yesterday, i was going throu withdrul again, and trying ti fine monny to get pills, this is how bade things are getting, ive been just taking 1,40,oxys a day, for a little wiel now, but its the uerges that get me, and im not cherring them, so my hubby was gone allday becuse he new i was not in a good place, he does not support me in enyway, enymoer, he has taken the car away, the monny , so when he came home , i took the car, and some monny he had in a onvolp, for a tickt, and took 40,dollares, to bye, well when i got home i felt like crap, for what i have trun into, so he said xmas is off this year, and he wants nothing to do with me, how can i get throu this uerges, i get full of agnzidy, and panic attces, so made i can,t stand it, i have made a comentment to do somthing after the hioldays i can,t live like this enymoer, and my hubby cant, eather, do you think my withdrul will be bade, and what can i do, i feel so alone in this i do not get eny support, thankyou karen.
karen, i am new to this site so i'm not aware of your back ground. what i do know is staying clean has got to be for YOUwhether your husband is supportive or not. you have to gain the confidence of yourself before anyone else will trust you. he probably has had enough and is trying to protect himself from the hurt and pain of your disease. again i do not have all the facts. hang in there.
Karen.........
I can feel the sadness in your post.
Is there any way in the world you could possibly get back into rehab? What about suboxone? I thought I was hopeless until I found the sub, It changed every aspect of my life.
I know with all my heart you are a loving giving person, that has just gotten lost in this..............
and you can get out............Please find some support now, not later..........Why wait until after Christmas? Do it now.
Please keep posting, I am always reading your posts.
Hugs.
I can feel the sadness in your post.
Is there any way in the world you could possibly get back into rehab? What about suboxone? I thought I was hopeless until I found the sub, It changed every aspect of my life.
I know with all my heart you are a loving giving person, that has just gotten lost in this..............
and you can get out............Please find some support now, not later..........Why wait until after Christmas? Do it now.
Please keep posting, I am always reading your posts.
Hugs.
java Karen is in Canada they do not have it there.
You have to ask yourself, how many times are you going through this?
I really do not know what else to say that hasn't been said, except get back into Rehab. You did it once, you can do it again.
Ask yourself, 'what is the worse that can happen, if you don't go'. I think you know the answer.
Karen
Please know I am not judging you. I am an addict just like you. But, you have been a member of this board longer than I have. You always come here and post the same things over and over and over. It's a part of the insanity of active addiction. I have seen many knowledgeable people give you some great advice. Then, you don't reply, we never know if you even read it, and you come back a week or two later and post the same questions. I feel like you keep asking for help and then when people try to help you, you don't respond. Then I see yet another thread from you, asking the same things and people have stopped replying. It's not because they don't care, it's because they don't think you are reading or listening.
Look to the left of this screen, right above recommended reading. It says active forum topics. See where it says "Going Through Withdrawal Again"? You can click on that, it's one of your posts from a couple of weeks ago when you ran out of meds. It is loaded with good advice.
You don't have to live this way, Karen. I wish you the best.
Please know I am not judging you. I am an addict just like you. But, you have been a member of this board longer than I have. You always come here and post the same things over and over and over. It's a part of the insanity of active addiction. I have seen many knowledgeable people give you some great advice. Then, you don't reply, we never know if you even read it, and you come back a week or two later and post the same questions. I feel like you keep asking for help and then when people try to help you, you don't respond. Then I see yet another thread from you, asking the same things and people have stopped replying. It's not because they don't care, it's because they don't think you are reading or listening.
Look to the left of this screen, right above recommended reading. It says active forum topics. See where it says "Going Through Withdrawal Again"? You can click on that, it's one of your posts from a couple of weeks ago when you ran out of meds. It is loaded with good advice.
