Please don't just read and read more, let me know what you think? Be honest......
Lou..how ya doin?a bit frazzled to say the least,dont think i have been ignoring..yer posts,just been busy with my 7yr.old hyper daughter.Small world..because i knew Stevie L...who got shot last week..he was on the same clinic as myself..not a bad guy really but just another statistic.My honest opinion..cant say much that ya dont know yerself..ease off on the benzos if you can&to put yer mind at rest there isnt much point trying to score methd.from any of the clinics..coz most people get there daily dose inside&anyone with a weekly script has to go to the chemist..so if you dont know anyone theres not much point doin your head in over it.Also as ya know this forum is a great place&i know yer emotions must be all over the place,...so dont give up on yerself..coz we certainly wont give up on you.Look yer doin good you are determined to get off this s***..even if it seems a world away&so very hard physically&mentally but its within yer grasp.Its tough that Kev.aint giving you the support you need..but thats the drug for you..selfish&all consuming .Your off to Spain soon&hopefully you will feel a bit better..but i think getting out of Dublin is a good move.Gotta go ..its 7yr.old time urgghh!!!..try and stay positive.,just think the physical side will be over soon.just focus on the next day or two.Take care....Davey
You..up?Lou..how are ya feeling..ive had one of my nights of insomnia..not as bad as yer own of course..is this day three for you?stick with it yer doin great...post if yer still about&we can have a chat.........take care.Davey
Hey there you!
Yeah I'm up alright! Haven't slept in two nights now. Still feeling low, tired but hey as you said before, it took long enough for me to get addicted so it's not going to pass in a day or two. I just hope I'll be able for this flight this time tomorrow.
Do you still suffer from insomnia six months later. I was never really a good sleeper and it's just something that wrecks my head completely. Never mind if there was something decent on the TV to keep your mind off it but there never is, is there. I think I'm gonna have to start a DVD Collection in Spain for the sleepless nights.
You working today - how do you manage a days work when you haven't slept. Having said that it's a different kind of lethargy isn't it..
Sounded like you had a great Xmas with Sian and her little russian hamster. She must bring you so much joy - something to keep going for. I just love her name.
Keep well Davey - and keep in touch. I do value what you have to say.
Love always.
Yeah I'm up alright! Haven't slept in two nights now. Still feeling low, tired but hey as you said before, it took long enough for me to get addicted so it's not going to pass in a day or two. I just hope I'll be able for this flight this time tomorrow.
Do you still suffer from insomnia six months later. I was never really a good sleeper and it's just something that wrecks my head completely. Never mind if there was something decent on the TV to keep your mind off it but there never is, is there. I think I'm gonna have to start a DVD Collection in Spain for the sleepless nights.
You working today - how do you manage a days work when you haven't slept. Having said that it's a different kind of lethargy isn't it..
Sounded like you had a great Xmas with Sian and her little russian hamster. She must bring you so much joy - something to keep going for. I just love her name.
Keep well Davey - and keep in touch. I do value what you have to say.
Love always.
Well..Lou..no work today...i also have always been a bad sleeper.....also i work alternate shifts so my body clock is all over the place.Dunno if ya read the reply on the other post but i knew Stevie.L...who got shot last week..he was on the same clinic as me&we had a few dealings in the past....i dont really beleive in fate but its weird him sorting you out with the juice&baam mistaken identity..i think.Anyway i will hear all the tittle tattle in the clinic on Weds.from Irelands finest.L.O.L...Take care your nearly over the worst..by Mon.you should feel a bit more together for the flight.Take care..Davey
That's what's so sad that it was mistaken identity, It was meant to be one of the others, you probably know who I mean. Do keep this between ourselves Davey - that probably goes without saying I know, but just in case.
Kev works shifts too which plays havoc with his body clock and like me was never a good sleeper anyway.
I read all your posts and man do you make sense all of the time. Half the time I don't know what to respond to people so I don't know why I expected people to respond to me when I posted IMMEDIATELY. That's the selfish side of me coming out, as if I'm the only person on here who's hurting.
You should see the amount of vitamins, zinc, magnesium etc that I have bagged up and ready to bring away with me. Customs will have great fun going through them all only to find system balancing stuff.
Enjoy your day off - hope Sian doesn't wear you out too much. You're so lucky to have her. That's one thing that makes me sad, that I didn't have kids. I suppose you can never say never, it might happen one day!!
Keep good.
Kev works shifts too which plays havoc with his body clock and like me was never a good sleeper anyway.
I read all your posts and man do you make sense all of the time. Half the time I don't know what to respond to people so I don't know why I expected people to respond to me when I posted IMMEDIATELY. That's the selfish side of me coming out, as if I'm the only person on here who's hurting.
