Hi.
I am a friend of Resh (or Reshie) from the local N.A. fellowship. I am part of the support network for all addicts in our local area. These are mainly alcoholics and drug addicts but we also support those with other addictions including gambling,eating disorders,self-harm,porn addiction and so on.
The general advice given to those new in the fellowship is for them to attend as many meetings as possible in the first ninety days,to get a sponsor to help guide them through the initial phase(introduction to the 12-step programme) and to concentrate on their own recovery. Relationships of a romantic type are stongly discouraged.
Resh chose for his own reasons to follow some of the guidelines but to ignore others. Against mine and others advice,he got involved with a young lady that is herself suffering with multiple addictions. I believe he felt that together as a couple,they would be better able deal with their individual addictions and help each other through their intense loneliness that they both seemed to suffer with. This approach I am sorry to say has not only failed them both but set them both back in their individual recovery.
Obviously I cannot discuss what has happened.I was unaware that Resh was using this site until today when he called me asking for my help which he was very much in need of. When things have settled down,he may choose to re-visit this site and explain what has happened. This is up to him.
I am here at his request as he is unable at this moment to do this himself. It is evident that he holds a number of you in high regard and informs me that you have played a significant part in his recovery thus far. I am prepared to accept this. So I convey to those of you who know him and who wish him well in his recovery his best wishes and his sincere apologies for having insulted some amonst you. He declares to me that this was never his intention. I can neither comfirm or deny this as I am not aware of what he has or hasn't done. What I can say is that he is at present slightly delusional,paranoid and quite fearful.I'm sure that you can appreciate that it is not appropriate for me to discuss details any furthur.
It is the desire of those of us in his support network to limit the fall-out from this unfortunate episode so that he does not slide into despair and turn a temporary setback into a permanant one.That would turn a mistake into a tragedy.
A friend and fellow recovering addict - clean,just for today.
Thanks for letting us know, do send him my love. He hasn't insulted anyone but is clearly paranoid that he has and any reassurances have fallen on deaf ears. Give him my best wishes and i'm glad he reached out to you for help.
xxxxx
xxxxx
Thank you for posting--please let Reshie know he is in our thoughts and prayers.
Rachel
Rachel
Please convey my friendship and best wishes to Reshie, we'll be here when he's ready. Get well mate. kat x
Thank you for letting us know. We also hold him in high regard...he is intelligent and compassionate and your explanation of his current state of mind explains a lot about his most recent posts. I was afraid for him and hope for nothing but the very best for him.
Hope he feels he can come back soon...apologies are completely unnecessary...we are here to support one another through whatever comes.
Please give him my best~MomNMore
Hope he feels he can come back soon...apologies are completely unnecessary...we are here to support one another through whatever comes.
Please give him my best~MomNMore
Thank you for letting us know how Resh is.
Let him know we're all thinking of him and sending up prayers.He's a kind soul.
Let him know we're all thinking of him and sending up prayers.He's a kind soul.
Guest ,
Thanks for the update- - but dont forget, we have nothing to go on but your word.
You say your a friend -are you his sponsor?
You state> "What I can say is that he is at present slightly delusional,paranoid "- - not that your opinion isnt valid, but not being a psychologist ,those are some pretty strong accusations.
We all hope Resh the best in his struggle, obviously we dont have contact with him as you do. Dont take offense to any of this, but as a addict Im just naturally curious . I think you should be commended for your interest and help, but without knowing anything about you -firsthand from Resh himself,I just wonder . How long do have you known Resh? Have you known him for many years "outside of the 12 step rooms"- The way you stated that he didnt follow your advise makes me think that you have many years clean, Do you?
He must have real faith in your judgement- for you to be the one to decide for him,when things have settled down,
We hope he chooses to re-visit this site - no explanation is needed as no judgements are made...
best regards
jack
Thanks for the update- - but dont forget, we have nothing to go on but your word.
You say your a friend -are you his sponsor?
You state> "What I can say is that he is at present slightly delusional,paranoid "- - not that your opinion isnt valid, but not being a psychologist ,those are some pretty strong accusations.
We all hope Resh the best in his struggle, obviously we dont have contact with him as you do. Dont take offense to any of this, but as a addict Im just naturally curious . I think you should be commended for your interest and help, but without knowing anything about you -firsthand from Resh himself,I just wonder . How long do have you known Resh? Have you known him for many years "outside of the 12 step rooms"- The way you stated that he didnt follow your advise makes me think that you have many years clean, Do you?
He must have real faith in your judgement- for you to be the one to decide for him,when things have settled down,
We hope he chooses to re-visit this site - no explanation is needed as no judgements are made...
best regards
jack
Hi.
I have passed on everyone's best wishes.
To:Jackofharzz, You have listed the website for doctors without borders at the foot of your note. If you are a professional colleage of Resh's from medcine sans frontiers and have concerns about his current care,then I suggest you act on this through the proper and established channels.
I am here purely at Resh's request.I neither confirm nor deny I am his sponsor. I make no claims as to how well I do or do not know him. Those who wish to engage in conjecture are welcome to do so. As soon as he is able to,he will decide for himself how best to proceed.
A friend and fellow addict in recovery: clean,just for today.
I have passed on everyone's best wishes.
To:Jackofharzz, You have listed the website for doctors without borders at the foot of your note. If you are a professional colleage of Resh's from medcine sans frontiers and have concerns about his current care,then I suggest you act on this through the proper and established channels.
I am here purely at Resh's request.I neither confirm nor deny I am his sponsor. I make no claims as to how well I do or do not know him. Those who wish to engage in conjecture are welcome to do so. As soon as he is able to,he will decide for himself how best to proceed.
