Sdr...
tell you what??????
If i can black out my doctors name and the name of the pharmacy...shall i send you a monthly RX receipt???????It will have my name on it....
Would you be willing to apologize to me and this board?
Will you not judge others in the future???????????
Id love to be here when you learn the truth......not just for me, but to prevent this from happening to others. How you have the nerve to folllow me over from the 12 step site and start this here...i have no clue. This is where i am, this is where i would like to stay...are you mad Im not in your program??
Doing it MY way? I just dont get one addict not believeing anothers worst days.
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let me think how i can Put that foot of your in your mouth without losing total anonymity...........
Hugs
Ali
Ali,
Don't sweat it! It's not like your getting extra brownies by lying to any of us. I have no clue why people would be jealous of the fact that you took high enough doses to kill a horse and didn't die, right? It's all crazy that someone would sit up at 3 am and concern themselves with what you used to take. Thank goodness you are no longer in the hell you once were and you seem to be on the right track now. You should be commended and NOT fried at the stake...I guess some are upset thinking others may follow in your footsteps. Hopefully people are here to detox, taper or just get away from drugs not up their dose to see if they can out do you.LOL
Have a good day Ali and a Very Merry Christmas! Rae
Don't sweat it! It's not like your getting extra brownies by lying to any of us. I have no clue why people would be jealous of the fact that you took high enough doses to kill a horse and didn't die, right? It's all crazy that someone would sit up at 3 am and concern themselves with what you used to take. Thank goodness you are no longer in the hell you once were and you seem to be on the right track now. You should be commended and NOT fried at the stake...I guess some are upset thinking others may follow in your footsteps. Hopefully people are here to detox, taper or just get away from drugs not up their dose to see if they can out do you.LOL
Have a good day Ali and a Very Merry Christmas! Rae
yes, a 34 year addiction to opiates taught me a great many things, ali.
i learned how to discern bovine fecal matter when i see it.
as addicts we do develop a tolerance. i never met another addict who had a higher tolerance to opiates than myself. that is, until i met you.
as an addict with an extremely high tolerance to opiates, on my best day, i could never have done the amounts of dilaudid that you have claimed to be doing and lived to tell about it - certainly not day after day.
also, as someone who lost their spouse to cancer and watched their daughter overcome hodgkin's lymphoma, i am very familiar with the way that dilaudid is prescribed. no medical doctor on this planet would ever prescribe this drug to a patient in the amounts you have indicated. at least no doctor that had any aspirations to keep practicing medicine.
tolerance has very little to do with certain immutable laws of the universe - some things are just out and out impossible.
i guess, more than anything, i just hate being lied to - over and over again. but, hey, that's my issue - i'll try to work on it.
*sdr*
i learned how to discern bovine fecal matter when i see it.
as addicts we do develop a tolerance. i never met another addict who had a higher tolerance to opiates than myself. that is, until i met you.
as an addict with an extremely high tolerance to opiates, on my best day, i could never have done the amounts of dilaudid that you have claimed to be doing and lived to tell about it - certainly not day after day.
also, as someone who lost their spouse to cancer and watched their daughter overcome hodgkin's lymphoma, i am very familiar with the way that dilaudid is prescribed. no medical doctor on this planet would ever prescribe this drug to a patient in the amounts you have indicated. at least no doctor that had any aspirations to keep practicing medicine.
tolerance has very little to do with certain immutable laws of the universe - some things are just out and out impossible.
i guess, more than anything, i just hate being lied to - over and over again. but, hey, that's my issue - i'll try to work on it.
*sdr*
oops, i almost forgot - LOLOLOL
*sdr*
*sdr*
Dear Rae,
Your RIGHT! your right...i KNOW your right..lololol
I feel like im back in 2nd grade. Someone stole Liz Maccaigs special pencil
and the search was on...we had to sit with our backs to our cubby holes, while Elizabeth McCaig and her best friend, LOOKED in all the cubby-holes.
It was my first true E.S.P. moment...i turned around and saw their feet stop at where my cubby-hole was.......they started to giggle.
I knew instantly i was being thrown to the wolves...lololol
The embarrasement! The whole class stared at me....Ali was a PENCIL THIEF!
But i KNEW i wasnt...........
I leftclass early, went home and cried, threw up, begged my Mom not to make me go back to face that class room.
My mom called their mothers....dont know what was said, but the next morning i was made to go to school. My mom said that the truth will always be revealed.
I didnt believe her, and shuffled into class, still feeling sick and not looking at anyone in the eye...
Well guess what, The teacher had Liz MacCaig up front, with her trouble making friend...and they CONFESSED, they had put it in my cubby hole.
