Well the last week i went beserk, he was using dope again, had the car at a new "friends" and i turned up 2 little kids were there and i asked for his phone as he hadnt been answering it threw it yelled a bit and took the car keys.
Since then only about 4 days he has been straight and things are back to quite good. It is so good having this site I can read posts and just cry because your situations are so close to mine
What hurts me the most is that he has no idea how it hurts me and i know that the likelyhood is soon he will use again, i pray that each time will be his last and i really love him when hes straight but i cant be his partner/wife and counsellor. I have been telling him lately to stop blaming other people that he sreates these situations
Truth is i have some time off work and secretly im hoping to get him a little clean before i return to work and get him in to some sort of therapy or healthy regime. I am exhausted and cryed yesterday for no reason, i really need a break.
I so deperatly want to believe him when he says he wants to stop but he lies to my face. Im sick of scouring the house to find where hes hidden his current stash and i get mad at the waste of money when i dont have enough for things like a haircut
I get so sad doing things on my own, i hate it really, but he wont come with me to things, not even to walk the dog, hes always sleeping, i think he needs a full health check
im trying really hard to value myself and do things for me in case it turns out bad but i know iv let him away with too much already and nothing changes if nothing changes, he just wans to stop using not get any therapy, i think hes embarrased to be seen in those places, truth is so am I
iv been saving my favourite bits from this web site in to a folder and i hope he reads it, it makes me cry when i read it.
thanks so much for your help everyone
emile
I found myself in a similar situation several years ago.
First, I denied the fact that my partner was an addict. My second course of action was to do alot of things on my own. I did not want to see my partner in the state he was in.
It has taken many years of numerous attempts for my husband to be clean. He has been in two in-patient treatments. Neither treatment center led him on the road to recovery. While he was away (summer of 2004) I found the strength to go to a counselor and read the Purpose Driven Life. I also attended Alanon meetings. I find that I took the focus off of my spouse and put the focus on myself - things are 1000 times better. It was very hard to do and emotionally draining - but I am glad that I did it for me.
I want to encourage you to find strength to look out for yourself. You are a very important person and you need to take care of yourself emotionally.
My husband is currently seeing a doctor (psychiatrist) and is taking suboxene. I thank God that a company invented suboxene. Suboxene is a blocker - it is not an opiate.
I pray that my husband stays on the right page and I wish you well.
Peace be with you.
First, I denied the fact that my partner was an addict. My second course of action was to do alot of things on my own. I did not want to see my partner in the state he was in.
It has taken many years of numerous attempts for my husband to be clean. He has been in two in-patient treatments. Neither treatment center led him on the road to recovery. While he was away (summer of 2004) I found the strength to go to a counselor and read the Purpose Driven Life. I also attended Alanon meetings. I find that I took the focus off of my spouse and put the focus on myself - things are 1000 times better. It was very hard to do and emotionally draining - but I am glad that I did it for me.
I want to encourage you to find strength to look out for yourself. You are a very important person and you need to take care of yourself emotionally.
My husband is currently seeing a doctor (psychiatrist) and is taking suboxene. I thank God that a company invented suboxene. Suboxene is a blocker - it is not an opiate.
I pray that my husband stays on the right page and I wish you well.
Peace be with you.
therese, thanks for your message of hope.
and for sharing an approach to a loved one's addiction that works.
so much better than the obsessing, etc., and all that goes with it.
please stay with us and share a while.
others that come here for help need to hear what you have to say.
P.S. -- and also with you.
