pain pills, we have been trying to help him get sober & out of trouble. We know that he is headed to prison because he owes a large fine, his Dad gave him the money to pay it but of course the money is gone.....all for pills. We live 12 hrs. away so this is not something that we see on a day to day basis, but we know he how much he needs help & also how broke he is. He has no internet acess so I am sending him your emails so he knows he is not alone. Thank you, your trials & your efforts to help & support each other is wonderful I wish you all sucess....you can do it.putsy
Hi Putsy .I really wish I knew how to help but the fact is , I don't .Once a Mom , always a Mom . My Mother brought up 8 of us and I assure you she had her hands full .Five of us have addiction problems . We all had to find our own way to get clean .I personally had twelve years of sobriety by going to meetings .I relapsed after I stopped going to the same meetings that kept me sober .We are very lucky in that all my siblings have all found a way to stay clean. My parents tried everything to get us help but it was not until we were ready that we were able to get help for ourselves . Has your son tried going to a rehab ? I am just rambling here .I just did not want you to feel ignored .I wish I had something constuctive to say but I am at a loss . I just understand how hard it must be for you to see your son in so much pain .Maybe someone will come along with advice .My prayers are with you .Keep us posted on his progress , Rob
Putsy, Hey and welcome to the board! He sure isn't alone! THere are many of us here who are opiate addicts and know the hell he is living. I am sorry for you to have to worry about this. Addiction doesn't have to rule his life and yours though.
What is his drug of choice? How long has be been addicted? What has he done to get clean?
You are more than welcome here anytime! Have you also been to the Friends/Family board? There are many parents there with the same problems as you which you may find interesting to talk to.
We could give him more info if we knew the answers to the questions above, if you don't mind telling us. : )
Take care and best wishes in dealing with this.
What is his drug of choice? How long has be been addicted? What has he done to get clean?
You are more than welcome here anytime! Have you also been to the Friends/Family board? There are many parents there with the same problems as you which you may find interesting to talk to.
We could give him more info if we knew the answers to the questions above, if you don't mind telling us. : )
Take care and best wishes in dealing with this.
Prison... rehab... whatever works. Though from experience in my field I know drugs are as easy to score in prison (not county jail) as on the streets.
Mom: dont beat yourself up. I assure you, unless you to were/are an addict or alcoholic you have no reason to feel as if you failed your son. He has been making his own decisions for about as long as I have been alive, practically.
Mom: dont beat yourself up. I assure you, unless you to were/are an addict or alcoholic you have no reason to feel as if you failed your son. He has been making his own decisions for about as long as I have been alive, practically.
Dear Sad Mom,
I'm had more than my share of days being a sad mom since I found out in September of 2004 that my 29 year old son is a heroin addict. He started out on vicodin, then went to oxycontin (synthetic heroin), and then to heroin because it was cheaper. He is about $50,000 in debt and he has gotten into trouble with the law to support his habit...never was a dealer though...thank God for that. He still has legal consequences to face, BUT he is ALIVE!!!! That is what is important. He went to rehab and then a partial, and now he is in intensive outpatient treatment. He has 100 days clean of heroin as of yesterday (to the best of our knowledge). That is something to be very proud of. He's had some minor relapses, but got right back to meetings. He's only missed 2 due to illness during those 100 days! There is hope, but as you can see from my son's story, the addict often has to hit bottom before they get the help they need. One thing I would like you to remember...I learned this at the family session we attended at the rehab..."YOU didn't cause it, YOU can't control it, and YOU can't cure it. You can pray for your son to have the strength to get free of it. You can go to alanon meetings to help you deal with this. One mistake I made early on what to keep his addiction a secret. As time went on I realized how much he needed prayer to fight this, and I told people I knew would pray for him. May God give you peace someday soon!
I understand completely what you're going through and I will pray for you and your son.
Love,
Susan
I'm had more than my share of days being a sad mom since I found out in September of 2004 that my 29 year old son is a heroin addict. He started out on vicodin, then went to oxycontin (synthetic heroin), and then to heroin because it was cheaper. He is about $50,000 in debt and he has gotten into trouble with the law to support his habit...never was a dealer though...thank God for that. He still has legal consequences to face, BUT he is ALIVE!!!! That is what is important. He went to rehab and then a partial, and now he is in intensive outpatient treatment. He has 100 days clean of heroin as of yesterday (to the best of our knowledge). That is something to be very proud of. He's had some minor relapses, but got right back to meetings. He's only missed 2 due to illness during those 100 days! There is hope, but as you can see from my son's story, the addict often has to hit bottom before they get the help they need. One thing I would like you to remember...I learned this at the family session we attended at the rehab..."YOU didn't cause it, YOU can't control it, and YOU can't cure it. You can pray for your son to have the strength to get free of it. You can go to alanon meetings to help you deal with this. One mistake I made early on what to keep his addiction a secret. As time went on I realized how much he needed prayer to fight this, and I told people I knew would pray for him. May God give you peace someday soon!
I understand completely what you're going through and I will pray for you and your son.
Love,
Susan
SADMOM i really feel for you aand hope your son one day realises he hsa a mom who loves and cares for him Most addicts loose their parents through thier addiction he is very lucky he has you there If i was you i wouldnt at the moment trust anything he says nor give him any money again If he does go to prison find out how much they are allowed and whats the minium amount they can live on inside thats if you did want to send him any. I would only give him the minium amount and not very often either It may be a blessing in disguise has he ever been in prison before? You never know where he isnt no spring chicken any more he might hate it that much that this may make him change his ways (fingers crossed) It wont be easy for any of you but i know through my own experiance( iwas addicted to herion and now on subutex) that its best to be cruel to be kind to him as hard as it may be at times but like someone else said he may need to hit rock bottom before he gets help but thats not always the case i didnt nearly but not quite i still managed to keep my children and my parents I hope this helps and wish you luck x x x