You don't have to live this way, Karen. I wish you the best.
thankyou for your onesty, somtimes its hard to here, i have taken steps to do somthing about my addiction, its been 2 days with baely none, in me, so so i no i can do it, there is a good reason way i won,t go back into rehab, ive been given the tools to now what to do, its just doing it, but you are writ im tryerd off suffering, and seeing my famile suffer to, again i thankyou for your onesty, love karen
Karen,
I just wish you happiness and freedom from the hell you are going through. I'm sorry if my post sounded harsh, but I do wonder if you read some of the advice given. This thread has over 100 views and not many posts. It's not because people don't care, it's just that they say the same things over and over.
About rehab.....I think you should go. Maybe you have the tools, but clearly you are not using them. Perhaps those tools need sharpened? It can't hurt to go to rehab, it can only help. Don't worry about what your husband says he will or will not do. He's threatened to leave you a zillion times, yet he's still there. If you come out clean and sober it just gives him reasons to STAY and work things out. If you two are meant to stay together you will. If you're meant to separate, you will. Getting clean increases your odds of the best possible outcome, whatever that may be.
I wish you a very Merry Christmas, Karen. Why not give yourself the gift of sobriety? Freedom from these chains of hell that have such a tight grip on you. Nobody can do it for you, you must do it for yourself.
I'll bet you $10,000 that if you come here and post about action you have taken or progress you have made, you'll get a ton of replies and support.
Best wishes to you. You're a sweet lady. You deserve to be happy. Things will become much clearer once you get these drugs out of your body, and keep them out for awhile. Willpower is not enough.
Take care,
Atlas
I just wish you happiness and freedom from the hell you are going through. I'm sorry if my post sounded harsh, but I do wonder if you read some of the advice given. This thread has over 100 views and not many posts. It's not because people don't care, it's just that they say the same things over and over.
About rehab.....I think you should go. Maybe you have the tools, but clearly you are not using them. Perhaps those tools need sharpened? It can't hurt to go to rehab, it can only help. Don't worry about what your husband says he will or will not do. He's threatened to leave you a zillion times, yet he's still there. If you come out clean and sober it just gives him reasons to STAY and work things out. If you two are meant to stay together you will. If you're meant to separate, you will. Getting clean increases your odds of the best possible outcome, whatever that may be.
I wish you a very Merry Christmas, Karen. Why not give yourself the gift of sobriety? Freedom from these chains of hell that have such a tight grip on you. Nobody can do it for you, you must do it for yourself.
I'll bet you $10,000 that if you come here and post about action you have taken or progress you have made, you'll get a ton of replies and support.
Best wishes to you. You're a sweet lady. You deserve to be happy. Things will become much clearer once you get these drugs out of your body, and keep them out for awhile. Willpower is not enough.
Take care,
Atlas
Wow, Atlas. I think you should be a counselor. You are good.
Karen, maybe this is what you need to show yourself that using just plain sucks and it always comes back to the same result; out of pills, hurting, and life looking grim.
one thing that sobriety has given me is HOPE. That hope shines t hrough all of the tests and unpleasant things that come my way. I didn't have that while using; it was a black mess.
You have to be willing; can you go back to rehab? I think that is a great idea. Give yourself that chance of walking out clean.
Merry Christmas.
Karen, maybe this is what you need to show yourself that using just plain sucks and it always comes back to the same result; out of pills, hurting, and life looking grim.
one thing that sobriety has given me is HOPE. That hope shines t hrough all of the tests and unpleasant things that come my way. I didn't have that while using; it was a black mess.
You have to be willing; can you go back to rehab? I think that is a great idea. Give yourself that chance of walking out clean.
Merry Christmas.
well i have taken some acction, i went 3 days with no pills, and it was not as bade as i thot it would be, and my head did feel clerer, i have made aragnments, with a vary close friend to doll them out to me for the month, she is not a addict, but is my sponsor, its time for me to take my life back, i have been so lost thes last few years, atles, i thankyou for your caering, i can handel the onest, there is this place in ont, were the have a good rehabe, i just did not want to go back to the one here, becuse of, my hole famile is involved, inlays, and all, to mush shame,and to mush gosiop, i live in a vary small towne, so every one nows your bissnes, not good, but like i said if i can,t do this with my feiend, i will go away, to this rehabe, thankyou again, and have a great cristmas, love karen.
