Hey Spaghetti;
Thanks for the nice words on the recovery diary board but with all due respect to you; that book has already been written... go read Junky by William Borroughs if u can get a copy if youre looking for ways to expand.... Im only here to spew the contents of my head...its my therapy... As for Substance abuse books in general; I believe they tend to trigger anyone reading them...because in my experience Junkies and addicts dont read them for the same reason others do...
And listen to Mom&More when she tells you to go pick a boardNO body comes herenot to have a conversation..I understand the awkwardness of beginning here, starting somewherea little fear youre going to say something really stupid and oh, what will they think about meright, been there, its uncomfortable at first to have to tell the truth about yourselfbut do it once, and then youll find you get better at itand truthfully, none of us give a Sh**were all in the same boat and weve all said the same thingsand no body is a better addict or a better Junkie than anyone elseI hate that gameya know what ?...Im so bad at handling a needle I couldnt stab myself in the dark if my life depended on itmake u feel better ?...bet there are about a bunch more of us that dont live up to the theater of the addict/junkie flag too.... and what your doing is ISOLATINGwhich is a real good addict gamewe do it so wellso pick a boardyoure not fooling anyone ...why are you here ?...what are you looking for ? Im not sure how old you are but you sound young...and maybe just a bit lost and not sure where to be Spaghettiwhat are you looking for ?...
And as for getting my head together.... thats a lifelong process babe with everyone...you think other people have their heads together but the truth of it is, no one does...everyones still learning, growing, becoming and ending...Ive functioned for over 40 years as an addict, getting your head together is another measurement thing, by whose standards is my head together ?...Is it when " I write a book about substance abuse ?"....I come here to spew, to get the overload of my head out....please dont get me wrong...if someone relates by reading the incessant chatter of my head and it helps, great...but I dont come here and spew and moan and chatter for others...I do it for myself...because in the end the only one that can save me is me...and we all got a different way of doing that sometimes...I dont think many people read this kind of stuff without needing or looking for something...so Spaghetti...what is it your looking for here ?
Peace
Con
Oh my God!
Harsh words & a lengthy script Con.
I apologise if I sent you over the edge, believe me, it was not intentional.
I appreciate that sometimes I disagree with the majority of this site, which is fine by me, but it is also fine that each of us have their own opinion. And as much as I like to read what is written here - I do find some of the posts self-indulgent beyond belief.
I havent quite figured out my addict status yet.
I'm guessing after 40 yrs you have. My comment was meant as a compliment. Take it or leave it, fine by me.
And, as for what am I looking for? I'm pretty sure I wont find it on here. x
Harsh words & a lengthy script Con.
I apologise if I sent you over the edge, believe me, it was not intentional.
I appreciate that sometimes I disagree with the majority of this site, which is fine by me, but it is also fine that each of us have their own opinion. And as much as I like to read what is written here - I do find some of the posts self-indulgent beyond belief.
I havent quite figured out my addict status yet.
I'm guessing after 40 yrs you have. My comment was meant as a compliment. Take it or leave it, fine by me.
And, as for what am I looking for? I'm pretty sure I wont find it on here. x
| QUOTE |
| I do find some of the posts self-indulgent beyond belief. |
But that's why we're here...for ourselves...to help ourselves and in the process maybe help another. Some posts maybe are self-indulgent because people come here when they have no one to indulge them at home, they need to be heard. But equally self-indulgent is the posting and deleting you indulged in when you first arrived here...lots of blank spaces with just your name or a 'never mind'. Not everyone does find what they want/need here, but enough do. Disagreement is normal with so many different types, cultures, experiences.
What brought you here the first time? Is it still a concern/issue? No one ends up here by mistake...whatever search you entered brought you here. You've written about loneliness and alcohol and addiction...so what's up in your world?
Peace ~ MomNMore
M&M...Thanks...Spaghetti...no harshness intended, truly...im not exactly myself these days...I just dont have a lot of patience with people right now...its nothing personal...self indulgent...absolutly...its not stuff I would dump on anyone else anywhere...I write because it figures crap out for me....its not intended to be answered...when I want to talk I go to the boards...I put my game face on for the world just like anyone else everyday...nobody needs to know Im fighting these kinds of demons...i only got this place to do it...so please, Im sorry you are angry.. forgive me...and if there is an issue...like M&M said...nobody comes here by mistake...not normally...and these are really good people...so dont go away pissed off and making judgements on everyone here just because Con isnt in a good place right now...Im not a good explainer...ask anyone here...they usually have to re-type everything I try to say...so, please, if you need us...were here...
Con
Con
i dont think it is necessary to be forgiven, anger belongs to someone else..that is something i am learning. i find that in the past when i was frustrated and angry (with myself) and people said things i didnt like i would fuss and fume and threaten to leave here, for me it was just my cycle of take a step back, look at myself and evaluate #1 why was i so reactive and #2 were other people giving me valuable information that i just didnt want to hear? ya, usually and I come back because i can ramble, and rail and say things i would never ever say face to face with anyone..it feels safe here and mostly objective and almost always thought provoking, it is not an accident that we are here..so that is why i stay and post and read..and Con, you would be surprised at how thought and feeling comes through even when we dont think we are making sense.....
Con - hi there, spaghetti here.
I agree you are 100% entitled to speak your mind here - it's what it is for! Whether or not I agree is another matter (I've only read a little and have no opinion, honest) - all I said was that I thought you wrote well.
I do not mean you any harm, but wish you warm regards, xx
I agree you are 100% entitled to speak your mind here - it's what it is for! Whether or not I agree is another matter (I've only read a little and have no opinion, honest) - all I said was that I thought you wrote well.
I do not mean you any harm, but wish you warm regards, xx
