Hey all, I know it has been a little while since i have posted. I just got a new job and working alot!
But the other day i got into a fight w/ my 10 year old brother and i know he's only 10 and i shouldnt take what he says seriously but he was yelling and saying things like your 21 years old and you still live w/ your parents and i'm a loser and stuff.
I got so pissed i was just screaming you dont know anything about me and dont say that about me and i stormed out of the house.
I was so upset about it i know it sounds stupid but i wanted to use and the lies were pouring into my head like he's right and i'll never really change it's only a matter of time things of that sort.
Completly untrue! but i thought about going into the city and using i had the money so that made it harder. I really didnt think it a option i wasnt going to do it but it's been so long since i had a real craving that strong.
Tomarrow will officially be 8 months since i last used!!! That is so hudge for me.
I'm glad i didnt use and it reminded me that i still have to be cautious it only takes once for me and i could be right back were i was.
M,
CONGRATULATIONS ....for today and tomorrow! That is the beauty in the power of choice...no matter how hard it can be at times. You clearly saw that using had nothing to do with the situation and took the road less traveled. Best of luck to you!
Darin
CONGRATULATIONS ....for today and tomorrow! That is the beauty in the power of choice...no matter how hard it can be at times. You clearly saw that using had nothing to do with the situation and took the road less traveled. Best of luck to you!
Darin
yeah, well done you! i totally agree that it shows how easy it is to slip and how you should always be aware - however, don't beat yourself up. you did the right thing by not giving in - can you imagine how you'd feel now if you had!? when you're feeling bad or whatever, or had an argument, the moment passes, the next hour/day etc.. brings something new. that's the biggest thing to re-learn, is how to deal with crap life throws at you, to ride it out and come out the other side stronger. you should be really proud of yourself, 8 months is amazing, well done! i don't know if it is possible, or your family knows, but could it help to tell your bro that saying stuff like that doesn't help, and you still need support? it might be right thing, or totally not an option. whatever, you did it on your own, so you're strong enough, so keep going, and soon it will be another 8 months etc..!!
Yeah my parents know all about it and they are so proud of me and my other brothers know and my 19 year old brother was messed up in it too he's been clean for a moth or 2.
But my youngest brother is only 10 and he is not really ready to understand it.He thinks i was just sick all the times i was in rehab and stuff and he knows about me going to jail but he really dosnt understand it all. It's not his fault we were fighting he said things he probablly dosnt mean ya know?
It's ok. Good luck to you on your recovery it's just still hard somtimes. Thanks alot Mia
But my youngest brother is only 10 and he is not really ready to understand it.He thinks i was just sick all the times i was in rehab and stuff and he knows about me going to jail but he really dosnt understand it all. It's not his fault we were fighting he said things he probablly dosnt mean ya know?
It's ok. Good luck to you on your recovery it's just still hard somtimes. Thanks alot Mia