Seems Liz's friend had actually borrowed it, but didnt know how to give it back in front of the class...she talked Liz into using me as a scape goat..lolol
Liz became a good friend....but I never got over the feeling of being judged for something that wasnt true........lolol
Im not a 7 year old anymore...and need to let it go....
Thanks for being such a good friend and understanding the whole picture..
Big hugs hug
Ali
Your RIGHT! your right...i KNOW your right..lololol
I feel like im back in 2nd grade. Someone stole Liz Maccaigs special pencil
and the search was on...we had to sit with our backs to our cubby holes, while Elizabeth McCaig and her best friend, LOOKED in all the cubby-holes.
It was my first true E.S.P. moment...i turned around and saw their feet stop at where my cubby-hole was.......they started to giggle.
I knew instantly i was being thrown to the wolves...lololol
The embarrasement! The whole class stared at me....Ali was a PENCIL THIEF!
But i KNEW i wasnt...........
I leftclass early, went home and cried, threw up, begged my Mom not to make me go back to face that class room.
My mom called their mothers....dont know what was said, but the next morning i was made to go to school. My mom said that the truth will always be revealed.
I didnt believe her, and shuffled into class, still feeling sick and not looking at anyone in the eye...
Well guess what, The teacher had Liz MacCaig up front, with her trouble making friend...and they CONFESSED, they had put it in my cubby hole.
Seems Liz's friend had actually borrowed it, but didnt know how to give it back in front of the class...she talked Liz into using me as a scape goat..lolol
Liz became a good friend....but I never got over the feeling of being judged for something that wasnt true........lolol
Im not a 7 year old anymore...and need to let it go....
Thanks for being such a good friend and understanding the whole picture..
Big hugs hug
Ali
sdr,
so are you upset ali out dosed you as an addict and thats a first for you? thats pretty damn competative
ali
is Elizabeth McCaig the reason that drove you to using drugs? you never got over that childhood trauma heheh
boy i dont know i'm haven a hard time keeping up.
terrianne
so are you upset ali out dosed you as an addict and thats a first for you? thats pretty damn competative
ali
is Elizabeth McCaig the reason that drove you to using drugs? you never got over that childhood trauma heheh
boy i dont know i'm haven a hard time keeping up.
terrianne
Hey Alicap,
I agree with what Rae has said. Really doesn't matter what anybody else thinks. You don't have to prove nothing to anybody here. I honestly don't know why people concern themselves with somebody elses business anyway. I really love the ones that claim they are protecting the board. Yeah right? It's about protecting their popularity is all. That's what this board has become. A popularity contest. I've seen people stick up for others that they know are wrong. So many a$$ kissers on this board.
So Ali, Just ignore them for now on. They aren't worth your time.
Love,
Liz
I agree with what Rae has said. Really doesn't matter what anybody else thinks. You don't have to prove nothing to anybody here. I honestly don't know why people concern themselves with somebody elses business anyway. I really love the ones that claim they are protecting the board. Yeah right? It's about protecting their popularity is all. That's what this board has become. A popularity contest. I've seen people stick up for others that they know are wrong. So many a$$ kissers on this board.
So Ali, Just ignore them for now on. They aren't worth your time.
Love,
Liz
P.S.
Just for the record....lolol
I never said i wasnt an addict right now...im addicted to these damn pills and ive said that over and over and over again.
Ive also said that ive learned that I can not judge others addictions whether it be heroin, smack, or whatever. I am no better or worse. i became addicted to my narcotic....and am paying the price.
The confusion here is that Ive stated that FOR ME, I do not feel i have to wera a label over my head for the rest OF MY LIFE saying Im an addict.
If someone feels the need to do that to stay clean than GREAT!!! I do not judge them for doing so..........
I know its not a popular theory that you can get addicted to something, stop using it and MOVE on with your life....certainly not popular with those in "The program"
This however is NOT a 12 step program board, thus i have shared my opinion.
It needs to be pointed out that sdr IS in the program as is a few more of the negative finger pointing posters....Most in the program do not JUDGE me for that opinion...they think Im naive..lolol but dont judge me.
Those that follow and LIVE the steps, have not judged me for having that opinion. Those are TRUE followers of the program.
Hugs to all, even those that judge me,
Ali
Just for the record....lolol
I never said i wasnt an addict right now...im addicted to these damn pills and ive said that over and over and over again.
Ive also said that ive learned that I can not judge others addictions whether it be heroin, smack, or whatever. I am no better or worse. i became addicted to my narcotic....and am paying the price.
The confusion here is that Ive stated that FOR ME, I do not feel i have to wera a label over my head for the rest OF MY LIFE saying Im an addict.