Karen-There comes a point when we run out of excuses.Trying to keep up appearances when our a** is falling off seems a bit insane.
Going to any lengths is not ambiguous.It means"I'm going to save my life right now and all these peripheral excuses I keep coming up with are not going to stop me."
The only right time to get clean is now.
When you post again I want to see how your rehab is going.I don't want to read about more pills and who is hiding them from who.LOL
Your thread reads"Did something Really Stupid".....how about "I Did Something Really Right" next time?
We may have a disease but we are responsible for the treatment.
That treatment is not a bulletin board.It's detox,rehab and a 12th step program followed up by therapy.
Good Luck
Going to any lengths is not ambiguous.It means"I'm going to save my life right now and all these peripheral excuses I keep coming up with are not going to stop me."
The only right time to get clean is now.
When you post again I want to see how your rehab is going.I don't want to read about more pills and who is hiding them from who.LOL
Your thread reads"Did something Really Stupid".....how about "I Did Something Really Right" next time?
We may have a disease but we are responsible for the treatment.
That treatment is not a bulletin board.It's detox,rehab and a 12th step program followed up by therapy.
Good Luck
Karen,
There is NO SHAME is getting help for an addiction, period.
Your family, in laws, everyone...they already know you are an addict. They probably gossip about you already, that's just how life is. Why not give them something POSITIVE to talk about? Don't worry about others. Do not care what they say or do. Focus on you, your life and saving that life.
You've been 3 days without pills, why would you start taking them again now? The physical part is going to start getting better any time now, and you are going to take more pills? I would like you to rethink that. Now is the perfect time to get to rehab, or at the very least 2 meetings a day, and get to work on the mental part. You're most of the way through the physical part if it's been 3 days and no pills. In another 3-4 more days, you will be a whole new woman. If you think your head is clearer now, just stay off those devils for a few more days. You will be amazed!
How is your sponsor not an addict? I thought sponsors had to be recovering addicts or alcoholics?
Keep posting, Karen, but Tim is right, you need more than this board. Not just you, all of us. Please rethink putting another pill in your mouth. After 3 whole days do you really want to start over????? Please post back if you are still online.
Take care,
Atlas
There is NO SHAME is getting help for an addiction, period.
Your family, in laws, everyone...they already know you are an addict. They probably gossip about you already, that's just how life is. Why not give them something POSITIVE to talk about? Don't worry about others. Do not care what they say or do. Focus on you, your life and saving that life.
You've been 3 days without pills, why would you start taking them again now? The physical part is going to start getting better any time now, and you are going to take more pills? I would like you to rethink that. Now is the perfect time to get to rehab, or at the very least 2 meetings a day, and get to work on the mental part. You're most of the way through the physical part if it's been 3 days and no pills. In another 3-4 more days, you will be a whole new woman. If you think your head is clearer now, just stay off those devils for a few more days. You will be amazed!
How is your sponsor not an addict? I thought sponsors had to be recovering addicts or alcoholics?
Keep posting, Karen, but Tim is right, you need more than this board. Not just you, all of us. Please rethink putting another pill in your mouth. After 3 whole days do you really want to start over????? Please post back if you are still online.
Take care,
Atlas
You have gone three days, why go back? Maybe I misunderstood, but why not just stay stopped?
I understand if it is for ativan; you need to wean off of that. But as far as opiates, you are almost home, right?
Help me understand...
I understand if it is for ativan; you need to wean off of that. But as far as opiates, you are almost home, right?
Help me understand...
Atlas quotes-How is your sponsor not an addict? I thought sponsors had to be recovering addicts or alcoholics?
OMG.....I missed that little tidbit.That's not going to work out and Atlas is right.Why in the hell if you've been off for 3 days would you start taking them again?I need to read these post closer.LOL
A sponsor is a recovering addict/alcoholic who is sober and clean and has worked the twelve steps.
