Crzymm27@aol.com
Hi all
I have been reading some of the posting and they inspire so much. I have been on hydros for almost 4.5 years and have tried to stop numerous times. I even went to rehab for it once, but failed after I celebrated 30 days clean. I feel so lost! my husband has been great but is fed up with this and is threating to leave me and take my three beautiful children with him.. i want to stop but i don't even know where to begin. i tried a couple of weeks ago right after my father committed suicide, but by the second day i was so sick and my husband was out of town working so i used just so i could have the energy to take care of my kids. it really makes me sad when i think that the only way to be a mother is to take pills. I feel like supermom when i take my pills cause i can do everything. I want my life back. I wanna be able to take my kids to the park without having to pop a few pills. Well i hope to hear from you guys, i need the inspiration and need to talk to people who have made it or is going through it so i can know that yes i can make it.
Thanks for listening
Jackie(Crzymm27)
Sounds like you and i are in the same boat-----------I do know that there were many years that I was clean and sober and I did the mom thing with ease---so the idea that i need to take something to function is just my disease trying to kick my butt---------different things work for different people--some can taper--some go cold turkey --some use methadone or suboxone----some use the 12 steps and a higher power-----i believe there is no wrong way to get clean--------i am aware that as an addict i do not like discomfort--for me i will have to suck it up for 4 days and go thru the physical part-----it is the mental obsession that gets me---also my dad just dieid on tuesday and the grief is also messing with my mind-----I know i have to get clean for me but if I dedicate my recovery to the memory of my dad I may be more motivated-----good luck on your journey
Hi there you two sound like you have such determination right now dont waste it. Ive said this before but think its correct whilst i was taking pills i used every excuse i could to try and justify my addiction, but found over the years (20) there was only one or two times a month where i felt i could achieve it these times were only very short like a day but what i actually did was capitlise on one of those days and never looked back. I dont think it matters how or what way you come off drugs its the staying off thats so important, the easy bit is to give up the hardest part is staying off and not allowing future bad times to convince you you cant manage without your crutch. A change in behavour is vitil to anyones recovery some choose to go to groups, some ct either way you need help adjusting to your new way of thinking, coming to a board like this is such a usefull tool but not the answer the answer lies within all of us to change no matter what we are going through it just for some takes time to see that. Either way good look with any progress you both make il be thinking of you. jackie you sound like you have the support from your husband thats vitil too you dont need additional problems take care jackie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
WacjyJacky,
Thank you for you kind words--you always show so much compassion----
Thank you for you kind words--you always show so much compassion----
Hey Jackie,
Boy do we have alot in common. You said it, taking the pills made me feel like supermom too and at work I was able to jsut do so much more. I've used percs since 1999, and for the first year I actually threw scripts in the garbage and only took when absolutely needed. Don't let your hubby's threats dampen your trying to recover. One minute at a time hun. It's all we can do. And this whole group is right here each and evrey time you need us, cause we need you too.
You know that you have a problem and are admitting it, that in my mind has got to be the biggest and hardest part of our start to recovery. I'm proud of you. Reach out to me if you need to, don't know how big of a help I might be but I guarantee I'll try my best.
Thinking of you sending my bestest wishes
boo
Boy do we have alot in common. You said it, taking the pills made me feel like supermom too and at work I was able to jsut do so much more. I've used percs since 1999, and for the first year I actually threw scripts in the garbage and only took when absolutely needed. Don't let your hubby's threats dampen your trying to recover. One minute at a time hun. It's all we can do. And this whole group is right here each and evrey time you need us, cause we need you too.
You know that you have a problem and are admitting it, that in my mind has got to be the biggest and hardest part of our start to recovery. I'm proud of you. Reach out to me if you need to, don't know how big of a help I might be but I guarantee I'll try my best.
Thinking of you sending my bestest wishes
boo
