HI Kirsty got off with a suspended sentance,but on coming out of court went straight to her sisters ofice and played hell. She did'nt want to stay in Cardiff , so Stacey has fetched her back to the valleys.
She has phoned me asking for money for bed and breakfastbut I refused , the trouble is it has caused a row between me and my old'st daughter because she should have left her in Cardiff.
I know she is going to be hammering on the door tonight, and I am going to have to send for the police.She tells me she is my daughter, I know that but it is starting to sinck in that I am not her to be abused, I loved and cherished her but she is not doing the same to me.
How do we cope with all this , I take my hat off to all you out there that keep posative and keep the love in your heart for who ever you are supporting.I find it difficult sometimes to keep that love alive when all the abuse is being thrown my way.
Love to you all Welsh Lady xxxx
Welsh lady -
I can TOTALLY relate to the abuse. I was the one who always seemed to be on the receiving end of my daughter's tirades, sometimes verbal sometimes slightly physical, but always ugly. Her dad escaped most of it. It is VERY difficult to love that person who does everything she can to manipulate your feelings, make you feel lousy, call you horrible names, and test your limits all the time. I missed my daughter - this person was a stranger, an abusive, mean, shouting, angry stranger.
That stopped once she got clean. That voice you hear is the drug's voice. The banging on the door, that's the craving screaming to be satisfied. Like Bryn always says, if they find a way to get their drugs, they'll find a way to eat.
Her sister did not help her, all she did was dump her on you. She needs to stay out of it unless she wants to assume responsibility for her sister. Sounds like she was trying to make her go away to avoid embarrassment. Tell her to support your decisions or make her own, but that her decisions to help her sister should not involve you.
My heart goes out to you across the Atlantic; it's a terrible thing.
Peace~MomNMore
I can TOTALLY relate to the abuse. I was the one who always seemed to be on the receiving end of my daughter's tirades, sometimes verbal sometimes slightly physical, but always ugly. Her dad escaped most of it. It is VERY difficult to love that person who does everything she can to manipulate your feelings, make you feel lousy, call you horrible names, and test your limits all the time. I missed my daughter - this person was a stranger, an abusive, mean, shouting, angry stranger.
That stopped once she got clean. That voice you hear is the drug's voice. The banging on the door, that's the craving screaming to be satisfied. Like Bryn always says, if they find a way to get their drugs, they'll find a way to eat.
Her sister did not help her, all she did was dump her on you. She needs to stay out of it unless she wants to assume responsibility for her sister. Sounds like she was trying to make her go away to avoid embarrassment. Tell her to support your decisions or make her own, but that her decisions to help her sister should not involve you.
My heart goes out to you across the Atlantic; it's a terrible thing.
Peace~MomNMore
Dam I just replied to this but my daughter deleted all my message so I will try again...lol.
I would firstly like to say that I admire you for what you are doing. Its hard enough with a loved one but when its your own flesh and blood. I have heard what Kevin used to put his Mam through and I know it aint easy.
You end up blamin yourself for what they are doing, but remember not to give in with cash etc because I used to give in too easy and give Kevin the money, so even though he used to want to give up as soon as the withdrawels kicked in he knew he could get his own way by getting money and then he would go and score.
Your daughter am sure will sort herself out once she has truly hit rock bottom, if she wants it bad enough. Thats the thing though no matter what us...partners, parents of addicts want, it dont mean nothing unless the addict really wants it and has the willpower to fight off this horrible addiction.
Before I met Kevin I had heard of all nasty tales of heroin but when you experience it in your life you eralise just how bad. Gradually you loose one thing after another till you have nothing. No shame, no dignity and no pride!!
I really hope you dont blame yourself for any of this like I did. Your doing all that you can do within your power. Stay strong. Surely things can only get better. xx
I would firstly like to say that I admire you for what you are doing. Its hard enough with a loved one but when its your own flesh and blood. I have heard what Kevin used to put his Mam through and I know it aint easy.
You end up blamin yourself for what they are doing, but remember not to give in with cash etc because I used to give in too easy and give Kevin the money, so even though he used to want to give up as soon as the withdrawels kicked in he knew he could get his own way by getting money and then he would go and score.
Your daughter am sure will sort herself out once she has truly hit rock bottom, if she wants it bad enough. Thats the thing though no matter what us...partners, parents of addicts want, it dont mean nothing unless the addict really wants it and has the willpower to fight off this horrible addiction.
Before I met Kevin I had heard of all nasty tales of heroin but when you experience it in your life you eralise just how bad. Gradually you loose one thing after another till you have nothing. No shame, no dignity and no pride!!
I really hope you dont blame yourself for any of this like I did. Your doing all that you can do within your power. Stay strong. Surely things can only get better. xx
I have no idea how anybody copes with any of this, Welsh Lady.
my daughter has not been so lucky been in and out of prison and is in prison now.she got 180 days. has a blood clot in her groin and circulation problems due to injecting and she's not 22 yet.. i know what you are going thorough i really do.. it's hard to turn them away.. but sometimes you have to do just that.. i am a single mum and am struggling to cope.. what keeps me going is my 8 year old who needs me more than my junkie daughter..
really hope that you find some peace...
god bless
really hope that you find some peace...
god bless