I do not understand this but there is no sanity when it comes to addiction.
OMG.....I missed that little tidbit.That's not going to work out and Atlas is right.Why in the hell if you've been off for 3 days would you start taking them again?I need to read these post closer.LOL
A sponsor is a recovering addict/alcoholic who is sober and clean and has worked the twelve steps.
I do not understand this but there is no sanity when it comes to addiction.
Sending Tim a triple espresso......;-0
LOL
No sh*t.My eyes are moving faster than my mind.
No sh*t.My eyes are moving faster than my mind.
thanks for the replys, no i did not take them, changed my mine, i don,t now if i have ever, told yous, but i went throu rehabe 20 years, ago, and was sober for most off thoes years, so in the last few years, ive gone back on pain meds becuse of injurys, i did realy well for a longtime, but when i was put on the oxys, well we all now how that works, i still go to mettings and as for my sponsor, she is in recovory, but she was not addicted to eny subcenc, just the stenking thinking, but she has been thro a lot with me, i now somtimes its hard to say what im going thro, but the pills are just a small part of our deesi, its the thinking, and lack off selfworth, i have done menny invortores, and try not to keep secrts, enymoer, its like they say one day at a time so thats what im working on today, i wish you all a merycristmas, thanks agine love karen
So you have 4 days now? Right? Karen, you have got be just about done with the physical part. I must urge you to check into rehab at this point. It sounds like you have some understanding of why you abuse the pills. Your whole life might begin to turn around if you go to rehab NOW, before you take another pill. With 4 days under your belt, there's no better time.
I still don't understand how your sponsor is not an addict??? Might be a good idea to have TWO sponsors. This person may be a positive influence in your life, but I think you need a recovering addict as a sponsor also.
Merry Christmas to you too Karen.
I still don't understand how your sponsor is not an addict??? Might be a good idea to have TWO sponsors. This person may be a positive influence in your life, but I think you need a recovering addict as a sponsor also.
Merry Christmas to you too Karen.
Karen quotes- she is in recovory, but she was not addicted to eny subcenc, just the stenking thinking,
?
What does that mean? Were you in a different kind of program other than NA/AA? What kind of meetings do you still go to? If they are NA meetings are you honest about your using?
All these things you did in the past are in the past.In the present what you need to do is get back into rehab and come clean at your meeting.I may not be following your post but I hear a lot of double talk.
If you are going to NA meetings and being honest I'm sure the people there have confronted you.
I hope you do something fast Karen.
Good Luck and Merry Christmas
?
What does that mean? Were you in a different kind of program other than NA/AA? What kind of meetings do you still go to? If they are NA meetings are you honest about your using?
All these things you did in the past are in the past.In the present what you need to do is get back into rehab and come clean at your meeting.I may not be following your post but I hear a lot of double talk.
If you are going to NA meetings and being honest I'm sure the people there have confronted you.
I hope you do something fast Karen.
Good Luck and Merry Christmas
Tim,
I thought AA/NA was for people recovering from addiction to substances? Are there other reasons that people go?
I thought AA/NA was for people recovering from addiction to substances? Are there other reasons that people go?
Atlas...
It is . Although I guess one could go hang out there for the hell of it but I can't imagine anyone being that bored.LOL
It can get boring enough when you have to be there.
With all the different groups now that have started from the 12 step format,I'm sure there is one for everything?
I'm confused but Karen never does stick around and answer these questions.
All we are doing is trying to help but it is what it is.What you gonna do?
I hope you do something really good for yourself on Christmas.
Have a good one.
It is . Although I guess one could go hang out there for the hell of it but I can't imagine anyone being that bored.LOL
It can get boring enough when you have to be there.
With all the different groups now that have started from the 12 step format,I'm sure there is one for everything?
I'm confused but Karen never does stick around and answer these questions.
All we are doing is trying to help but it is what it is.What you gonna do?
I hope you do something really good for yourself on Christmas.
Have a good one.