You should see the amount of vitamins, zinc, magnesium etc that I have bagged up and ready to bring away with me. Customs will have great fun going through them all only to find system balancing stuff.
Enjoy your day off - hope Sian doesn't wear you out too much. You're so lucky to have her. That's one thing that makes me sad, that I didn't have kids. I suppose you can never say never, it might happen one day!!
Keep good.
Yer right Lou..about Stevie..just more Dublin disasters..but i will end that thread now.Sian is great most of the time&having to mind her has kept me focussed on staying clean obviously for my sake but hers also.When she was a toddler i was still an active addict..so was her mum..but she never went without,her mum has been more or less out of the picture for the last 5yrs.she might see her once a mnth.I nightmare back then of her visiting me in prison&having done a bit of time in England in the early 90s..i would see the families come in on visiting day..but after the visits were over the guys would be really down,so that stuck vividly in my head.I think only for the fact that i have to be there for her..in every way..my effort to get clean wouldve been so much harder.Im ramblin now.You take care&just focus on the next day or two ...then out of dreary Dublin to sunny Spain,i dont envy how you feel now but i sure envy you heading too Spain,by the way im 37 also funny how these dots connect in a small way.Tlk soon..Davey
By the way..you&Kev wernt really argueing about who wrote Golden Brown were you?The Stranglers if you were,great song&i think at least two of the band were H addicts.Take care Davey
I knew it, I said it was the Stranglers and of course was told, ''oh no it's not'' !
I'm sitting here with my microwave bedddy buddy, you know the ones, little teddy's that you put in the micro and place on the part of you that's hurting. Only problem is I couldn't get a teddy big enough to cover my whole body. So the teddy is moving and jerking around that bit more than me, ha ha..
Isn't it funny how the sleeplessness is a different kind of sleeplessness to when you're straight. When you're straight and you don't sleep you're knackered the next day. This is different though, although I'm tired I don't feel like I've been up for the last two days.
The part of Spain that we're going to is sooo clean, full of hash but that doesn't interest me really. I think I told you last summer when I first joined that my mum had only recently passed away so when we sold the house rather than lettng all the money go up in smoke I bought a place over there. So keep it in mind if you and Sian would ever like a week away just let me know, allow yourself plenty of time so that you can get really cheap flights and the apartments there for you. It's a really lovely spot Davey, it's in Malaga, about 25 minutes from the airport.
Just a thought, accomodation can be the most expensive part of the holidays. SIan would love it, there are two pools, a really cute kiddies pool and all sorts of stuff to keep an active seven year old busy.
Much love.
I'm sitting here with my microwave bedddy buddy, you know the ones, little teddy's that you put in the micro and place on the part of you that's hurting. Only problem is I couldn't get a teddy big enough to cover my whole body. So the teddy is moving and jerking around that bit more than me, ha ha..
Isn't it funny how the sleeplessness is a different kind of sleeplessness to when you're straight. When you're straight and you don't sleep you're knackered the next day. This is different though, although I'm tired I don't feel like I've been up for the last two days.
The part of Spain that we're going to is sooo clean, full of hash but that doesn't interest me really. I think I told you last summer when I first joined that my mum had only recently passed away so when we sold the house rather than lettng all the money go up in smoke I bought a place over there. So keep it in mind if you and Sian would ever like a week away just let me know, allow yourself plenty of time so that you can get really cheap flights and the apartments there for you. It's a really lovely spot Davey, it's in Malaga, about 25 minutes from the airport.
Just a thought, accomodation can be the most expensive part of the holidays. SIan would love it, there are two pools, a really cute kiddies pool and all sorts of stuff to keep an active seven year old busy.
Much love.
Whoa!!!!!!!!!Nice one funny you say that coz ive got a S.S.I.A coming out in May...you know the govt.saving scheme&Sian and me were planning a couple of weeks away..so much thanks for yer very generous offer.After you come back at the end of Jan....if thats yer plan still we can have that cuppa&chat..you will definitly feel better by then.
Again thanks..take care&talk soon
Again thanks..take care&talk soon
Alright ..Lou..just a post..how are ya feeling now?..been 12hrs.since wespoke last,yer nearly there&today may have dragged you..but as i said before..its within yer grasp..so stay srong coz you are really doin good&hopefully you can ease off the benzos in a couple of days.Take care............Davey
Hey there!
Not doing too bad, beginning to come around a bit. If only my tummy would start coming around to my way of thinking now I'd be happy. Haven't even started my packing but I've all day tomorrow (Sunday) to do that. Kev'll get out and go to work tomorrow afternoon and that'll give me time to do the necessary. I'm not worrying too much about what I bring over as half of it will stay there. I'm really looking forward to going, first time in our new place etc. I meant what I said in previous posts, you and Sian are welcome when holiday time comes up...
