We Agnostics

Pain Pills
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The following is an excerpt from the Big Book of AA. I know that this is discussion board on pills, but if you will simply substituted "pills" and "addiction" for "drinking" and "alcoholism" I think the message will be clear enough. I suppose this is my answer to those who feel we do not have enough focus on recovery here. This text speaks to the issue of finding a faith in a higher power. This is a huge stumbling block for many so I though I would print a bit from the original text that gave birth to the 12 Step concept. The language is a little out of date--it was written in the late 1930s and 1040s when AA hads about 100 members, but many hundreds of thousands have found a solution between the covers of the Big Book. Here it is, from Chapter 4.

If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic. If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer.

To one who feels he is an atheist or agnostic such an experience seems impossible, but to continue as he is means disaster, especially if he is an alcoholic of the hopeless variety. To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face.

But it isn't so difficult. About half our original fellowship were of exactly that type. At first some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics. But after a while we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life or else. Perhaps it is going to be that way with you. But cheer up, something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics. Our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted.

If a mere code of morals or a better philosophy of life were sufficient to overcome alcoholism, many of us would have recovered long ago. But we found that such codes and philosophies did not save us, no matter how much we tried. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasn't there. Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly.

Lack of power, that was our dilemma. we had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power?

Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem. That means we have written a book which we believe to be spiritual as well as moral. And it means, of course, that we are going to talk about God. Here difficulty arises with agnostics. Many times we talk to a new man and watch his hope rise as we discuss his alcoholic problems and explain our fellowship. But his face falls when we speak of spiritual matters, especially when we mention God, for we have re-opened a subject which our man thought he had neatly evaded or entirely ignored.

We know how he feels. We have shared his honest doubt and prejudice. Some of us have been violently anti-religious. To others, the word "God" brought up a particular idea of Him with which someone had tried to impress them during childhood. Perhaps we rejected this particular conception because it seemed inadequate. With that rejection we imagined we had abandoned the God idea entirely. We were bothered with the thought that faith and dependence upon a Power beyond ourselves was somewhat weak, even cowardly. We looked upon this world of warring individuals, warring theological systems, and inexplicable calamity, with deep skepticism. We looked askance at many individuals who claimed to be godly. How could a Supreme Being have anything to do with it all? And who could comprehend a Supreme Being anyhow? Yet, in other moments, we found ourselves thinking, when enchanted by a starlit night, "Who, then, make all this?" There was a feeling of awe and wonder, but it was fleeting and soon lost.

Yes, we of agnostic temperament have had these thoughts and experiences. Let us make haste to reassure you. We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God.
Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another's conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and to effect a contact with Him. As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps. We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him. To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. It is open, we believe, to all men.

When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies, too, to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book. Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him. Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach. That was growth, but if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere. So we used our own conception, however limited it was.

We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. --"Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built.
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((((August)))),
Great post, hope your feeling well. Take care. Best Wishes

P.S. Still addicted to this board, lololol...... but getting out alot in between and trying to find a balance lololololo
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(((((((((((((((((august)))))))))))))))))))))

how are you?

my na book has about a foot of dust on it....but because of you.....i dig it out

cant hurt, now that i am no longer spending all my time figuring out a way to score.....get money, find connections, mend old ones with those with whom i would rather not know...etc etc i can use this time to read....and i do
the big book might be a good time killer

you know i love you!!!
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You are a sweetheart, Spongemom.

I am doing pretty well these days. The pain appears to have leveled off and I feel that my pain med use is reasonable under the circumstances. I do feel a need to stay close to my program these days, simply because I think it is easy to slip into denial with these pain meds.

Cancer patients don't get out much, and it is easy to feel forgotten sometimes. Contributing to this board helps me feel like I serve a higher purpose, and of course developing relationships with the regulars and caring about their journey certainly takes me out of my own petty worries.

I hope you are doing allright today. Yes! Get out that Big Book! They used to tell me that if I got jumpy and wanted to use, it was time to do a Step.

All the best,

August
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August,
i just wanted to share with you that everyday since i have been here you have shared something i have needed to hear.
take care darlin!
love,
ladybug