last night, i was hurrying to make dinner, because a friend of mine from church was having a get together. I was struggling not to have a drink, because these friends don't drink, annd i don't like to be around them with booze on my breath. My 2 year old was crying and hangng onto my leg while I strirred the stir fry. My 9 year old was giving me a hard time about doing her homework. My 14 year old asked me to sign a quiz she had gotten a D on. My blood pressure was going higher and higher and higher. I finally blew up and shouted something to the effect of " it's crazy around this house. Who can function like this?" Just then my saintly husband, who had up to this point not offered me any help comes into the room, gives me a disapproving look, and says "your behavior is scary" With that he takes the baby off my leg, and floats out of the room. I think he bumped his halo on the door frame on the way out, because he'd already had a few beers.
to quickly finish, that was it for me. I poured a glass of wine, cancelled my evening with my friends and stayed home feeling very hurt and bitter .
What else could I have done? When my husband came in and got critical, that was my breaking point. I know all of you have had this type of experience and were able to pass on the drink. How do I do it? We have a lot of evenings that are like this.
I try to pause when agitated and if need be go into a private room and pray, pray, pray for God to remove the obsession and craving to drink (I haven't had that obsession and craving in a long time). However, in early recovery I did. I've got a 15 year old who to say it nicely is quite a challenge, she's most likely "one of us" and has already been arrested and charged with a misdeamor. I realize now, with great relief, that I am powerless over people, places and things and the only thing I can change is myself and how I react to situations. Today there is no more chaos and drama in my life and no more screaming and yelling either. I go to meetings where I share what's going on with me and then I get the support from others who have gone before me with similar situations in their life and they share what they did to get thru it w/o a drink or a drug. Good luck to you and your family.
Thanks VW,
I have been feeling so overwhelmed lately. Last night wasn't a good night and today was pretty bad, too. I feel like I'm juggling too many balls, and constantly dropping one. Everywhere I turn, someone is critisizing me rather than offering to help. I feel like I'm failing everything and everyone.
I read your life story that you posted a few days back. I'm glad that everything got better for you. that must feel so good. One day I'll get there. I know I need to make some changes, but with 5 kids it's not easy to do. The youngest is not even two yet. I think i'm going to be trapped for a few more years at least.
sorry about all the whining. I'm usually pretty optomistic. Just having a bad day.
I have been feeling so overwhelmed lately. Last night wasn't a good night and today was pretty bad, too. I feel like I'm juggling too many balls, and constantly dropping one. Everywhere I turn, someone is critisizing me rather than offering to help. I feel like I'm failing everything and everyone.
I read your life story that you posted a few days back. I'm glad that everything got better for you. that must feel so good. One day I'll get there. I know I need to make some changes, but with 5 kids it's not easy to do. The youngest is not even two yet. I think i'm going to be trapped for a few more years at least.
sorry about all the whining. I'm usually pretty optomistic. Just having a bad day.
Get rid of the booze in the house. Saintly husband needs to help with this. He needs to get on board. No one drinks. Things are too hectic.
Use the crock pot more and order out when you can.
Planning ahead helps to avoid the situations you described.
Invite those non drinking friends over, more.
Use the crock pot more and order out when you can.
Planning ahead helps to avoid the situations you described.
Invite those non drinking friends over, more.
Do yourself and favor and put down the drink while your kids are young, at least that is my suggestion...you will feel so much better if you do...my kids, my family and my friends all have a new found respect for me, since I got sober and showed by the action I took that I was changing. I also have a new found respect for my own self...the self loathing and sense of failing myself and everyone else is gone. Do some of your children go to school? There are meetings where I live that are child friendly...just a suggestion.
I think your question is back to front. What else doesn't work besides a drink?
Hey Mas that was a bloody good sugestion of putting the croc pot on, then go and tell hubby see ya I'm off to a meeting where you can have time out and start working on yourself.
Light and love Zac
Light and love Zac
Yes Mas, please put down the drink while your kids are still young, you will not regret it!
