I am considering flying to AZ and going to the section of the city where my son usually goes according to those who know his routine. I have filed a missing persons report,after checking the hospitals and jail to determine if he has been a patient,a John Doe or arrested, which so far seems to be a negative. A wonderful policeman helped me with the missing person report and provided some insight. He said the area he goes to is what they call the shooting galleries and is a rough part of the city. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can go about these areas and try to find him? Is it risky for me? Is this a good plan? Its been two days since anyone has heard from him and this is not his way at all. He has always touched base with someone who cares about him. If anyone has any experience doing this type of search "mission" please share.
Thankyou
Im very sorry that you have to be put through this.
I would not do this because it puts you in danger!
If you must I wouldnt go anywhere alone.Bring preferably a man with you.
Good luck ,I will say a prayer for you and your family.
I hope others will post in now and be able to give you more advice.
Ava
I would not do this because it puts you in danger!
If you must I wouldnt go anywhere alone.Bring preferably a man with you.
Good luck ,I will say a prayer for you and your family.
I hope others will post in now and be able to give you more advice.
Ava
TE,
do any of his friends use? would they be able to look for him? i wouldn't recomend you going into the dark world of a heroin addict. its not a pleasant or safe place for you. these places are horrible. i doubt you would even be able to reconize your son if you did go in. its dark, dirty and heroin addicts there are secretive. he may be hidden, and he may be there for a reason. maybe he doesn't want found. i know it may sound bad, but maybe he has lost all hope. i would suggest having a friend of his that knows the area look for him it may be your best bet. i'm sorry you are going through this, it must be so hard. im not going to try to fool you, i'm a heroin addict and i don't know what you are going through. i only can pray that your son is safe and that one day he will find his way. good luck to you.
many prayers and if you need to post we are here
good luck
raerae
have you asked the police to help look for him?
do any of his friends use? would they be able to look for him? i wouldn't recomend you going into the dark world of a heroin addict. its not a pleasant or safe place for you. these places are horrible. i doubt you would even be able to reconize your son if you did go in. its dark, dirty and heroin addicts there are secretive. he may be hidden, and he may be there for a reason. maybe he doesn't want found. i know it may sound bad, but maybe he has lost all hope. i would suggest having a friend of his that knows the area look for him it may be your best bet. i'm sorry you are going through this, it must be so hard. im not going to try to fool you, i'm a heroin addict and i don't know what you are going through. i only can pray that your son is safe and that one day he will find his way. good luck to you.
many prayers and if you need to post we are here
good luck
raerae
have you asked the police to help look for him?
Ava and Raerae,
thankyou for the advice and care you sent my way. Two of his friends are going to drive around the area tonight and see if thay can find him or his vehicle. Dont know what to do if they find him. I suppose it will depend on him. Things are kind of in limbo, just waiting to hear SOMETHING. Raerae, maybe you dont know how I feel but I dont know how you feel either. Anyway you look at it, its a painful process for ALL of us. Guess we are all in it together one way or another. Thank God for these message boards!!!
TE
thankyou for the advice and care you sent my way. Two of his friends are going to drive around the area tonight and see if thay can find him or his vehicle. Dont know what to do if they find him. I suppose it will depend on him. Things are kind of in limbo, just waiting to hear SOMETHING. Raerae, maybe you dont know how I feel but I dont know how you feel either. Anyway you look at it, its a painful process for ALL of us. Guess we are all in it together one way or another. Thank God for these message boards!!!
TE
TE,
good luck and i hope you get some news that will help you sleep.
let us know tomorrow
raerae
good luck and i hope you get some news that will help you sleep.
let us know tomorrow
raerae
I pray that you find your loved one TE. I am in a similar situation as you involving a dear friend who has disappeared for the last 6 days and it is destroying everything I have worked so hard to accomplish in the last 2 months. I am an addict who's been on subutex for the last two months, was doing OK except for a few slip ups here and there but now I fear if my friend does not surface soon it will be just a matter of time before I can't take the worry anymore and I'll make that drive downtown, firstly and foremostly to look for her, but just as likely to score. Before this happened I was pretty stable, though having a hard time, but still sleeping at night and able to cope with my not so stressful life but with every hour that passes I don't hear from her I just gets harder and harder and harder. She is an addict, who I've not really seen so much since I started my recovery for obvious reasons but we would still talk on the phone but suddenly people started calling me wondering if i knew her whereabouts. I haven't been able to sleep for three days...i just lay in bed thinking dreadful thoughts, hoping and praying that she is OK but simply not knowing is killing me. I called her sister yesterday hoping to get some answers but i was even more horrified to hear that her family hasn't heard from her in almost a week. Quite frankly I can't take this anymore!!!! I need her to be found !! I can't deal with these emotions right now !!! I don't want them! And it all goes back to what I do want....a moment of peace. I took a bigger dose of sub today but already I feel it's not going to cut it. By some miracle I made it to work today and hope I can stay until the day is done but I just don't know what to do. This is consuming me worse then h ever did and I can't shake it. I just want her to be found. I am in a horrible place right now...! What to do?!?!?!?!