If someone feels the need to do that to stay clean than GREAT!!! I do not judge them for doing so..........
I know its not a popular theory that you can get addicted to something, stop using it and MOVE on with your life....certainly not popular with those in "The program"
This however is NOT a 12 step program board, thus i have shared my opinion.
It needs to be pointed out that sdr IS in the program as is a few more of the negative finger pointing posters....Most in the program do not JUDGE me for that opinion...they think Im naive..lolol but dont judge me.
Those that follow and LIVE the steps, have not judged me for having that opinion. Those are TRUE followers of the program.
Hugs to all, even those that judge me,
Ali
2nd that Liz... time i speak up too. How r u today? Luv, Bri :)
Hi Bri,
I'm doing ok. Glad I will be starting school next week. How are you doing?
I'm doing ok. Glad I will be starting school next week. How are you doing?
Liz and bree,
You are right, and i HATE the need to defend myself...especially here.
It just hurts to think thatafter all this time here...some think that everything I have contributed, for myself and others...is based on LIES..
And it hurts a bit too to be judged by those you feel would understand.
Hugs to you both,
Im going to go do something else..I gave myself a headache..lololol
Thankyou truly for making me feel better.
Hugs
]Ali
You are right, and i HATE the need to defend myself...especially here.
It just hurts to think thatafter all this time here...some think that everything I have contributed, for myself and others...is based on LIES..
And it hurts a bit too to be judged by those you feel would understand.
Hugs to you both,
Im going to go do something else..I gave myself a headache..lololol
Thankyou truly for making me feel better.
Hugs
]Ali
Good, good. I bet you are ready... someday i am gonna go back to school too. I thought about visiting one of the career counselors to find out what i would really be happy doing. God knows i can't and wont do this for the rest of my life...lol! What are you going for again?
yep, terrianne, that's it! i feel utterly worthless and defeated that a non-addict could out dose me.
*sigh*
Hey Bri,
I'm thinking of becoming an Elementary teacher. This board has given me so much experience in that field. LOL
I'm thinking of becoming an Elementary teacher. This board has given me so much experience in that field. LOL
Alicap...
I feel for you, because many on this site have been pushed out by self-righteous, indignant people. I had a heavy addiction to narcotics, before that a raging alcoholic and numerous other hard drugs. I now only smoke mary jane for my pain levels. I took methadone for two days to get off all the opiates, and now I have been clean from them for awhile. I hope you can find an alternative to those sick, twisted pills. Don't listen to the fools, listen to the individual's on here that have a heart.
Humbly,
Blah
I feel for you, because many on this site have been pushed out by self-righteous, indignant people. I had a heavy addiction to narcotics, before that a raging alcoholic and numerous other hard drugs. I now only smoke mary jane for my pain levels. I took methadone for two days to get off all the opiates, and now I have been clean from them for awhile. I hope you can find an alternative to those sick, twisted pills. Don't listen to the fools, listen to the individual's on here that have a heart.
Humbly,
Blah
LMAO!!!! You are so funny! You know, i use to want to be a elementary teacher. But, i just dont know anymore. I think i would be happier helping adults... social worker or counselor? I don't know. I just don't wanna be working retail or fast food or daycare all my life. And if i do elementary it would have to be at least the 2nd grade or higher. That way they are better able to pay attention in class. I use to play "school" all the time growing up. I will put it in God's hands... whatever happens, happens. Love, Bri :)
liz,
that was good, yes you are well experienced in elementry my dear and you can even use me for a refference on your resume if ya need one : )
terrianne
that was good, yes you are well experienced in elementry my dear and you can even use me for a refference on your resume if ya need one : )
terrianne
Thanks Bri and Terrianne,
I start school next week, I'm so looking forward to it. Right now I think being an elementary teacher is the way I want to go. But I may change my mind. The good thing about the courses I'm taking is they can take me many different directions.
I start school next week, I'm so looking forward to it. Right now I think being an elementary teacher is the way I want to go. But I may change my mind. The good thing about the courses I'm taking is they can take me many different directions.
That's true... i should at least start getting my basics out of the way. Then i will not have to worry about those. The thing that sucks about me going to nursing school is that not one of those classes i took can go toward a degree. Sad huh? Anyhow... you all have a good day... i will be on later. Luv, Bri :)
Hey Bri,
You're much younger then me. You have a lot of time yet to decide what you want to do. Hang in there. It will come to you. Have a great day.
Love,
Liz
You're much younger then me. You have a lot of time yet to decide what you want to do. Hang in there. It will come to you. Have a great day.
Love,
Liz