I've been trying to be normal and keep myself as busy as poss all day that's why I haven't been on. Saturdays in this house are busy days with visitors, Kev is from a big family (10 of them) and he's the youngest. They all call on Saturdays to spend the inevitable half hour drinking tea and chatting about their week. In a way it's a good thing to have other people around to take your mind of things and talk just ordinary talk.
Dreading tomorrow a bit, I've got so much to do. I want to go up to my mum's grave and leave some flowers and I want to drop in and see my nan, who's 97 years young to say goodbye. She's got slight dementia and worries so much about me, I think she thinks I'm destitute since we sold the house because she can't get it into her head that I'm living with Kev, in fact half the time she doesn't know who Kev is, I have to keep reminding her that I'm ok and only living around the corner from her. Doesn't matter what I tell her though I always bring tears to her eyes, maybe it's intuition on her behalf, I'll never know.
You still up. I managed a couple of hours there from about 9.30pm to just 20 minutes ago (11.50pm), so a little bit more than a couple of hours. Can only do me good. I'll probably end up awake all night again, but so what, S*** I should've got someone to get me a load of magazines to flicker through, oh well we just can't have it all, can we. Ha ha.....
Davey, why would someone say 'benzo's are trash' when you're trying to come off the other. I find they help me, I don't get as twitchy when I have a couple of them in me, and they also make me wanna just hang about. Don't get me wrong I don't want to just hang about for the whole 3 weeks but for the first 5 or 6 days I don't see the harm. It'll give my body time to adjust to the vitamins, amino acids, omega oils etc. So I'll be happily able to go out and enjoy the sunshine. It's 18 over there today, one of our nice summer days, so I'm looking forward to it. I'll take a few pics and email them to you (if you have email) so at least you can have a look and show Sian where you're going on your holidays.
The usual applies, just let me know in advance when you'd like to go and I'll keep that week or two clear for you. Anway, I'm rambling now.
If you're up keep posting, if not enjoy your sleep as you didn't get much last night.
Keep good as always.
Not doing too bad, beginning to come around a bit. If only my tummy would start coming around to my way of thinking now I'd be happy. Haven't even started my packing but I've all day tomorrow (Sunday) to do that. Kev'll get out and go to work tomorrow afternoon and that'll give me time to do the necessary. I'm not worrying too much about what I bring over as half of it will stay there. I'm really looking forward to going, first time in our new place etc. I meant what I said in previous posts, you and Sian are welcome when holiday time comes up...
I've been trying to be normal and keep myself as busy as poss all day that's why I haven't been on. Saturdays in this house are busy days with visitors, Kev is from a big family (10 of them) and he's the youngest. They all call on Saturdays to spend the inevitable half hour drinking tea and chatting about their week. In a way it's a good thing to have other people around to take your mind of things and talk just ordinary talk.
Dreading tomorrow a bit, I've got so much to do. I want to go up to my mum's grave and leave some flowers and I want to drop in and see my nan, who's 97 years young to say goodbye. She's got slight dementia and worries so much about me, I think she thinks I'm destitute since we sold the house because she can't get it into her head that I'm living with Kev, in fact half the time she doesn't know who Kev is, I have to keep reminding her that I'm ok and only living around the corner from her. Doesn't matter what I tell her though I always bring tears to her eyes, maybe it's intuition on her behalf, I'll never know.
You still up. I managed a couple of hours there from about 9.30pm to just 20 minutes ago (11.50pm), so a little bit more than a couple of hours. Can only do me good. I'll probably end up awake all night again, but so what, S*** I should've got someone to get me a load of magazines to flicker through, oh well we just can't have it all, can we. Ha ha.....
Davey, why would someone say 'benzo's are trash' when you're trying to come off the other. I find they help me, I don't get as twitchy when I have a couple of them in me, and they also make me wanna just hang about. Don't get me wrong I don't want to just hang about for the whole 3 weeks but for the first 5 or 6 days I don't see the harm. It'll give my body time to adjust to the vitamins, amino acids, omega oils etc. So I'll be happily able to go out and enjoy the sunshine. It's 18 over there today, one of our nice summer days, so I'm looking forward to it. I'll take a few pics and email them to you (if you have email) so at least you can have a look and show Sian where you're going on your holidays.
The usual applies, just let me know in advance when you'd like to go and I'll keep that week or two clear for you. Anway, I'm rambling now.
If you're up keep posting, if not enjoy your sleep as you didn't get much last night.
Keep good as always.