-morph
-morph
Morpheous, you gotta give it up friend. Your recovery is, must be, the most important thing in your life. And in reality, what could you do? When your friend wants to sort her life out, she will, and you will be there for her, clean and in a position to help. If you are thinking that you "may" score if you go downtown, you have probably already made the decision to score in your subconscious. The subconscious has a funny knack of plotting "excuses" to score. And this is a great excuse to score. Who would blame you? But you have to be one step ahead of the game. Know from bitter experience that it never is just once. Once in a blue moon soon turns into once every few weeks, to once a week, and then Hey Presto, you're back on the gear. Don't fall into this trap. You have to realise that you can't save her. Nobody can, except her self. Do the best thing you can, and put yourself first.
Sending you good vibes
Diff
x
Sending you good vibes
Diff
x
thanks Diff,
you're right. you're very right. There's no doubt in my mind if i were to drive downtown whethor to look for my friend, or buy a slice of pizza I would very likely end up scoring. I know all the mind tricks and yes I have fallen for them many times, thats part of being an addict. I'm even at the point where if i did go, and I did score what would that change? Nothing. my friend would still be gone and by the time i come down the pain will be 1000 times worse. I understand exactly what you're saying bud and I thank you for pointing me in the right direction. I may just make it thru the day. I just need to learn to deal with my emotions better...and it's working. I do feel better than i did 15 minutes ago when i wrote the post. It's like i get myself in these situations in my head where i feel claustrophobic or something wierd like that. anyway...I'm still sitting here at work, not going anywhere...so far, so good. and yes, I need to stop worrying about other people and worry about ME! then again thats all us addicts do most of the time ain't it? thats a whole other discussion I know.
allst i can do is pray...and it's all I will do.
-morph
you're right. you're very right. There's no doubt in my mind if i were to drive downtown whethor to look for my friend, or buy a slice of pizza I would very likely end up scoring. I know all the mind tricks and yes I have fallen for them many times, thats part of being an addict. I'm even at the point where if i did go, and I did score what would that change? Nothing. my friend would still be gone and by the time i come down the pain will be 1000 times worse. I understand exactly what you're saying bud and I thank you for pointing me in the right direction. I may just make it thru the day. I just need to learn to deal with my emotions better...and it's working. I do feel better than i did 15 minutes ago when i wrote the post. It's like i get myself in these situations in my head where i feel claustrophobic or something wierd like that. anyway...I'm still sitting here at work, not going anywhere...so far, so good. and yes, I need to stop worrying about other people and worry about ME! then again thats all us addicts do most of the time ain't it? thats a whole other discussion I know.
allst i can do is pray...and it's all I will do.
-morph
Hey Morpheous
What Dif said is sooo true. You're doing so well... so just get over this hump. And if you can get over this the next hump will be easier... and the next. You can't save anyone unless they want saving and first and foremost look after yourself. Slip ups in the context of trying are one thing, slip ups in the context of giving up is detrimental. You don't want that and I'm sure your friend wouldn't want that either.
Keep on keeping on darlin'
What Dif said is sooo true. You're doing so well... so just get over this hump. And if you can get over this the next hump will be easier... and the next. You can't save anyone unless they want saving and first and foremost look after yourself. Slip ups in the context of trying are one thing, slip ups in the context of giving up is detrimental. You don't want that and I'm sure your friend wouldn't want that either.
Keep on keeping on darlin'
morph,
hang in there budy. your doing so good right now. let me know if you need to talk.
raerae
hang in there budy. your doing so good right now. let me know if you need to talk.
raerae
Ahhhhhhh,
I feel as though a 10,000 ton weight has been lifted. She just called me...told me she was OK. Turns out she had a falling out with her boyfriend and just had to disappear. I wish she could have f***in told SOMEONE where she was. Anyway, I yelled at her and then apologized for yelling but she is fine and dandy. I started to feel better earlier when I started getting phone calls from a blocked number and every time i would pick up they would hang up. I knew it was her, probably feeling ashamed or something :P. Man oh man i feel so much better!!!! Thats the thing with this recovery...pain and emotions are just amplified a zillion times. I probably wouldn't have given a fraction of the thought i gave it had i not been where I am now. Either way, thank you everyone for your support. I think had I not come here I'd have probably cracked early this morning. I am so so grateful and am here for anyone who might need the same help I did. We can't go at this alone...I know I sure can't. One thing I learned though...no matter how bad, bleak or desparate something is...it's usually never as bad as it seems. being where i am today compared to two months ago....I know that for a fact. thanks again.
-morph
I feel as though a 10,000 ton weight has been lifted. She just called me...told me she was OK. Turns out she had a falling out with her boyfriend and just had to disappear. I wish she could have f***in told SOMEONE where she was. Anyway, I yelled at her and then apologized for yelling but she is fine and dandy. I started to feel better earlier when I started getting phone calls from a blocked number and every time i would pick up they would hang up. I knew it was her, probably feeling ashamed or something :P. Man oh man i feel so much better!!!! Thats the thing with this recovery...pain and emotions are just amplified a zillion times. I probably wouldn't have given a fraction of the thought i gave it had i not been where I am now. Either way, thank you everyone for your support. I think had I not come here I'd have probably cracked early this morning. I am so so grateful and am here for anyone who might need the same help I did. We can't go at this alone...I know I sure can't. One thing I learned though...no matter how bad, bleak or desparate something is...it's usually never as bad as it seems. being where i am today compared to two months ago....I know that for a fact. thanks again.
-morph