A friend and fellow addict in recovery: clean,just for today.
this site gets really dramatic at times and a little combative..i need to just step a way a tad and search for positive steps in helping my son and 0ur family go on the right path , will visit, but not quite as often, good luck to all of you
Guest writer
Was Just asking-
I said we are all addicts, and are naturally suspicious- many of 12 step groups.
I also asked that "no offense "be taken . I also said we all hope for the best for resh.
I dont intend to qualify my concerns more than that.
If you truly believe our colleague is delusional and paranoid , I trust you'll do the right thing and find the proper help.
btw---
I put a link up for doctors without borders because it is an association I contribute to and believe in. Thats all. I dont ask for or claim anything-
Im in my 50,s friend ,so Im not a youngster, with close to 2000 posts on here - Ive seen more than 1 come on this board under questionable agenga,s
If you feel some of your comments were challanged - let me apoligize*That wasnt the intention**
- - no need to respond ,I believe we talked out what was needed to be,
wishing the best-and >>and
sending much respect
jack
Was Just asking-
I said we are all addicts, and are naturally suspicious- many of 12 step groups.
I also asked that "no offense "be taken . I also said we all hope for the best for resh.
I dont intend to qualify my concerns more than that.
If you truly believe our colleague is delusional and paranoid , I trust you'll do the right thing and find the proper help.
btw---
I put a link up for doctors without borders because it is an association I contribute to and believe in. Thats all. I dont ask for or claim anything-
Im in my 50,s friend ,so Im not a youngster, with close to 2000 posts on here - Ive seen more than 1 come on this board under questionable agenga,s
If you feel some of your comments were challanged - let me apoligize*That wasnt the intention**
- - no need to respond ,I believe we talked out what was needed to be,
wishing the best-and >>and
sending much respect
jack
I'm back.
I'm so so sorry for everything.
Reshie.
I'm so so sorry for everything.
Reshie.
Hello Resh how are you feeling tonight/morning? I've been thinking about you a lot& i so hope you feel better give me a shout out when your ready
Put it behind you where it belongs, reshie. You need some sleep, food, fresh air, and exercise...you can do this thing for sure.
Peace ~ M&M
Peace ~ M&M
I feel
1.awful
2.embarrased
3.hurt
4.lonely
5.isolated
6.hopelessness
7.pointlessness
8.unhappy
9.I still love my GF. I don't know how to stop it. I can't stop thinking about her. She has amuggled a message out to me from the Psychiatric unit where they have her. They are being absolutely beastly to her keeping her confined within the unit. She hasn't broken any law that I'm aware of. I want her here with me.
R>
1.awful
2.embarrased
3.hurt
4.lonely
5.isolated
6.hopelessness
7.pointlessness
8.unhappy
9.I still love my GF. I don't know how to stop it. I can't stop thinking about her. She has amuggled a message out to me from the Psychiatric unit where they have her. They are being absolutely beastly to her keeping her confined within the unit. She hasn't broken any law that I'm aware of. I want her here with me.
R>
Its not my place to say but it seems this girl maybe isnt for you.People are not sectioned for no reason& just because she cant have her own way doesnt mean shes mistreated.
Hi Reshie,
I haven't posted to you before, but I wanted to send you a message of love and hope. I have read through all your posts and you have touched me beyond belief. I know you have had a really tough time of late and I hope you can find the strength to get through this thing without lapsing. BTW I have a PhD (mental health) and know a good deal about psychiatric hospitalisation. It's not so bad (here in UK) as many people fear. Your GF may be in the place she needs to be as, I'm sure you'll admit, her behaviour was not that of a well woman. Reaching out to you Reshie, I hope you'll reply. Much love,
I haven't posted to you before, but I wanted to send you a message of love and hope. I have read through all your posts and you have touched me beyond belief. I know you have had a really tough time of late and I hope you can find the strength to get through this thing without lapsing. BTW I have a PhD (mental health) and know a good deal about psychiatric hospitalisation. It's not so bad (here in UK) as many people fear. Your GF may be in the place she needs to be as, I'm sure you'll admit, her behaviour was not that of a well woman. Reaching out to you Reshie, I hope you'll reply. Much love,
Resh you've done a total about face you just wanted her to leave you alone yesterday please think carefully about this woman-
Is she the sort of lady you could introduce to your ex & little daughter? Have you seen your daughter since this began or does she want you to herself completly?>
I wont write anymore about her i dont want you upset. Love's a funny thing it makes fools of us all. Your friend kat x
Hi again Reshie
I assume your GF has been detained under the Mental Health Act. Do you know if she's on a section two, or a section three? Makes a big difference. I have been on a section two (physician heal thyself! lol!) and was out in less than a month. A section three is three months max, with the option to renew for a further three months, and so on. You can always go and visit her... It may be presumptious for me to suggest it (as I have never posted to you before) but you could use this time away from her to take stock and decide if you really want her in you and your precious daughter's life. Loneliness and isolation is hard to bear, but a destructive co-dependant relationship is even worse (believe me, I've been in one). Wishing you all the best,
I assume your GF has been detained under the Mental Health Act. Do you know if she's on a section two, or a section three? Makes a big difference. I have been on a section two (physician heal thyself! lol!) and was out in less than a month. A section three is three months max, with the option to renew for a further three months, and so on. You can always go and visit her... It may be presumptious for me to suggest it (as I have never posted to you before) but you could use this time away from her to take stock and decide if you really want her in you and your precious daughter's life. Loneliness and isolation is hard to bear, but a destructive co-dependant relationship is even worse (believe me, I've been in one). Wishing you all the best,
