I had started a new thread for you thinking you might get lost in the shuffle, but I see many have found you.....so I added what I posted.
Tainted Tears,
I am writing to you today to try to help you and give you some understanding.
You mother loves you know that, keep that in your heart always. She is troubled, hurting and weak against the drugs. This is not a reflection of the type of person she truely is. This is the face of a disease that many on here deal with everyday. You may never understand her pain, what she feels, and why she runs away from all the good in her life and turns herself over to drugs. After time the drugs take over so much that finding a way out can seem impossible to her. The walls grow so high, the heart closes off all love, nothing of hope or goodness is excepted.
Try if you can to put into words on paper the feeling of love you have for your mother. Tell her of the hope you have for her and of the dreams you have for yourself. Try to make her understanding with your words that you want her to live out your dreams with her. That you have not given up hope for her, that you have not and will not accept that this is who she really is deep inside. Help to break down those walls she built around her heart. In hope of giving her faith to start anew.
Please take care of yourself, and never lose faith in you. You would make any parent proud. What a wondeful and beautiful person you are, know that and remember it.
Much Love,
Guardian Angel
Tainted, take it from a mom who never in her life ever ever ever wanted to hurt her kids..
Once the addiction takes over, it is very difficult to stop. You made me cry from your post...and now I can't stop...
Please know that it wasn't you. Sometimes moms have a hard time coping.
Please, seek some counsel...get someone to hug you, girly...
And just know that it has nothing to do with you...
Your mom really never wanted to hurt you, dear.
It may not seem like that...I would give anything to start over, and I am sure she would too.
Kerry
Once the addiction takes over, it is very difficult to stop. You made me cry from your post...and now I can't stop...
Please know that it wasn't you. Sometimes moms have a hard time coping.
Please, seek some counsel...get someone to hug you, girly...
And just know that it has nothing to do with you...
Your mom really never wanted to hurt you, dear.
It may not seem like that...I would give anything to start over, and I am sure she would too.
Kerry
